Thursday, July 05, 2007

Hardball with Chris Matthews - July 5, 2007

Hardball with Chris Matthews - July 5, 2007
Guests: Bruce Willis, Ron Christie, Mark Halperin, April Ryan, Robert Wuhl

Chris Matthews: bruce willis dood you are so sexy do you like the war of terror

Bruce Willis: dood this is just like WWII when the Japanese invaded Poland

Matthews: so true dood

Willis: osama reminds me of that dood in schindler's list

Matthews: hitler

Willis: whatever dood

Matthews: ur an expert on cyberterror

Willis: no i'm not dood

Matthews: you are real hero i luv you i want to be a real fake citizen warrior like u

Willis: i would fight for my country even if it meant spilling my latte on Rodeo Drive

Matthews: the real heroes are not the actors or producers they are of course the stuntmen

Willis: yes so many have made the ultimate sacrifice i mean of course like doing off-broadway theater

Matthews: when people die it's sad

Willis: yeah dead people should be helped its very american to offer people aid after they have been killed

Matthews: even the Moonies think Bush went to far in letting Scooter off

Christie: sentence was way excessive how dare he pursue a criminal charge against a guilty man so sad

Shrum: ha ha ha ha oh wow let me explain something this was pure Cheneyism which means they were obstructing justice to cover up Bush's crimes

Christie: there is nothing to hide blah blah blah

Shrum: oh for fuck's sake

Matthews: but Clinton has all these crimes on his rap sheet why would he weigh in

Shrum: oh fuck you

Matthews: Cisneros was teh big liar but not tied to Bill Clinton and Christie you Crazy-Eyed freak really have to stop coming on my show and stop babbling nonsense

Matthews: ok let's hear from one of the least funny men on the entire planet Robert Wuhl

Wuhl: thanx dood

Matthews: did u nail kim basinger yes or no

Wuhl: yes

Matthews: dood watch out alec baldwin is one crazy dood

The Clintons: Libby pardon wuz illegal and wrong

Matthews: the Clintons are pure evil do you agree

Halperin: you know me what do you think dood i sleep with a George W Bush pillow

Matthews: dood i have one of those

Halperin: hillary is evil she is planning to run for preznit its terrible

April Ryan: anyone who ever pardons anyone is terrible by definition also anyone married to them is guilty too

Matthews: Robert Wuhl will u at least take my hint and hate on the Clintons

Wuhl: it's all a game and no one cares or will remember all this

Matthews: i care


Matthews: Al Gore killed several people over the weekend will that hurt his chances for President?

Wuhl: most people in Hollywood have killed someone while driving speaking as an actor his real crime is gainging too much weight

Matthews: let me defend the Bush Twins they never killed anyone as far as I know like their dad

Halperin: Gore's life is too fucking good to want to subject himself to scrutiny of Bobblespeaking pundits

Matthews: he is a superstar

April Ryan: he even made Bush admit global warming is real that's pretty amazing

Matthews: thats a good cause my air conditioning bill is outta control

Matthews: edwards can't be the President because he got an expensive haircut

Wuhl: this is not a big story

Matthews: Hah!

Wuhl: Republicans have no principles and Democrats have no spines

Matthews: hes the Breck girl

Halperin: i'm rich and i'm a populist on the other hand Edwards has admitted he once kicked a homeless man on his way to the salon

Matthews: thanx we're out of time

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

dood, you are teh awsome.