***********************************************
Meet The Press - July 29, 2007
***********************************************
Chuck Todd: omg what if Gary Hart was black?
Andrea Mitchell: omg what if Obama was black?
John Harwood: YearlyKos!!!
Tim Russert: Hillary dislikes Barack Obama
Dan Balz: Team Hillary obsessed with him
Tim: why
Andrea: because he's winning and he's been bashing her generation
Tim: she hate Obama
Andrea: she also hates Edwards
Tim: don't worry we'll obsess on that in a minute
Todd: she was supposed to be the exciting candidate now suddenly she's stodgy establishment candidate it's weird no wonder she's mad
Edwards: they both suck i'm a third way guy
Harwood: andrea i like your jacket
Andrea: i saw it in the window and just had to have it
Harwood: he's leading in Iowa
Balz: polls taken in Iowa show how important Iowa is
Tim: how so
Balz: i dunno it sounded cool
Tim: so what happens
Balz: if Hillary finishes third in Iowa that would interesting
Tim: wow you're dull
Brownstein: ok here's the theory - Obama wins Iowa then rolls into New Hampshire where he leads then goes into Carolina and boom he's the nominee!!
Todd: that's right if Obama wins Iowa Hillary will conspire with Edwards to have him killed
Timmeh: let's talk about Hillary's hair
Andrea: the Post wrote about her cleavage
Timmeh: she's using her female breasts for fundraising
Tim: heh last night in Nantucket i wished i'd had the Mansierre
Balz: the Bro!!
Robinson: Obama should get the Arsenio fade that would be cool
Tim: awesome
Robinson: no that was a very good article the clothes make the man or woman
Andrea: oh baloney it was stupid
Harwood: no it was a great you see Hillary is very much like Barry Bonds on steroids you know Hillary calculates how much her breasts show
Tim: Bill probably helps her with that
Tim: Obama does better with rich whites and Hillary does better with blacks
Robinson: he must win in South Carolina it's weird that he's not doing better
Timmeh: Giuliani leads against Hillary but Obama does better against Thompson
Todd: her people are bugged that she's losing
Tim: no shit
Todd: white men automatically hate her
Balz: Thompson is definitely running he just needs to get all his gaffes out of the way first
Russert: Romney loses national polls but leads in Iowa and New Hampshire
Harwood: we should definitely let good looks and a tiny midwestern state decide the next president
Tim: but he's a polygamist
Harwood: actually that's not true
Tim: awww too bad that would be fun i want to marry my Spanglish maid
Brownstein: Let the people of Iowa Rule Us All!!!!
Robinson: Rudy leads in South Carolina it's weird because people go to church in down there
Andrea: they just love Fascism more than Fetuses
Brownstein: he says there no one national solution to shit like abortion and gun control let's let the states decide i think it's very intriguing idea myself
Andrea: it's just a dodge Ron you should know that
Balz: i asked Rudy if he thought abortion was a constitutional right
Tim: what did he say
Balz: i can't tell you that
Todd: if Romney does well in South Carolina he will be the nominee
Brownstein: exactly but how he does there depends on how he does in Iowa and N. Hampshire where he is leading
[ break ]
Schumer: what did u have for breakfast
Alberto Gonzalez: i can't tell you that
Schumer: was milk or a bowl involved
Gonzalez: i refuse to say
Andrea: he has one supporter in Washington it's really bad even the Cocktail Party people think he's a liar
Robinson: he's trying to parse something as if we all fall for his little smirking game
Harwood: well i'm persuaded by the data mining thing but i'm worried he's incompetent
Russert: sounds bad
Harwood: When Schumer punched him i wanted to give little Alberto Gonzalez a hug
Brownstein: Bush is going to introduce a mandatory salute next week but it's nothing to worry about
Todd: this is a win for Bush all the Democrats are distracted while Bush builds detention camps
Andrea: people are starting to hate on Congress it think people are "fed up with those clowns in Congress"
Tim: wow Andrea how do keep up with the news like that?
******************************************************************
Sunday, July 29, 2007
This Week With George Stephanopoulos - July 29, 2007
******************************************************
This Week With George Stephanopoulos - July 29, 2007
******************************************************
Stephanopoulos: Obama and Hillary got into a tiff wow!
Gergen: Hillary had the upper hand in the debate so why get in this fight i don't know
Zakaria: her answer was right
Stephanopoulos: but Obama only said he was “willing to talk” not talk with no preconditions
Zakaria: she's on the defensive suddenly she looks like Bush
Cokie: this is going to shock you my insight tells me first you have to win the primary then the general election
Stephanopoulos: fascinating
Cokie: the Dems are doomed this is another defeatist Vietnam
Gergen: oh absolutley the Dems are liberals and traitors
Zakaria: are you fuckers on drugs???
Gergen: why does Obama deny the Holocaust??
Stephanopoulos: yes Obama goofed - but what's interesting is he took the fight to her - he doubled down!
Cokie: oh sure he's right politically but i still feel like Obama is a dirty fucking hippie
Gergen: Hillary is strident and harsh and when she attacked Obama her forked tounge came out again
Stephanopoulos: plus Obama is supposed to be a nice guy
Cokie: right, see he's a meanie!
Steph: Edwards joked about her jacket
Cokie: i hate John Edwards he's sexist
Gergen: Democrats are all wimps
Cokie: I was offended by Edwards i've been around a long time and i just don't take offense lightly
Gergen: oh come one you got all pissy when i spilled my martini on you last night
Zakaria: i think Democrats desire to seem tough has gotten them into trouble
Stephanopoulos: wow, the really can't win
Zakaria: they are scared of Vietnam syndrome
Cokie: as well they should be -- Democrats killed 50,000 Cambodians
Gergen: Democrats want to sing Kumbayah and take LSD and turn the White House into big muddy sex-filled Woodstock acid trip
Cokie: it's so terrible i hate liberals
Stephanopoulos: holy shit you are so fucking stupid
Zakaria: you are aware Bush is widely hated right?!
Cokie: ha ha ha ha ha
Gergen: people want someone wise and serious and sensible like me
Cokie: the fucking Democrats just voted to take all troops by April - my god why don't they just nominate Bin Laden!!!
Gergen: Frankly we need bipartisanship and agreement to stay in Iraq
Cokie: this is all the Democrats fault the blood is entirely on their hands
[ stunned silence ]
Zakria: how nice for you and your bipartisan friends it will never happen because Bush is crazy
Stephanopoulos: Hillary wants to stay and Bill Richardson wants to leave
Cokie: Harry Reid hates America at some point they will surrender America to our brown enemies
Gergen: the hippies will push Hillary to not be serious and sensible
Zakaria: jeebus you do understand Bush is the President don't you??
Gergen: sorry who are you talking about???
*******************************************************
This Week With George Stephanopoulos - July 29, 2007
******************************************************
Stephanopoulos: Obama and Hillary got into a tiff wow!
Gergen: Hillary had the upper hand in the debate so why get in this fight i don't know
Zakaria: her answer was right
Stephanopoulos: but Obama only said he was “willing to talk” not talk with no preconditions
Zakaria: she's on the defensive suddenly she looks like Bush
Cokie: this is going to shock you my insight tells me first you have to win the primary then the general election
Stephanopoulos: fascinating
Cokie: the Dems are doomed this is another defeatist Vietnam
Gergen: oh absolutley the Dems are liberals and traitors
Zakaria: are you fuckers on drugs???
Gergen: why does Obama deny the Holocaust??
Stephanopoulos: yes Obama goofed - but what's interesting is he took the fight to her - he doubled down!
Cokie: oh sure he's right politically but i still feel like Obama is a dirty fucking hippie
Gergen: Hillary is strident and harsh and when she attacked Obama her forked tounge came out again
Stephanopoulos: plus Obama is supposed to be a nice guy
Cokie: right, see he's a meanie!
Steph: Edwards joked about her jacket
Cokie: i hate John Edwards he's sexist
Gergen: Democrats are all wimps
Cokie: I was offended by Edwards i've been around a long time and i just don't take offense lightly
Gergen: oh come one you got all pissy when i spilled my martini on you last night
Zakaria: i think Democrats desire to seem tough has gotten them into trouble
Stephanopoulos: wow, the really can't win
Zakaria: they are scared of Vietnam syndrome
Cokie: as well they should be -- Democrats killed 50,000 Cambodians
Gergen: Democrats want to sing Kumbayah and take LSD and turn the White House into big muddy sex-filled Woodstock acid trip
Cokie: it's so terrible i hate liberals
Stephanopoulos: holy shit you are so fucking stupid
Zakaria: you are aware Bush is widely hated right?!
Cokie: ha ha ha ha ha
Gergen: people want someone wise and serious and sensible like me
Cokie: the fucking Democrats just voted to take all troops by April - my god why don't they just nominate Bin Laden!!!
Gergen: Frankly we need bipartisanship and agreement to stay in Iraq
Cokie: this is all the Democrats fault the blood is entirely on their hands
[ stunned silence ]
Zakria: how nice for you and your bipartisan friends it will never happen because Bush is crazy
Stephanopoulos: Hillary wants to stay and Bill Richardson wants to leave
Cokie: Harry Reid hates America at some point they will surrender America to our brown enemies
Gergen: the hippies will push Hillary to not be serious and sensible
Zakaria: jeebus you do understand Bush is the President don't you??
Gergen: sorry who are you talking about???
*******************************************************
The Chris Matthews Show - Sunday, July 29, 2007
***************************************************
The Chris Matthews Show - Sunday, July 29, 2007
***************************************************
Matthews: Iraq is a total diaster but we can't leave, can we?
Duffy: 10,000 Iraqis will die every month if we leave it's terrible!!!
Matthews: there’s though lots of explosions that's not so much fun
Norah O'Donnell: we can't leave Iraq will explode i hope the american people will be patient with Bush!!
David Ignatius: the American people are selfish and wimps not strong and serious like Bush and Wise Beltway Types like me
Matthews: well i must be not be one of them cause i don't get it
Gloria Borger: Bush is a winner he has until the spring of 2008 the surge is working!!!
Matthews: Bush sez it's all about Al Qeada
Mike Duffy: Bush sez we fight them there so we don't fight them here -- but if we beat them won't they come here?
Matthews: it's like ants at a picnic just you have some in one place doesn’t mean they can’t be on you’re blanket too
Duffy: hell some Iraqis say if we leave they could kill al qaeda
Matthws: david yur a novelist thrill us with your acumen
Ignatius: no your all wrong it's all Bin Laden if we leave Iraq it's a defeat for America we can never leave we must kill all Muslims everywhere!!!!!
O'Donnell: you're making Bush's argument
Ignatius: I know i luv him
Matthews: what if we leave???
Duffy: no one wants to talk about this but omg the price of oil could up!!!!
Matthews: who should we kill?
Duffy: better kill everyone just to be safe
Matthews: so do we leave?
Ignatius: they've abandoned Maliki and the Parliament they’re turning to a a small group of power brokers they're like the Bobbleheads of Iraq
Borger: can i talk?
Matthews: if you must
Borger: Democrats hate America
Matthews: we are leaving aren't we?
Duffy: yes but we have to be like George Costanza and leave on a high note
Matthews: remember Gary Hart and Dean wow those doods were really crazy Barack Obama is looking to my really best buddy Ronald Reagan
Obama: we rise and fall together
Ignatius: i luv it!!!!!!
Matthews: ooh i'm so excited Obama hit Hillary and now she's calling him naive and he sez she's Bush-lite
Ignatius: ha ha ha i luv it!!!!
Matthews: this is so fucking awesome!
Ignatius: there's a real difference here he wants to make luv not war and she says lets fight
Borger: let me references Bobblespeaking on a Bobblespeak show
Matthews: HA HA Ha i luv it he called Obama a Holocaust Denier!!!
Duffy: this is the most important moment because he's young and she's the experienced candidate
Borger: well she is better than him
Matthews: better at what -- voting for crazy wars?
Borger: i have absolutely no idea i'm an idiot
Matthews: why do i have you on then?
Borger: because no one channels cocktail party chatter like me
Ignatius: if things get much worse in Iraq it will be good for Hillary since she voted for the war
Matthews: Gonzalez lied
O'Donnell: Bush sez no it's complicated -- besides lying isn't a bad thing anymore
Matthews: unbelievable
Panel: he's not going anywhere
Matthews: how do we get rid of this guy?
Ignatius: if he's late picking up Dick Cheney's dry cleaning
The Chris Matthews Show - Sunday, July 29, 2007
***************************************************
Matthews: Iraq is a total diaster but we can't leave, can we?
Duffy: 10,000 Iraqis will die every month if we leave it's terrible!!!
Matthews: there’s though lots of explosions that's not so much fun
Norah O'Donnell: we can't leave Iraq will explode i hope the american people will be patient with Bush!!
David Ignatius: the American people are selfish and wimps not strong and serious like Bush and Wise Beltway Types like me
Matthews: well i must be not be one of them cause i don't get it
Gloria Borger: Bush is a winner he has until the spring of 2008 the surge is working!!!
Matthews: Bush sez it's all about Al Qeada
Mike Duffy: Bush sez we fight them there so we don't fight them here -- but if we beat them won't they come here?
Matthews: it's like ants at a picnic just you have some in one place doesn’t mean they can’t be on you’re blanket too
Duffy: hell some Iraqis say if we leave they could kill al qaeda
Matthws: david yur a novelist thrill us with your acumen
Ignatius: no your all wrong it's all Bin Laden if we leave Iraq it's a defeat for America we can never leave we must kill all Muslims everywhere!!!!!
O'Donnell: you're making Bush's argument
Ignatius: I know i luv him
Matthews: what if we leave???
Duffy: no one wants to talk about this but omg the price of oil could up!!!!
Matthews: who should we kill?
Duffy: better kill everyone just to be safe
Matthews: so do we leave?
Ignatius: they've abandoned Maliki and the Parliament they’re turning to a a small group of power brokers they're like the Bobbleheads of Iraq
Borger: can i talk?
Matthews: if you must
Borger: Democrats hate America
Matthews: we are leaving aren't we?
Duffy: yes but we have to be like George Costanza and leave on a high note
Matthews: remember Gary Hart and Dean wow those doods were really crazy Barack Obama is looking to my really best buddy Ronald Reagan
Obama: we rise and fall together
Ignatius: i luv it!!!!!!
Matthews: ooh i'm so excited Obama hit Hillary and now she's calling him naive and he sez she's Bush-lite
Ignatius: ha ha ha i luv it!!!!
Matthews: this is so fucking awesome!
Ignatius: there's a real difference here he wants to make luv not war and she says lets fight
Borger: let me references Bobblespeaking on a Bobblespeak show
Matthews: HA HA Ha i luv it he called Obama a Holocaust Denier!!!
Duffy: this is the most important moment because he's young and she's the experienced candidate
Borger: well she is better than him
Matthews: better at what -- voting for crazy wars?
Borger: i have absolutely no idea i'm an idiot
Matthews: why do i have you on then?
Borger: because no one channels cocktail party chatter like me
Ignatius: if things get much worse in Iraq it will be good for Hillary since she voted for the war
Matthews: Gonzalez lied
O'Donnell: Bush sez no it's complicated -- besides lying isn't a bad thing anymore
Matthews: unbelievable
Panel: he's not going anywhere
Matthews: how do we get rid of this guy?
Ignatius: if he's late picking up Dick Cheney's dry cleaning
The McLaughlin Group - July 29, 2007
**********************************************************
The McLaughlin Group - July 29, 2007
**********************************************************
McLaughlin: Hilary is more naive than Obama because she voted for the war
Buchanan: that's right i think Obama is the winner but they're going to show Obama in campaign ads meeting with Holocaust deniers
Clift: this is a silly debate their positions are the same but it shows how sharp Hillary is and how Obama can hit back
McLaughin: the 9/11 Commission said we should meet with the enemies
Blankley: Kennedy and Clinton caused the Cuban Missile Crisis cause of liberal weakness
McL: but she's the establishment candidate
O'Donnell: Hillary got the media on her side but then Obama won the liberal base
Buchanan: she wants to stop the debate because Obama got the upper hand
McLaughlin: so won this battle?
Buchanan: the whole thing benefits Obama because he's the one who is behind
Blankley: they both win
Buchnan: Obama is the winner in the second round
Clift: its a tie
Blankely: she wins this one
O'Donnell: sort of a tie -- Bush is the real looser
[ break ]
Specter: Gonzalez i think you're a liar and i'm the one who thought up the single bullet theory
Buchanan: We're stuck with Abu because Himmler couldn't get confirmed
Clift: this is bad a Constitutional crisis is looming
McLaughlin: Card and Abu threatened to pull the plug on Ashcroft so they could get permission to break the law
Mueller: Abu lied
Comey: these are evil people
Blankley: well it's a gun and there's some smoke coming out of the barrel i have to admit it's pretty bad
McL: Bush told him to torture Ashcroft
Blankely: that's true but it's admirable
O'Donnell: Bush is stubborn and stupid
Clift: they're liars too
Buchanan: Bush is not acting on principle he's just an asshole he gave Congress the Italian Salute
McL: Bush has come full circle he's into Complete Victory!!!
O'Donnell: it's completely insane
Blankely: first people want an optimistic president and second there's a lot of good news from Iraq
O'Donnell: like what
Blankley: no we took a town this week
O'Donnell: who's "we" kemosabe?
*******************************************************************
The McLaughlin Group - July 29, 2007
**********************************************************
McLaughlin: Hilary is more naive than Obama because she voted for the war
Buchanan: that's right i think Obama is the winner but they're going to show Obama in campaign ads meeting with Holocaust deniers
Clift: this is a silly debate their positions are the same but it shows how sharp Hillary is and how Obama can hit back
McLaughin: the 9/11 Commission said we should meet with the enemies
Blankley: Kennedy and Clinton caused the Cuban Missile Crisis cause of liberal weakness
McL: but she's the establishment candidate
O'Donnell: Hillary got the media on her side but then Obama won the liberal base
Buchanan: she wants to stop the debate because Obama got the upper hand
McLaughlin: so won this battle?
Buchanan: the whole thing benefits Obama because he's the one who is behind
Blankley: they both win
Buchnan: Obama is the winner in the second round
Clift: its a tie
Blankely: she wins this one
O'Donnell: sort of a tie -- Bush is the real looser
[ break ]
Specter: Gonzalez i think you're a liar and i'm the one who thought up the single bullet theory
Buchanan: We're stuck with Abu because Himmler couldn't get confirmed
Clift: this is bad a Constitutional crisis is looming
McLaughlin: Card and Abu threatened to pull the plug on Ashcroft so they could get permission to break the law
Mueller: Abu lied
Comey: these are evil people
Blankley: well it's a gun and there's some smoke coming out of the barrel i have to admit it's pretty bad
McL: Bush told him to torture Ashcroft
Blankely: that's true but it's admirable
O'Donnell: Bush is stubborn and stupid
Clift: they're liars too
Buchanan: Bush is not acting on principle he's just an asshole he gave Congress the Italian Salute
McL: Bush has come full circle he's into Complete Victory!!!
O'Donnell: it's completely insane
Blankely: first people want an optimistic president and second there's a lot of good news from Iraq
O'Donnell: like what
Blankley: no we took a town this week
O'Donnell: who's "we" kemosabe?
*******************************************************************
Hardball - Friday, July 27 2007
*****************************************************************
Hardball, Friday, July 27
Guests: Shelia Jackson Lee, Rep. Cannon
******************************************************************
Tweety: did Abu lie
Jackson-Lee: oh yeah look Mueller knew that they went to the hopsital to threaten to turn off Ashcrofts machines unless he played ball
Tweety: beyond a reasonable doubt
Jackson-Lee: you're trying to trap me dood we need a special prosecutor
Tweety: should Ashcroft testify
Cannon: oh no way it's all totally super secret James Bond stuff!!
Jackson-Lee: was it Terrorist Surveillance Program?
Mueller: um yeah
Jackson-Lee: like what dood
Mueller: i can't tell you
Tweety: is Aleberto a liar?
Cannon: how should i know?
Tweety: why not have Ashcroft testify?
Cannon: no, he might prove Abu a liar
Jackson-Lee: rule of law doods or i swear i will start asking about administration sex lives
Tweety: is Abu stoopid or something?
Cannon: he's too nice
Tweety: what the fuck is wrong with him?
Cannon: i don't know maybe he was dropped on his haid
Tweety: is he a good AG
Cannon: he's just too nice to take on Schumer
Tweety: well how is going to take on Al Qaeda and the Mob dood?
Jackson-Lee: c'mon Alberto went to Harvard all we know now is we are not getting straight answer from him
Cannon: we don't have jurisdiction over the Truth
Tweety: um Congresswoman Bush went to Yale and Harvard and he's a moron
Shelia: dood that's a good point but Bush is White i figured Abu had to be twice as good
Tweety: well there's a scary thought
Tweety: what do you think - did Abu lie?
Cummins: doods we're at war with people who want to kill us and Alberto goes up there and makes no sense at all
Tweety: incompetent?
Cummins: he's a like a bleeding boxer - somebody call this fight
Iglesias: sad and sordid tale he's giving all hispanics a bad name
Tweety: maybe he's just too nice?
Iglesias: oh crap we're at war we need someone as tough as nail or more if yur up against a real man like Diane Feinstein
Tweety: so what now?
Igelsias: independent prosecutor - but that won't happen
Tweety: because they are all crooks
Iglesias: yup
Cummins: there is nothing to stop them from telling the truth right now
Tweety: but then they would have to admit their wrongdoing
Cummins: but we all already know that Iglesias was fired for political reason by now -- they should just admit it and end the scandal
Tweety: Abu a big liar?
Iglesias: frankly yes
Cummins: did i say yes -- i means yes
[ break ]
Tweety: who will win in Iowa?
Joe Trippi: i dunno
Tweety: its gotta be Edwards or yur guy is dead
Trippi: that's exactly right
Tweety: then he wins Florida
Trippi: what a silly spat Obama and Hillary are in it's mostly Hillary's fault
Tweety: would Edwards have Fidel killed?
Trippi: minimum wage dood!
Tweety: oh no i'm very scared Obama will give in to the enemey and surrender Nantucket to the islamic horde
Trippi: teh name calling is stoopid
Tweety: this is important i'm really scared but then again i just realized hate bush too
Trippi: call down dood they're just trying to win the primary
Tweety: bash hillary please
Trippi: I don't want to get sucked into this dood
Tweety: but you're running third
Trippi: yeah but the strategy now is to let the two of them attack each other and swoop in and be the nice guy above it all and win!!
Tweety: i love it good luck
Tweety: why did she give Obama the title shot
Hanretty: the Clintons are trying to take down the guy who's running second it's simple
Tweety: wow tough
Hanretty: the tag of naive is devastating
Shrum: interesting debate she thought she would have it wrapped up and Obama can't back down even if he really did regret what he said
Tweety: wrap it up for me
Shrum: Obama the Unready and Hillary the Bush-Lite
Tweety: fair or unfair with the Holocaust denier thing?
Shrum: look Hillary's people are scared of Obama
Hanretty: Obama lost Florida when he said he would gay marry Fidel Castro
Shrum: every schoolchild knows about that whole Florida thing but look even Bush wants to talk to iran
Tweety: she's always so careful its fascinating
Tony Snow: dood sure he lied but try and prove it
Kornblut: The Bush White House is enjoying watching Abu being tortured he's like a Presidential Michael Vick
Fein: remember Nixon he's a crook
Tweety: what crime did Bush commit?
Fein: he violated FISA
Tweety: well then you can't prove it so why should we investigate???
Burnett: that's a great point without proof beyond a reasonable doubt how can you charge someone it's black letter law
Tweety: is it Bush's fault the Dow sux?
Burnett: ha ha i like cocktail weenies too much to answer that
Tweety: who is lying?
Kornblut: don't say that Tweety that's uncivil
Fein: they violated the FISA act and the American people get it
Tweety: no you're wrong people get perjury because it's lying who's heard of FISA???
Fein: yeah but personal privacy!!
Tweety: i hate bad guyz
*************************************************************** |
Hardball, Friday, July 27
Guests: Shelia Jackson Lee, Rep. Cannon
******************************************************************
Tweety: did Abu lie
Jackson-Lee: oh yeah look Mueller knew that they went to the hopsital to threaten to turn off Ashcrofts machines unless he played ball
Tweety: beyond a reasonable doubt
Jackson-Lee: you're trying to trap me dood we need a special prosecutor
Tweety: should Ashcroft testify
Cannon: oh no way it's all totally super secret James Bond stuff!!
Jackson-Lee: was it Terrorist Surveillance Program?
Mueller: um yeah
Jackson-Lee: like what dood
Mueller: i can't tell you
Tweety: is Aleberto a liar?
Cannon: how should i know?
Tweety: why not have Ashcroft testify?
Cannon: no, he might prove Abu a liar
Jackson-Lee: rule of law doods or i swear i will start asking about administration sex lives
Tweety: is Abu stoopid or something?
Cannon: he's too nice
Tweety: what the fuck is wrong with him?
Cannon: i don't know maybe he was dropped on his haid
Tweety: is he a good AG
Cannon: he's just too nice to take on Schumer
Tweety: well how is going to take on Al Qaeda and the Mob dood?
Jackson-Lee: c'mon Alberto went to Harvard all we know now is we are not getting straight answer from him
Cannon: we don't have jurisdiction over the Truth
Tweety: um Congresswoman Bush went to Yale and Harvard and he's a moron
Shelia: dood that's a good point but Bush is White i figured Abu had to be twice as good
Tweety: well there's a scary thought
Tweety: what do you think - did Abu lie?
Cummins: doods we're at war with people who want to kill us and Alberto goes up there and makes no sense at all
Tweety: incompetent?
Cummins: he's a like a bleeding boxer - somebody call this fight
Iglesias: sad and sordid tale he's giving all hispanics a bad name
Tweety: maybe he's just too nice?
Iglesias: oh crap we're at war we need someone as tough as nail or more if yur up against a real man like Diane Feinstein
Tweety: so what now?
Igelsias: independent prosecutor - but that won't happen
Tweety: because they are all crooks
Iglesias: yup
Cummins: there is nothing to stop them from telling the truth right now
Tweety: but then they would have to admit their wrongdoing
Cummins: but we all already know that Iglesias was fired for political reason by now -- they should just admit it and end the scandal
Tweety: Abu a big liar?
Iglesias: frankly yes
Cummins: did i say yes -- i means yes
[ break ]
Tweety: who will win in Iowa?
Joe Trippi: i dunno
Tweety: its gotta be Edwards or yur guy is dead
Trippi: that's exactly right
Tweety: then he wins Florida
Trippi: what a silly spat Obama and Hillary are in it's mostly Hillary's fault
Tweety: would Edwards have Fidel killed?
Trippi: minimum wage dood!
Tweety: oh no i'm very scared Obama will give in to the enemey and surrender Nantucket to the islamic horde
Trippi: teh name calling is stoopid
Tweety: this is important i'm really scared but then again i just realized hate bush too
Trippi: call down dood they're just trying to win the primary
Tweety: bash hillary please
Trippi: I don't want to get sucked into this dood
Tweety: but you're running third
Trippi: yeah but the strategy now is to let the two of them attack each other and swoop in and be the nice guy above it all and win!!
Tweety: i love it good luck
Tweety: why did she give Obama the title shot
Hanretty: the Clintons are trying to take down the guy who's running second it's simple
Tweety: wow tough
Hanretty: the tag of naive is devastating
Shrum: interesting debate she thought she would have it wrapped up and Obama can't back down even if he really did regret what he said
Tweety: wrap it up for me
Shrum: Obama the Unready and Hillary the Bush-Lite
Tweety: fair or unfair with the Holocaust denier thing?
Shrum: look Hillary's people are scared of Obama
Hanretty: Obama lost Florida when he said he would gay marry Fidel Castro
Shrum: every schoolchild knows about that whole Florida thing but look even Bush wants to talk to iran
Tweety: she's always so careful its fascinating
Tony Snow: dood sure he lied but try and prove it
Kornblut: The Bush White House is enjoying watching Abu being tortured he's like a Presidential Michael Vick
Fein: remember Nixon he's a crook
Tweety: what crime did Bush commit?
Fein: he violated FISA
Tweety: well then you can't prove it so why should we investigate???
Burnett: that's a great point without proof beyond a reasonable doubt how can you charge someone it's black letter law
Tweety: is it Bush's fault the Dow sux?
Burnett: ha ha i like cocktail weenies too much to answer that
Tweety: who is lying?
Kornblut: don't say that Tweety that's uncivil
Fein: they violated the FISA act and the American people get it
Tweety: no you're wrong people get perjury because it's lying who's heard of FISA???
Fein: yeah but personal privacy!!
Tweety: i hate bad guyz
*************************************************************** |
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Democratic Debate - July 23, 2007
Dennis Kucinich wants to create a Department of Peace
********************************************************
Democratic Debate - July 23, 2007
CNN / YouTube
The Citadel
(Note: Partial transcript)
********************************************************
Q: Kucinich, yur a freak so why should we vote for u
Kucinich: dood i always opposed this now don't get me wrong, i like war as much as anyone, and duty and honor and all that but my motto is Strength Thru Peace, baby
[applause]
Clinton: Democrats are totally united behind me and my pink outfit -- not the Keebler Elf. Do u know I have been an instument of change for 35 years!
[scattered applause]
Obama: dood the Democrats are to blame too that's why i don't take PAC money -- i totally rock
Q: hillary r u a liberal?
Hillary: it used to mean u were in favor of freedom in the 19th century but i'm not a liberal i'm an American-Modern-Progressive it's kind of Whitman-meets-Twain-Meets-William Jennings Bryant thing
Gravel: let's talk about Obama he took $$$ from Robert Wuhl and he sucked in "Batman" and "Good Morning Vietnam"
Obama: dood i passed a law against this while you were sitting around watching Matlock reruns
Q: Biden, which Republicans do you like?
[applause]
Biden: i like Chuck Hagel and name Dick Lugar Sec. of State
Anderson: he said name on person dood
Biden: you know that bill called the Clinton crime bill, well I call it the Biden Crime Bill
Anderson: how bizarre
Edwards: you can't negotiate with the insurance companies we have crush in the infame!!
[ applause!!! ]
Q: John Edwards, are we ever going to get reparations for slavery?
Edwards: no of course not dood but look at other issues like why do low and high income blacks pay more for mortgages is Malcom X Blvd. that nice i don't think so
Obama: no but what about investment in teh schools?
[ big applause ]
the kids are still living in the civil war era classrooms and thats a Corridor of Shame
Kucinich: yes and no i will take this opportunity to talk and say yes but really no it's all about defense contractors wait on second thought yes I am in favor of reparations!
Q: what would have happened in Katrina had hit Greenwich CT dood?
Dodd: oh you know it would have been way different hopefully that would not happen again - you know, on second thought we should have been ready before the hurricane hit!
Anderson C: but dood the mayor is a democrat doesn't that make Bush a hero
Richardson: no way you know Bush is a fucking sociopath who strummed while the city was destroyed
Q: barack r u really black?
Obama: when i tried to catch a cab in New York trust me I'm black
Anderson: well dood that's hard for everyone
Obama: uh huh anyway obviously i'm black but if you want to solve the race problem give people equal opportunity otherwise just give up
Clinton: well i know what i am i am woman hear me roar and damm proud of it
Anderson: sing it sister
Clinton: look Bill is hispanic and Obama is black and I'm female and let's face there's more of me than of them
Edwards: i speak for everyone on this stage when i say i don't want the racists to vote for me
Obama: that's true
Edwards: raise the minimum wage that will help more women than electing Hillary
Anderson: diss Elizabeth please
Hilllary: oh don't go there Andy i was in Bejing in front of the tanks advocating for women and everyone knows that -- hell i moved to fucking Arkansas now there's a damm sacrifice
Q (Brooklyn Lesbians): gay marriage doods
Dennis: Yes! and you know why? cause Lesbians are hot! No I'm just kidding it's about human rights!
Dodd: um, well, see, I have 2 daughters and if they grew up to be lesbians i would want them to be able to not be married
Richardson: no because people hate gays if i were president i couldn't do anything about that
Q: how can u use religion to deny gay americans equal rights doods
Edwards: i'm conflicted because i know discrimination is wrong but my church and my desire to be elected tell me it's ok
Anderson: did he answer yur question
Rev: yeah but not the answer i wanted
Edwards: i don't like gays but i won't use my beliefs to discriminate
Obama: i like civil unions that would be equality under the law as far as marriage goes that's for the church to decide
Coop-man: dood that makes no sense now let's watch a movie
Q: will u save Darfur?
Richardson: i've been to Darfur i would be very aggressive - - use diplomacy, ask China to be nice also the UN should send it's massive army
Andy C: no fly zone?
Richardson: maybe
Andy: US soldiers?
Bill: no big scary permanent muslim UN Troops
Hillary: no fly zone and sanctions
Andy C: US army troops?
Hillary: no UN troops and African troops dammit we can't even find Osama
Anderson: 12 Citadel grads have been killed in Afghanistan and Iraq did u know that
[ applause!!!! ]
Anderson C: damm i am so fucking cool
Biden: goddammit Bill you're full of crap we should send troops right now - don't laugh at me i'm not kidding - we can save them if we want to only 2,500 troops would do it
Gravel: we need to establish a Global Government and it's sad that African countries don't like us
Anderson: shut up old man
Q: i hated the US invasion of Iraq but the country is newborn little baby what if Russia goes in????
Obama: jeez what a loon obviously i was right this war was a mistake from the beginning if it's too hot for the Iraqi legislature then dammit the American troops can leave for the summer too
Biden: i'm the only one who has offered a solution - that is split the country into three pieces
[ applause ]
Q: how many soldiers will die so Dems can avoid the label that you're weak on defense
Hillary: look we're trying to win Republican support for a pullout -- i asked the Pentagon for the plan to leave and they said i was unpatriotic
Kucinich: simple solution stop funding the war that's it!!
Dodd: we're trying to convince the wackos in Iraq to shape up and they only way to do it is pass a bill telling them to
Richardson: pull all troops out by the end of 2007 - like now
Q: did the troops in Vietnam really die in vain
Gravel: yes all the troops in Vietnam died in vain i was in Hanoi and someone bought me ice cream it was delicious
Cooper: dood that was the Juneau Food Court
Obama: i opposed the war and Hillary and Edwards were in favor of it so suck it
Edwards: we have to force George Bush to change course somehow
Q: Should women register for the draft?
Dodd: absolutely you never know when rivets will pop out
Hillary: sure they should women are serving in Iraq so yeah we may have to draft them
Andy: interesting
Hillary: build a public service academy you know like a female Citadel but with pillow fights
Obama: i luv Tuskeegee airman so yes
Edwards: chicks who fly F-16s are awesome
Gravel: i fillbustered to end the draft in World War One Eugene Debs brought me coffee and emma goldman knit me some pajamas
Q: Arabs states hate girlz so why should u be President
Hillary: because dood i will be the President of the Fucking United States of Kicking Ass and Taking Names and if you want to fuck with me just try it
Andy: wow u r scary
Q: will u meet with the leaders of the Scary Bad Countries
Obama: damm right i would why not Reagan met with teh Commies
Q: Hillary answer the Scary Man question
Hillary: unlike naive Obama i will not promise to meet with these doods i mean why meet with Castro for god's sake
Edwards: what she said
Q: when will we pull all the troopz out of iraq
Dodd: all i can say is i will try to pull out beginning in Jan. 2009
Cooper: so all troops out by Jan 21 2009
Dood: no u idiot i won't be President until then
Richardson: i'm better because i say all troops out before then
Biden: god you are stupid you can't get the troops out in less than six months when i go to iraq i get shot at and that's just by our troops
Andy C: wow
Biden: how do we protect the civilians did you ever even think about this
Hillary: i have a three point plan but Joe is right i have done a lot of this but this whole conversation is stupid the Democrats are not in charge and the Pentagon is not even planning for it so Bill Richardson will you please shut the fuck up
Q: who's yur favorite teacher
Gravel: Horace Mann saw something this young whippersnapper he gave me a slate and taught me the alphabet
Obama: a kenyan lady taught me about teh Circle of Life
Biden: i had a teacher who told me i should president and he was right
Q: No Child Left Behind?
Richardson: get rid of it, it sux it punishes schools for not doing well it's stupid
Biden: i voted for it cause ted kennedy got me drunk one night
Q: Public or Private School
Edwards: all my kids went to public school
Hillary: look Chelsea went to public schools until Bill was the fucking President you schmuck
Obama: it's irrelvant there are fine public schools but there are alos a lot of crappy ones and Senators have a choice but poor people don't always have one
Gravel: let the schools compete like Battle of the Network Stars remember when Jack Benny beat Ed Sullivan!!?
Q: Sex education for your kids
Edwards: my wife is really old you know she was in AARP
Cooper: cool
Edwards: we talk about "wrong touching"
Andy: eeeewww too much
Obama: mitt romney is moron and hypocrite it's all about sexual predators
Q: Al Gore is going to run?
Biden: look I made a humorous quip!
********************************************************
Dennis Kucinich: Would Create Department of Peace
********************************************************
Barack Obama: Is He Black Enough?
**************************************************************
Hillary Clinton: She Smiles. She Laughs. Do Not Fuck With Her.
**************************************************************
Mike Gravel: Filibustered the Draft in 1917 - Eugene Debs Got Him Coffee
******************************************************************
John Edwards: He's Ready For His Close Up
******************************************************************
Joe Biden: Yoko Ono of Foreign Policy - Wants to Break Up Iraq
*******************************************************************
Chris Dodd: Suspects His Daughters May Be Lesbians
********************************************************************
Bill Richardson: It's OK, He's From *New* Mexico
****************************************************************************
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Meet the Press - July 22, 2007
*****************************************************
Meet the Press - July 22, 2007
Guests:
Mike McConnell, Director of National Intelligence
U.S. Senator Russ Feingold
*****************************************************
Russert: ok Mike what should we panic about right now!!!???
Mike McConnell: mass casualties and attacks on vital economic structures - for example they might attack a Wal-Mart
Russert: do they have nukes
McConnell: no but they have access to lighters and blowtorches
Russert: why haven't we been attacked recently
McConnell: cause we have daily conference calls where we discuss new and innovative ways to deliver a mass beat down on muslim ass
Russert: are there sleeper cells here to kill our blond-haired and blue-eyed women?
McConnell: we're not sure so we've put every brown person under surveillance
Russert: your report says Al Qaeda is back and bigger and better than ever!
McConnell: Pakistan appeased Osama bin Laden and gosh darn it now they have a safe haven when Bush heard about it he said well H E double hockey sticks!!
Russert: why can't you capture Osama
McConnell: in my vast experience in intelligence it's easier to find something big like a mountain or aircraft carrier or elephant or something
Russert: could we trade Musharraf for Osama and some draft picks
McConnell: well Bush has named Musharraf a franchise player so we would want at least an all-star, but we feel that Osama's injuries make him less desirable
Russert: is he dead or alive
McConnell: if we get a video we'll have Frist make a diagnosis and get back to you
Russert: do we torture
McConnell: oh heavens to betsy no Bush has ordered that all accounts of torture be labeled aberrations and low level people be punished
Russert: waterboarding yes or no
McConnell: dood i can't give away our best stuff some of it is really cool though
Russert: these are all known terrorists
McConnell: yes and they had information that we really need like how to get the hell out of iraq
Russert: what other secrets do they have
McConnell: one guy knew how the new harry potter book ended
Russert: you should use the Cruciatus Curse
McConnell: don’t think we haven’t tried everything
Russert: but we don’t torture
McConnell: riiiight
[winks at Russert]
McConnell: plus they knew our country’s reputation for torturing people in ghastly ways so they confess before we even get a chance to torture them
Russert: wow score one for the United States of America
McConnell: there is an element of extremism that goes from the Levant to South Africa
Russert: scary
McConnell: AQ has united all these groups of people who hate America
Russert: and now they're active in Iraq when they weren't before
McConnell: that's true but the schools have freshly painted rubble
Russert: which is worse al qaeda or sectarian violence
McConnell: well there is some hot sunni on sunni action but mostly Shia vs. Sunni
Russert: not Al Qaeda? what about what Bush said
McConnell: Al Qaeda is part of sectrarian violence they are committing crimes - why they even ripped the tags off their mattresses
Russert: according the new book you said Bush politicized intelligence - true?
McConnell: right you can't decide what result you want and then go looking for it
Russert: but it's all better now
McConnell: yes it's so refreshing Cheney wants to me to speak truth to power
[ Russert spits out coffee ]
Russert: dood are you talking about Dick Cheney??
McConnell: Saddam killed 300,000 people and then his generals lied to Bush which is just outrageous
Russert: r u hyping intelligence?
McConnell: no cherry picking we're giving it to em straight
Russert: if you say so dood
[ break ]
Russert: Russ Feingold can u end the war
Russ Feingold: a Senate majority just voted to end the war this was my idea and when I first had it it was crazy now i've been vindicated
Russert: well you're a democrat that's your role in life
Feingold: i don't like you Tim Russert
Russert: reporters say if we leave it will be total chaos
Feingold: we've got to get the other countries involved in stabilizing iraq
Russert: what if the whole country explodes!!!
Feingold: dood the US is the cause of instability
Russert: bush wants to stay isn't he right
Feingold: the people of America voted in November to pull out of Iraq so naturally one year later we will be debating how big the troop increase should be
Russert: what are you going to do about it tough guy
Feingold: censure the President and Cheney for the Iraq war, corruption, the illegality…
Russert: don't you suck
Feingold: heck i won the wiretapping battle didn't i
Russert: why do you hate our fine president
Feingold: oh no this is a middle ground course heck most americans want to see Bush impeached
Russert: will right wing wackos like Joe Lieberman vote for it
Feingold: i seriously doubt it but more moderate Republicans like Gordon Brown and Vlad Dracul have expressed interest
[ break ]
Russert: Feingold can't talk sense into Bush
Bob Woodward: what are you going to Bush is the dictator
David Brooks: Bush is amazing he still loves apple pie and democracy and thinks god speaks to him every day
Russert: but Bush lied to get us into war
Brooks: there are alot of Serious Debates in DC right now about how we can avoid admitting the hippies were right
Russert: censure Bush?
Brooks: that would be a big mistake for the Democrats there are some Republicans who are desperate to get away from Bush and this won't let them do that
Russert: um dood i think that's kind of the point
Russert: Cheney is deranged isn't he
Stephen Hayes: last year we had al qeada on the run which proves Bush was right and now that it's stronger than ever that proves Cheney was right
Russert: last throes?
Hayes: yeah he admitted that was wrong given the glaring reality
Russert: he has no doubts
Hayes: no he's right even when he's wrong
Woodward: with due respect to the moron to my right Iraq isn't a Theological Serious Debate it's a fucking war and people are being killed every day
Brooks: dood i suffer to why the other day i got an unripe olive in my martini
Woodward: there is no realistic solution it's up to the rational Republicans to talk sense to Bush
Brooks: i fear 250,000 Iraqis will be killed it's very frustrating to me to watch the debate in DC no one seems to understand Iraq like i do
Russert: when the fuck did you become an expert on the middle east Bobo???
Brooks: are we willing to let 125 US soldiers die every month to save 10,000 Iraqis a month
Hayes: genocide - it’s the new talking point
Woodward: where the fuck did you get the number 10,000 Iraqi lives saved or lost or whatever
Brooks: John Burns and the NIE
Woodward: what a lie my god you are truly full of shit
Brooks: no they said genocide
[ waves hands wildly ]
Woodward: where did you get that number
[Brooks gets up on table takes off his pants and underwear, turns his back to Woodward]
Brooks: here i pulled them out of my ass! Are u happy now dood!?!?
Russert: Bobo please sit down this isn’t Nantucket
Russert: is Cheney an evil psychopath or a deranged villain
Hayes: he's the polar opposite of the cliche he's secretive and works the levers of power
Russert: dood that is the cliche
Hayes: oh
Brooks: it's sad that there is a back channel of power in the White House
Woodward: blame your stupid President moron
Brooks: hey i resent that
Woodward: i can't believe that i - a titan of american journalism - has to share a table with the man who parlayed 'bobos in paradise' into alleged elite iraq punditry
Brooks: i can too talk gud
Woodward: go fuck yourself brooksie before i call mark felt and have you killed
**************************************************************
Meet the Press - July 22, 2007
Guests:
Mike McConnell, Director of National Intelligence
U.S. Senator Russ Feingold
*****************************************************
Russert: ok Mike what should we panic about right now!!!???
Mike McConnell: mass casualties and attacks on vital economic structures - for example they might attack a Wal-Mart
Russert: do they have nukes
McConnell: no but they have access to lighters and blowtorches
Russert: why haven't we been attacked recently
McConnell: cause we have daily conference calls where we discuss new and innovative ways to deliver a mass beat down on muslim ass
Russert: are there sleeper cells here to kill our blond-haired and blue-eyed women?
McConnell: we're not sure so we've put every brown person under surveillance
Russert: your report says Al Qaeda is back and bigger and better than ever!
McConnell: Pakistan appeased Osama bin Laden and gosh darn it now they have a safe haven when Bush heard about it he said well H E double hockey sticks!!
Russert: why can't you capture Osama
McConnell: in my vast experience in intelligence it's easier to find something big like a mountain or aircraft carrier or elephant or something
Russert: could we trade Musharraf for Osama and some draft picks
McConnell: well Bush has named Musharraf a franchise player so we would want at least an all-star, but we feel that Osama's injuries make him less desirable
Russert: is he dead or alive
McConnell: if we get a video we'll have Frist make a diagnosis and get back to you
Russert: do we torture
McConnell: oh heavens to betsy no Bush has ordered that all accounts of torture be labeled aberrations and low level people be punished
Russert: waterboarding yes or no
McConnell: dood i can't give away our best stuff some of it is really cool though
Russert: these are all known terrorists
McConnell: yes and they had information that we really need like how to get the hell out of iraq
Russert: what other secrets do they have
McConnell: one guy knew how the new harry potter book ended
Russert: you should use the Cruciatus Curse
McConnell: don’t think we haven’t tried everything
Russert: but we don’t torture
McConnell: riiiight
[winks at Russert]
McConnell: plus they knew our country’s reputation for torturing people in ghastly ways so they confess before we even get a chance to torture them
Russert: wow score one for the United States of America
McConnell: there is an element of extremism that goes from the Levant to South Africa
Russert: scary
McConnell: AQ has united all these groups of people who hate America
Russert: and now they're active in Iraq when they weren't before
McConnell: that's true but the schools have freshly painted rubble
Russert: which is worse al qaeda or sectarian violence
McConnell: well there is some hot sunni on sunni action but mostly Shia vs. Sunni
Russert: not Al Qaeda? what about what Bush said
McConnell: Al Qaeda is part of sectrarian violence they are committing crimes - why they even ripped the tags off their mattresses
Russert: according the new book you said Bush politicized intelligence - true?
McConnell: right you can't decide what result you want and then go looking for it
Russert: but it's all better now
McConnell: yes it's so refreshing Cheney wants to me to speak truth to power
[ Russert spits out coffee ]
Russert: dood are you talking about Dick Cheney??
McConnell: Saddam killed 300,000 people and then his generals lied to Bush which is just outrageous
Russert: r u hyping intelligence?
McConnell: no cherry picking we're giving it to em straight
Russert: if you say so dood
[ break ]
Russert: Russ Feingold can u end the war
Russ Feingold: a Senate majority just voted to end the war this was my idea and when I first had it it was crazy now i've been vindicated
Russert: well you're a democrat that's your role in life
Feingold: i don't like you Tim Russert
Russert: reporters say if we leave it will be total chaos
Feingold: we've got to get the other countries involved in stabilizing iraq
Russert: what if the whole country explodes!!!
Feingold: dood the US is the cause of instability
Russert: bush wants to stay isn't he right
Feingold: the people of America voted in November to pull out of Iraq so naturally one year later we will be debating how big the troop increase should be
Russert: what are you going to do about it tough guy
Feingold: censure the President and Cheney for the Iraq war, corruption, the illegality…
Russert: don't you suck
Feingold: heck i won the wiretapping battle didn't i
Russert: why do you hate our fine president
Feingold: oh no this is a middle ground course heck most americans want to see Bush impeached
Russert: will right wing wackos like Joe Lieberman vote for it
Feingold: i seriously doubt it but more moderate Republicans like Gordon Brown and Vlad Dracul have expressed interest
[ break ]
Russert: Feingold can't talk sense into Bush
Bob Woodward: what are you going to Bush is the dictator
David Brooks: Bush is amazing he still loves apple pie and democracy and thinks god speaks to him every day
Russert: but Bush lied to get us into war
Brooks: there are alot of Serious Debates in DC right now about how we can avoid admitting the hippies were right
Russert: censure Bush?
Brooks: that would be a big mistake for the Democrats there are some Republicans who are desperate to get away from Bush and this won't let them do that
Russert: um dood i think that's kind of the point
Russert: Cheney is deranged isn't he
Stephen Hayes: last year we had al qeada on the run which proves Bush was right and now that it's stronger than ever that proves Cheney was right
Russert: last throes?
Hayes: yeah he admitted that was wrong given the glaring reality
Russert: he has no doubts
Hayes: no he's right even when he's wrong
Woodward: with due respect to the moron to my right Iraq isn't a Theological Serious Debate it's a fucking war and people are being killed every day
Brooks: dood i suffer to why the other day i got an unripe olive in my martini
Woodward: there is no realistic solution it's up to the rational Republicans to talk sense to Bush
Brooks: i fear 250,000 Iraqis will be killed it's very frustrating to me to watch the debate in DC no one seems to understand Iraq like i do
Russert: when the fuck did you become an expert on the middle east Bobo???
Brooks: are we willing to let 125 US soldiers die every month to save 10,000 Iraqis a month
Hayes: genocide - it’s the new talking point
Woodward: where the fuck did you get the number 10,000 Iraqi lives saved or lost or whatever
Brooks: John Burns and the NIE
Woodward: what a lie my god you are truly full of shit
Brooks: no they said genocide
[ waves hands wildly ]
Woodward: where did you get that number
[Brooks gets up on table takes off his pants and underwear, turns his back to Woodward]
Brooks: here i pulled them out of my ass! Are u happy now dood!?!?
Russert: Bobo please sit down this isn’t Nantucket
Russert: is Cheney an evil psychopath or a deranged villain
Hayes: he's the polar opposite of the cliche he's secretive and works the levers of power
Russert: dood that is the cliche
Hayes: oh
Brooks: it's sad that there is a back channel of power in the White House
Woodward: blame your stupid President moron
Brooks: hey i resent that
Woodward: i can't believe that i - a titan of american journalism - has to share a table with the man who parlayed 'bobos in paradise' into alleged elite iraq punditry
Brooks: i can too talk gud
Woodward: go fuck yourself brooksie before i call mark felt and have you killed
**************************************************************
The Chris Matthews Show - July 22, 2007
**********************************************
The Chris Matthews Show - July 22, 2007
**********************************************
Chris Matthews: Republicans are in total collapse because the Iraq war like Fred Thompson who says he never knew there were other countries until 9/11
David Gregory: unlike Karl Rove i am an expert on Iraq and Bush will reduce troops levels just enough to really put them in even more danger
Katty Kay: looks u idiots bush is still stupid and insane he'll never ever leave Iraq
Chris Matthews: should Rudy show up at all events covered in the dust of dead people?
John Heilemann: yes he's got to be offensive
Gregory: the next president should use business clichés going forward
Matthews: how can my favorite political party succeed
Cynthia Tucker: Republicans should bash the war and then call Democrats traitors to feed the base
Matthews: the right wing base aren't couch potatoes they want to win the war!!
Heilman: they have to run as kindler, gentler cryptofascists
Kay: reducing to 90,000 troops will just be disastrous
Gregory: look we have to keep 50,000 troops there to prevent Iraq from crumbling!
Matthews: awesome
Gregory: Obama has some good ideas too bad he's a dirty liberal i hope Mitt adopts his policies
Heilman: we should leave Iraq
Gregory: no we have to stay i luv this war!!!
Matthews: like my daddy used to say in or out i'm not paying to heat the whole neighborhood!!!
Gregory: America must turn to the Republicans for national security god i hope they do
Cynthia Tucker: they must distance themselves from Bush
Matthews: oh no what if Bill and Hillary become co-presidents!!!???
[ shows long film clip ]
Matthews: the Vice President is gonna be like Vern in "Stand By Me"
Kay: oh i see a chubby loser kid everyone else made fun and who was desperate to be let into the cool kids club house -- gee who does that remind of chris???
Cynthia Tucker: heh heh good one Katty
Matthews: this is amazing bill is comfortable endorsing Hillary even though she's a girl
Tucker: she's walking a tightrope like Obama on race they're the Wallendas of Politics
Matthews: what's wrong with her
Tucker: she's cold and unfeeling
Matthews: this is weird how can a woman be independent from her husband this would never would have happened in the 50s
Kay: dood if u think that's scary look at Edwards his wife has got him on a short leash
Gregory: dood Bill’s the former President anyone would have trouble getting out from under his shadow
Tucker: but he's an amazing campaigner al gore should have used him
Matthews: will america elected los dos equis teh double XX
Kay: no the polls only they say that because people lie
Tucker: women don't always like women
Gregory: i disagree women like women they just don't like this woman
Matthews: tell me something i don't know
Kay: PM Brown dumped the phrase ‘war on terror’ and ‘muslim’ even though we've had attacks because he's all about the love
Gregory: i hope hillary tells the dirty hippies fuck off
Heilman: daniel pearl's family doesn't believe the official version big surprise
Tucker: US crime wave good news for Republicans
Kay: you mean the ones they not actually committing?
Matthews: oooh i hope Fred Thompson runs
Tucker: it's so crazy it just might work
Heilemann: Thompson will get in the race in September and out by November
Matthews: wow it's a campaign not sweeps week
*****************************************************
The Chris Matthews Show - July 22, 2007
**********************************************
Chris Matthews: Republicans are in total collapse because the Iraq war like Fred Thompson who says he never knew there were other countries until 9/11
David Gregory: unlike Karl Rove i am an expert on Iraq and Bush will reduce troops levels just enough to really put them in even more danger
Katty Kay: looks u idiots bush is still stupid and insane he'll never ever leave Iraq
Chris Matthews: should Rudy show up at all events covered in the dust of dead people?
John Heilemann: yes he's got to be offensive
Gregory: the next president should use business clichés going forward
Matthews: how can my favorite political party succeed
Cynthia Tucker: Republicans should bash the war and then call Democrats traitors to feed the base
Matthews: the right wing base aren't couch potatoes they want to win the war!!
Heilman: they have to run as kindler, gentler cryptofascists
Kay: reducing to 90,000 troops will just be disastrous
Gregory: look we have to keep 50,000 troops there to prevent Iraq from crumbling!
Matthews: awesome
Gregory: Obama has some good ideas too bad he's a dirty liberal i hope Mitt adopts his policies
Heilman: we should leave Iraq
Gregory: no we have to stay i luv this war!!!
Matthews: like my daddy used to say in or out i'm not paying to heat the whole neighborhood!!!
Gregory: America must turn to the Republicans for national security god i hope they do
Cynthia Tucker: they must distance themselves from Bush
Matthews: oh no what if Bill and Hillary become co-presidents!!!???
[ shows long film clip ]
Matthews: the Vice President is gonna be like Vern in "Stand By Me"
Kay: oh i see a chubby loser kid everyone else made fun and who was desperate to be let into the cool kids club house -- gee who does that remind of chris???
Cynthia Tucker: heh heh good one Katty
Matthews: this is amazing bill is comfortable endorsing Hillary even though she's a girl
Tucker: she's walking a tightrope like Obama on race they're the Wallendas of Politics
Matthews: what's wrong with her
Tucker: she's cold and unfeeling
Matthews: this is weird how can a woman be independent from her husband this would never would have happened in the 50s
Kay: dood if u think that's scary look at Edwards his wife has got him on a short leash
Gregory: dood Bill’s the former President anyone would have trouble getting out from under his shadow
Tucker: but he's an amazing campaigner al gore should have used him
Matthews: will america elected los dos equis teh double XX
Kay: no the polls only they say that because people lie
Tucker: women don't always like women
Gregory: i disagree women like women they just don't like this woman
Matthews: tell me something i don't know
Kay: PM Brown dumped the phrase ‘war on terror’ and ‘muslim’ even though we've had attacks because he's all about the love
Gregory: i hope hillary tells the dirty hippies fuck off
Heilman: daniel pearl's family doesn't believe the official version big surprise
Tucker: US crime wave good news for Republicans
Kay: you mean the ones they not actually committing?
Matthews: oooh i hope Fred Thompson runs
Tucker: it's so crazy it just might work
Heilemann: Thompson will get in the race in September and out by November
Matthews: wow it's a campaign not sweeps week
*****************************************************
The McLaughlin Group - July 22, 2007
**************************************************
The McLaughlin Group - July 22, 2007
**************************************************
McLaughlin: all night Senate debate on the war with pizza and cots - who wins???
John Podhoretz: it's a win-win Republicans need to look tough and the Dems need to look like they are trying to end the war
John McLaughlin: but the Dems position is the popular one
Podhoretz: but the Republican party needs to sell the idea that Democrats pulled the rug out from under America's troops it's Rugtosslegende
Tony Blankely: hey 70% the Iraq issue is good for Democrats
Arianna Huffington: look at what happened to John McCain
Podhoretz: that's wrong McCain lost because he has a Bangladeshi baby
McLaughlin: US soldiers in Iraq seem unhappy
Huffington: the media sanitize this war
Blankely: that’s outrageous sure there are a few bad apples in the military but most love America and bush
Eleanor Clift: soldiers are being abused by their country
Blankely: we all know that
McLaughlin: Gates wept for the Lion of Fallujah every evening he writes notes to families saying how much it sucks to be Bush's Sec Def does this piss Bush off
Clift: I don’t think he cares
Pod: that isn't true you bitch
Clift: don't interrupt me asshole
Pod: i will you when you say something defamatory about President
Clift: fuck you dirtbag
Pod: bush cries every night for soldiers
Blankely: he's full of emotion
Clift: look Bush had a meeting with conservative journalists and everyone said how cheerful and upbeat he was
[Podhoertz glares, eyes well up ]
Clift: oh you weren't invited to Bush's little party how sad
[Podhoertz sobs]
McLaughlin: Sen. Vitter caught with hooker
Clift: Vitter is not up until 2010 but the bad news is that we haven't heard the last about Vitter's sins
Podhoertz: the governor once lived with a stripper i love it
Blankley: how does Vitter know that God forgave him cause i use some of that action
Huffington: dood goes on and on about the sanctity of marriage and now this
Blanlely: hey at least it was a woman not a teen boy
McLaughlin: right to privacy?
Podhoertz: no way if he didn't want publicity he shouldn't have chosen a public life and calling that hooker wans't a great idea either
McLaughlin: what about a zone of living your life
Podhoertz: no Vitter is a role model
Huffington: dood good lord for who - the issue is hypocrisy
Blankely: Ted Kennedy once pushed me out of the way at a buffet in DC
McLaughlin: Predictions!
Pod: some scandal brewing a some magazine
Clift: Landrieu is lucky because Vitter has been neutered
Blankely: Obama is in trouble because he wants little kids to have sex
Huffington: Sununu is going to dump Bush
*****************************************************************
The McLaughlin Group - July 22, 2007
**************************************************
McLaughlin: all night Senate debate on the war with pizza and cots - who wins???
John Podhoretz: it's a win-win Republicans need to look tough and the Dems need to look like they are trying to end the war
John McLaughlin: but the Dems position is the popular one
Podhoretz: but the Republican party needs to sell the idea that Democrats pulled the rug out from under America's troops it's Rugtosslegende
Tony Blankely: hey 70% the Iraq issue is good for Democrats
Arianna Huffington: look at what happened to John McCain
Podhoretz: that's wrong McCain lost because he has a Bangladeshi baby
McLaughlin: US soldiers in Iraq seem unhappy
Huffington: the media sanitize this war
Blankely: that’s outrageous sure there are a few bad apples in the military but most love America and bush
Eleanor Clift: soldiers are being abused by their country
Blankely: we all know that
McLaughlin: Gates wept for the Lion of Fallujah every evening he writes notes to families saying how much it sucks to be Bush's Sec Def does this piss Bush off
Clift: I don’t think he cares
Pod: that isn't true you bitch
Clift: don't interrupt me asshole
Pod: i will you when you say something defamatory about President
Clift: fuck you dirtbag
Pod: bush cries every night for soldiers
Blankely: he's full of emotion
Clift: look Bush had a meeting with conservative journalists and everyone said how cheerful and upbeat he was
[Podhoertz glares, eyes well up ]
Clift: oh you weren't invited to Bush's little party how sad
[Podhoertz sobs]
McLaughlin: Sen. Vitter caught with hooker
Clift: Vitter is not up until 2010 but the bad news is that we haven't heard the last about Vitter's sins
Podhoertz: the governor once lived with a stripper i love it
Blankley: how does Vitter know that God forgave him cause i use some of that action
Huffington: dood goes on and on about the sanctity of marriage and now this
Blanlely: hey at least it was a woman not a teen boy
McLaughlin: right to privacy?
Podhoertz: no way if he didn't want publicity he shouldn't have chosen a public life and calling that hooker wans't a great idea either
McLaughlin: what about a zone of living your life
Podhoertz: no Vitter is a role model
Huffington: dood good lord for who - the issue is hypocrisy
Blankely: Ted Kennedy once pushed me out of the way at a buffet in DC
McLaughlin: Predictions!
Pod: some scandal brewing a some magazine
Clift: Landrieu is lucky because Vitter has been neutered
Blankely: Obama is in trouble because he wants little kids to have sex
Huffington: Sununu is going to dump Bush
*****************************************************************
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Chris Matthews on Jay Leno - July 18, 2007
***************************************************
Chris Matthews on Jay Leno - July 18, 2007
****************************************************
Leno: ok the Senate is stupid what happened
Matthews: the Republicans hate majority rule so the Dems had to demonstrate it using cots and pizzas to get publicity
Leno: oh ok
Matthews: this war is in this middle of arabia and it really pisses me off I mean it's really really bad!!
[applause]
Leno: but David Brooks says God loves Bush!!!
Matthews: Brooks is a complete fucking moron - you know who also says that? Osama bin Laden I mean where's the fucking humility??? If Bush had ever said he was on a mission from in 2000 he would never have been elected
[applause]
Leno: hmmm interesting
Matthews: you know America is not perfect we elected an actor President and a bodybuilder Governor jesus
Leno: well Arnold is very cool
Matthews: Bush is a big liar - we journalists have to question Bush a little more and not treat all politicians as if they dispense the truth
[applause]
Matthews: at every step of the way Bush and his cult have lied they lied on WMD, they lied on Iraq attacking us on 9/11 they lied about abu ghraib, we have to stop calling them Daddy
Leno: but that's what you do
Matthews: i know but I'm in recovery now
Leno: good for you it's like pundit rehab
Matthews: yeah i'm off the wagon of bullshit
Leno: what do u think of the candidates
Matthews: Rudy was a guy covered in dust, McCain is a guy wandering around in a flak jacket, Fred Thompson's is a guy in a recliner, Romney is a perfect guy,
Leno: wow u are hypnotically weird
Matthews: Obama needs to get into a street fight with Hillary
Leno: who is going to win
Mattews: we're going to go over to the cold side of the pillow but the Democrats are also evil so it's scary
Leno: who will the nominees be
Matthews: Subway Series baby take the Seven Train it's gonna be Hillary vs. Rudy !!!
******************************************************************
Chris Matthews on Jay Leno - July 18, 2007
****************************************************
Leno: ok the Senate is stupid what happened
Matthews: the Republicans hate majority rule so the Dems had to demonstrate it using cots and pizzas to get publicity
Leno: oh ok
Matthews: this war is in this middle of arabia and it really pisses me off I mean it's really really bad!!
[applause]
Leno: but David Brooks says God loves Bush!!!
Matthews: Brooks is a complete fucking moron - you know who also says that? Osama bin Laden I mean where's the fucking humility??? If Bush had ever said he was on a mission from in 2000 he would never have been elected
[applause]
Leno: hmmm interesting
Matthews: you know America is not perfect we elected an actor President and a bodybuilder Governor jesus
Leno: well Arnold is very cool
Matthews: Bush is a big liar - we journalists have to question Bush a little more and not treat all politicians as if they dispense the truth
[applause]
Matthews: at every step of the way Bush and his cult have lied they lied on WMD, they lied on Iraq attacking us on 9/11 they lied about abu ghraib, we have to stop calling them Daddy
Leno: but that's what you do
Matthews: i know but I'm in recovery now
Leno: good for you it's like pundit rehab
Matthews: yeah i'm off the wagon of bullshit
Leno: what do u think of the candidates
Matthews: Rudy was a guy covered in dust, McCain is a guy wandering around in a flak jacket, Fred Thompson's is a guy in a recliner, Romney is a perfect guy,
Leno: wow u are hypnotically weird
Matthews: Obama needs to get into a street fight with Hillary
Leno: who is going to win
Mattews: we're going to go over to the cold side of the pillow but the Democrats are also evil so it's scary
Leno: who will the nominees be
Matthews: Subway Series baby take the Seven Train it's gonna be Hillary vs. Rudy !!!
******************************************************************
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Meet the Press - July 15, 2007
*******************************************************
Meet the Press - July 15, 2007
Host: Tim Russert
Guests: Sen. Jim Webb, Sen. Lindsey Graham
*******************************************************
Russert: dood are you trying to run the war
Webb: there is no war it's a botched occupation
Russert: wow sacrilege
Webb: it's all happened just like we all said we would it's a total disaster Congress has take over
Russert: yur trying to take Bush's pet war away from him aren't you - you heartless bastard
Webb: no way we're trying to impose some rational limits on Commander Crazy Person
Russert: Republicans are fleeing this war
Lindsay: i have personally declared our old strategy of hiding behind walls over our new strategy of hiding behind tanks is much better
Russert: excellent
Lindsay: this is a gigantic struggle it’s really World War Three the muslims wants to create a Caliphate from Baghdad to Nashville we must wipe out extremism by killing as many people as possible
Russert: what medications are you on dood cause i wants some
Webb: look i used to be Undersecretary of Defense- they have no strategy - what ever you want to do - even if you want to stay you have to be sensible
Russert: proxy war with Iran?
Webb: jesus the stupid is really up and in us this morning Iraq is a recruiting tool for al qaeda and no we are not in a fucking proxy war with iran
Russert: you really love killing don't you Lindsey
Graham: hey war sucks but i am not going to sit here and listen to you bad-mouth the troops of America
Russert: oh noes he’s got u there Webby
Linsdey: how dare people politicize a war Caesar Petraeus is America's Dictator is he wants to wear a purple robe that's his business
Graham: i'm buying a summer home in Al Anbar it rulz
Russert: i'll stay with Nantucket
Graham: number one enemy is al qaeda in Iraq they came to our 51st state Iraq because they hate America and McDonalds
Russert: what's Ramadi like
Graham: Petreaus moved in with an Iraqi family it's fun
Russert: excellent
Graham: Smash! Kill!
Webb: the loons like Graham are completely out of touch thankfully even most Republicans understand we have to face reality
Russert: is this World War Three
Webb: Al Qaeda doesn't hate democracy there is no democracy in Iraq for god’s sake they came to Iraq because they Americans are there
Russert: but Lieberman sez this war is so much fun
Webb: fuck him he thinks 500,000 American troops should occupy all of the middle east
Lindsay: god bless the troops Jim Webb why do you hate God and America ???
Webb: oh fuck you
Linsday: have you ever talked to soldiers they all love George W. Bush and Republicans
Webb: they polled the soldiers and they don't actually like Bush
Graham: oh screw em then
Webb: my family has served since 1776 and we don't even ask why anymore
Graham: God Bless God and the Lord and Jesus and this Glorious Christian Crusade
[break]
Murphy: McCain is going to run what we in the business call a "low budget campaign"
Novak: Romney 1.0, Muskie, all these losers i've seen them all McCain is just another one
Russert: Al you're older than Novak what do u think
Hunt: McCain’s a young whippersnapper but it's very sad he’s a real hero
Shrum: he tried to run as Bush that's a bad idea
Murphy: it's still early he could be a loser for several months
Novak: doods he is hated on every issue - global warming, stem cells, dammitt he wants to crack down on roaming Vampires - we can't have that!!
Murhphy: people are stupid so McCain could still win
Russert: Rudy is a cross-dressing liberal and hated by NYC firefighters
Firefighter: Rudy took away our radios and more than 100 soldiers were killed
Russert: let me here quote Rudy saying he only killed those firefighters because they were communists
Shurm: he's got the reverse midas touch he only hires criminals and perverts sure that works in NYC and Florida but not in Iowa
Novak: dood let me clue you in - "swift boating" works
Hunt: Rudy can take a punch - i know i asked his ex-wives
Murphy: he's going to run promising a new 9/11 every year he is president people may not want that
Russert: let me report on the covers of Newsweek and Time as it that were news in and of itself its all very meta cocktail party shit
Shrum: Bill and Hillary are all about nostalgia and Obama is real change
Murphy: If someone asked Robert Redford if he wanted to make a movie with Brad Pitt he would say no
Russert: stupid he did it was called "Spy Game"
Murphy: oh
Novak: [puts down glass of fresh blood] the people like Bill Clinton put alot of people also hate him
Russert: like who hates him??
Novak: me and all my vampire friends
Hunt: i think hillary is doing pretty well she is the front runner - except Obama is this crazy phenomenon i don't know what's going on i reminds me of when i fought in Gettysburg
Russert: dood why do they call you teh Prince of Darkness
Novak: back in the 1950s I went on a killing spree in Washington
Russert: one of the first serial killers
Novak: right
Russert: Rove confirmed Armitage's leak
Novak: plus the PR guy at the CIA said yeah she worked there
Russert: are you a traitor to America
Novak: if anyone was killed because of what i said i don't know but look Bush said it was ok so whatever
Russert: bush covered this up
Novak: no Armitage was the fall guy so why didn't Fitz charge anyone
Russert: where i come from we fight over women in DC people got drunk and fight over tax policy
Novak: dood you are from Washington get real
Russert: you used Eagleton to smear McGovern
Shurm: what a trainwreck that guy was let tell you I'm still glad i was on McGovern's side we lost but at least we didn't go to prison like Watergate aides
Russert: you identified your confidential sources because they are dead
Novak: we can argue about it in heaven
Russert: dood i hate to break it to you but aren't going to heaven
***************************************************
Meet the Press - July 15, 2007
Host: Tim Russert
Guests: Sen. Jim Webb, Sen. Lindsey Graham
*******************************************************
Russert: dood are you trying to run the war
Webb: there is no war it's a botched occupation
Russert: wow sacrilege
Webb: it's all happened just like we all said we would it's a total disaster Congress has take over
Russert: yur trying to take Bush's pet war away from him aren't you - you heartless bastard
Webb: no way we're trying to impose some rational limits on Commander Crazy Person
Russert: Republicans are fleeing this war
Lindsay: i have personally declared our old strategy of hiding behind walls over our new strategy of hiding behind tanks is much better
Russert: excellent
Lindsay: this is a gigantic struggle it’s really World War Three the muslims wants to create a Caliphate from Baghdad to Nashville we must wipe out extremism by killing as many people as possible
Russert: what medications are you on dood cause i wants some
Webb: look i used to be Undersecretary of Defense- they have no strategy - what ever you want to do - even if you want to stay you have to be sensible
Russert: proxy war with Iran?
Webb: jesus the stupid is really up and in us this morning Iraq is a recruiting tool for al qaeda and no we are not in a fucking proxy war with iran
Russert: you really love killing don't you Lindsey
Graham: hey war sucks but i am not going to sit here and listen to you bad-mouth the troops of America
Russert: oh noes he’s got u there Webby
Linsdey: how dare people politicize a war Caesar Petraeus is America's Dictator is he wants to wear a purple robe that's his business
Graham: i'm buying a summer home in Al Anbar it rulz
Russert: i'll stay with Nantucket
Graham: number one enemy is al qaeda in Iraq they came to our 51st state Iraq because they hate America and McDonalds
Russert: what's Ramadi like
Graham: Petreaus moved in with an Iraqi family it's fun
Russert: excellent
Graham: Smash! Kill!
Webb: the loons like Graham are completely out of touch thankfully even most Republicans understand we have to face reality
Russert: is this World War Three
Webb: Al Qaeda doesn't hate democracy there is no democracy in Iraq for god’s sake they came to Iraq because they Americans are there
Russert: but Lieberman sez this war is so much fun
Webb: fuck him he thinks 500,000 American troops should occupy all of the middle east
Lindsay: god bless the troops Jim Webb why do you hate God and America ???
Webb: oh fuck you
Linsday: have you ever talked to soldiers they all love George W. Bush and Republicans
Webb: they polled the soldiers and they don't actually like Bush
Graham: oh screw em then
Webb: my family has served since 1776 and we don't even ask why anymore
Graham: God Bless God and the Lord and Jesus and this Glorious Christian Crusade
[break]
Murphy: McCain is going to run what we in the business call a "low budget campaign"
Novak: Romney 1.0, Muskie, all these losers i've seen them all McCain is just another one
Russert: Al you're older than Novak what do u think
Hunt: McCain’s a young whippersnapper but it's very sad he’s a real hero
Shrum: he tried to run as Bush that's a bad idea
Murphy: it's still early he could be a loser for several months
Novak: doods he is hated on every issue - global warming, stem cells, dammitt he wants to crack down on roaming Vampires - we can't have that!!
Murhphy: people are stupid so McCain could still win
Russert: Rudy is a cross-dressing liberal and hated by NYC firefighters
Firefighter: Rudy took away our radios and more than 100 soldiers were killed
Russert: let me here quote Rudy saying he only killed those firefighters because they were communists
Shurm: he's got the reverse midas touch he only hires criminals and perverts sure that works in NYC and Florida but not in Iowa
Novak: dood let me clue you in - "swift boating" works
Hunt: Rudy can take a punch - i know i asked his ex-wives
Murphy: he's going to run promising a new 9/11 every year he is president people may not want that
Russert: let me report on the covers of Newsweek and Time as it that were news in and of itself its all very meta cocktail party shit
Shrum: Bill and Hillary are all about nostalgia and Obama is real change
Murphy: If someone asked Robert Redford if he wanted to make a movie with Brad Pitt he would say no
Russert: stupid he did it was called "Spy Game"
Murphy: oh
Novak: [puts down glass of fresh blood] the people like Bill Clinton put alot of people also hate him
Russert: like who hates him??
Novak: me and all my vampire friends
Hunt: i think hillary is doing pretty well she is the front runner - except Obama is this crazy phenomenon i don't know what's going on i reminds me of when i fought in Gettysburg
Russert: dood why do they call you teh Prince of Darkness
Novak: back in the 1950s I went on a killing spree in Washington
Russert: one of the first serial killers
Novak: right
Russert: Rove confirmed Armitage's leak
Novak: plus the PR guy at the CIA said yeah she worked there
Russert: are you a traitor to America
Novak: if anyone was killed because of what i said i don't know but look Bush said it was ok so whatever
Russert: bush covered this up
Novak: no Armitage was the fall guy so why didn't Fitz charge anyone
Russert: where i come from we fight over women in DC people got drunk and fight over tax policy
Novak: dood you are from Washington get real
Russert: you used Eagleton to smear McGovern
Shurm: what a trainwreck that guy was let tell you I'm still glad i was on McGovern's side we lost but at least we didn't go to prison like Watergate aides
Russert: you identified your confidential sources because they are dead
Novak: we can argue about it in heaven
Russert: dood i hate to break it to you but aren't going to heaven
***************************************************
The Chris Matthews Show - July 15, 2007
***********************************************************
The Chris Matthews Show - July 15, 2007
***********************************************************
Chris Matthews: Bush is failing what's up with that
David Gregory: the people don't give a shit about Commander Stupid anymore
Matthews: he lives in a bubble
Gregory: yeah they've promised more killing to mollify the faithful
Matthews: let's blame those dirty fucking Iraqis
Katty Kay: Bush is like a dog he can hear the sounds of success no one else can hear
Matthews: Iraqis all hate each other
Cynthia Tucker: Bush is now moving the goalposts - soon our mission will be to leave an Iraq that is hot, dusty and violent
Matthews: i will gladly eat a hamburger today if you give me another one tomorrow
Lizza: they all blame the generals but it's a dodge
Matthews: really i'm dumbfounded
Ryan Lizza: dood of course Bush is charge
Matthews: he's shopping at "Generals R Us"
Gregory: he's didn't deliver democracy he's deliverd Shiite rule it's completely insane
Lizza: democracy is yesterday's crap theme
Matthews: it's all Al Qaeda
Kay: dood that's stupid
Matthews: he only listens to sycophants
Gregory: there has to be a bipartisan mission to get Bunnypants to see reality
Matthews: how?
Gregory: have James Baker and Lee Hamilton stage a coup
Matthews: one year from now what happens
Tucker: Bush will never ever ever change
Matthews: will he buckle
Gregory: yes a dramatic refocusing
Lizza: no way dood
Kay: we’ll be in Iraq at least 10 years
Matthews: McCain had a very strategy of embracing Bush, the wingnuts, neocons and illegal aliens -- incredibly that's not a winning strategy
Gregory: what a dweeb
Matthews: he's got such an edge to him he's sexy
Gregory: eeewwwww
Matthews: i really admire how they believe in a disastrous war
Tucker: he's a war hero and that really hurts you among Republican voters they don't trust people like that
Kay: people like you developed a man-crush on him years ago and you and Gregory say he doesn't pay attention to polls well then why did he go to Falwell's University??
Matthews: ouch
Kay: stop playing with your dicks and look at his record
Lizza: dood whenever a politician does something unpopular they always say they're acting on principle and not paying attention to polls
Matthews: can he make a comeback
Gregory: oh definitely
Kay: oh please
Gregroy: [ raising his voice ] yes he can! Look at our responsibility to completely remake the Middle East damitt!!
Matthews: who picks up the shards of his shattered campaign
Tucker: no one it’s like walking on broken glass
Gregory: Bush's people now regret they didn't take up the Baker-Hamilton idea
Matthews: wow why didn't they
Gregory: because they luv telling people with good ideas to fuck off
Lizza: Obama got 250,000 donors by counting a bumper sticker purchase as a donation
Matthews: ooh i want one of those he's handsome
Katty Kay: [ smacks forehead ]
*******************************************************
The Chris Matthews Show - July 15, 2007
***********************************************************
Chris Matthews: Bush is failing what's up with that
David Gregory: the people don't give a shit about Commander Stupid anymore
Matthews: he lives in a bubble
Gregory: yeah they've promised more killing to mollify the faithful
Matthews: let's blame those dirty fucking Iraqis
Katty Kay: Bush is like a dog he can hear the sounds of success no one else can hear
Matthews: Iraqis all hate each other
Cynthia Tucker: Bush is now moving the goalposts - soon our mission will be to leave an Iraq that is hot, dusty and violent
Matthews: i will gladly eat a hamburger today if you give me another one tomorrow
Lizza: they all blame the generals but it's a dodge
Matthews: really i'm dumbfounded
Ryan Lizza: dood of course Bush is charge
Matthews: he's shopping at "Generals R Us"
Gregory: he's didn't deliver democracy he's deliverd Shiite rule it's completely insane
Lizza: democracy is yesterday's crap theme
Matthews: it's all Al Qaeda
Kay: dood that's stupid
Matthews: he only listens to sycophants
Gregory: there has to be a bipartisan mission to get Bunnypants to see reality
Matthews: how?
Gregory: have James Baker and Lee Hamilton stage a coup
Matthews: one year from now what happens
Tucker: Bush will never ever ever change
Matthews: will he buckle
Gregory: yes a dramatic refocusing
Lizza: no way dood
Kay: we’ll be in Iraq at least 10 years
Matthews: McCain had a very strategy of embracing Bush, the wingnuts, neocons and illegal aliens -- incredibly that's not a winning strategy
Gregory: what a dweeb
Matthews: he's got such an edge to him he's sexy
Gregory: eeewwwww
Matthews: i really admire how they believe in a disastrous war
Tucker: he's a war hero and that really hurts you among Republican voters they don't trust people like that
Kay: people like you developed a man-crush on him years ago and you and Gregory say he doesn't pay attention to polls well then why did he go to Falwell's University??
Matthews: ouch
Kay: stop playing with your dicks and look at his record
Lizza: dood whenever a politician does something unpopular they always say they're acting on principle and not paying attention to polls
Matthews: can he make a comeback
Gregory: oh definitely
Kay: oh please
Gregroy: [ raising his voice ] yes he can! Look at our responsibility to completely remake the Middle East damitt!!
Matthews: who picks up the shards of his shattered campaign
Tucker: no one it’s like walking on broken glass
Gregory: Bush's people now regret they didn't take up the Baker-Hamilton idea
Matthews: wow why didn't they
Gregory: because they luv telling people with good ideas to fuck off
Lizza: Obama got 250,000 donors by counting a bumper sticker purchase as a donation
Matthews: ooh i want one of those he's handsome
Katty Kay: [ smacks forehead ]
*******************************************************
The McLaughlin Group Brought to You By AARP
****************************************************
The McLaughlin Group Brought to You By AARP
****************************************************
McLaughlin: Al Qaeda has a safe haven in Pakistan and they are ready to stage a spectacular attack
Pat Buchanan: dood we've made a lot of progess after all we've elected Republicans that's good
Eleanor Clift: this is a total disaster they even have training camps and DVDs
Tony Blankley: well Al Qeada is getting really really powerful and we're not safe an attack is right around the corner!!
Arianna Huffington: we've actually regressed we're stuck in Iraq allowing Al Qaeda to regroup in Afghanistan and Pakistan
McLaughlin: bush is trying to mollify Republicans having this story put out there
Blankely: it was andrea mitchell and we know she is a liberal because he is a woman reporter
Clift: Bush sucks iraq helps Osama
Buchanan: that's right
Blankely: someday you will all find out we Live In A Dangerous World
Clift: oh for god's sake where do you idiots learn to talk like that some Hogwarts for Neocons or something???
Huffington: Bush is impervious to facts he just repeats the Big Lie
McL: why is al qaeda winning
Buchanan: the iraq war
Clift: the iraq war
Blankely: the iraq war also we haven't violated civil liberties enough
Huffington: Afghanistan isn’t won yet
Buchanan: tony is right we shouldn't have invaded Iraq - curse those damm liberals!!!
McL: doesn't a terror attack help Bush
Clift: it would have before but not anymore
Buchanan: Chertoff got smacked down by liberals and Tony Snow - nice going dood
McLaughlin: 62% of Americans think the war was a mistake even Republicans want to get out could Baker-Hamilton be the answer??
Clift: Bush is playing for time until the report he has control over comes out in September
Huffington: Bush is completely irrational dood
McL: how do you explain him
Huffington: Bush is a complete fanatic
Buchanan: Bush is a true believer that leaving Iraq would be a geostrategic disaster such a deep thinker he is
Blankely: look who among us can question the military judgment of a loser businessman who ran the PR office of a baseball team
McL: Surge is a total failure
McL: Surgeon General says Bushies alter science to serve right wing ideology is all this an impeachable offense
Huffington: of course but that takes a lot of effort
Blankely: the President is right to change science which has a liberal bias
Buchanan: anyone who oppose nazi rule is a crybaby
McL: it's a Cult of Personality
********************************************************
The McLaughlin Group Brought to You By AARP
****************************************************
McLaughlin: Al Qaeda has a safe haven in Pakistan and they are ready to stage a spectacular attack
Pat Buchanan: dood we've made a lot of progess after all we've elected Republicans that's good
Eleanor Clift: this is a total disaster they even have training camps and DVDs
Tony Blankley: well Al Qeada is getting really really powerful and we're not safe an attack is right around the corner!!
Arianna Huffington: we've actually regressed we're stuck in Iraq allowing Al Qaeda to regroup in Afghanistan and Pakistan
McLaughlin: bush is trying to mollify Republicans having this story put out there
Blankely: it was andrea mitchell and we know she is a liberal because he is a woman reporter
Clift: Bush sucks iraq helps Osama
Buchanan: that's right
Blankely: someday you will all find out we Live In A Dangerous World
Clift: oh for god's sake where do you idiots learn to talk like that some Hogwarts for Neocons or something???
Huffington: Bush is impervious to facts he just repeats the Big Lie
McL: why is al qaeda winning
Buchanan: the iraq war
Clift: the iraq war
Blankely: the iraq war also we haven't violated civil liberties enough
Huffington: Afghanistan isn’t won yet
Buchanan: tony is right we shouldn't have invaded Iraq - curse those damm liberals!!!
McL: doesn't a terror attack help Bush
Clift: it would have before but not anymore
Buchanan: Chertoff got smacked down by liberals and Tony Snow - nice going dood
McLaughlin: 62% of Americans think the war was a mistake even Republicans want to get out could Baker-Hamilton be the answer??
Clift: Bush is playing for time until the report he has control over comes out in September
Huffington: Bush is completely irrational dood
McL: how do you explain him
Huffington: Bush is a complete fanatic
Buchanan: Bush is a true believer that leaving Iraq would be a geostrategic disaster such a deep thinker he is
Blankely: look who among us can question the military judgment of a loser businessman who ran the PR office of a baseball team
McL: Surge is a total failure
McL: Surgeon General says Bushies alter science to serve right wing ideology is all this an impeachable offense
Huffington: of course but that takes a lot of effort
Blankely: the President is right to change science which has a liberal bias
Buchanan: anyone who oppose nazi rule is a crybaby
McL: it's a Cult of Personality
********************************************************
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Michael Moore on Larry King; Scarborough and Matthews on La-Z-Boy
An abbreviated Michael Moore and Sanjay Gupta on Larry King from July 10, 2007
Bonus: Chris Matthews waxes rhapsodic about La-Z-Boy chairs on Scarborough.
Scarborough in the Morning, MSNBC - July 10, 2007
Scarborough: David Vitter's wife said she would Bobbitt him dood
Matthews: I'm on his side
Scar: he's a good guy
Matthews: oh yeah he's handled it really well
Scar: pleaz speak ill of Hillary
Matthews: he's gotta say 'hey every time Hillary sees me she crosses the street' after all just she does with me
Scar: he's gotta to take the gloves off
Matthews: he's acts all pure and nice and shit he's in a trap where he can never be mean and we know Hillary is tough
Scar: poor rick lazio would be the president if not for the Clinton machine
Matthews: Obama is black so I'll give him an analogy he can understand he's got to call a foul like in the NBA
Scar: get into a fight with her
Matthews: meet hillary on a street corner some night
Scar: what happened to your luv for John McCain?
Matthews: Mitt Romney is perfect looking, very pristine, and handsome - the man you marry and have kids with and regret and develop a drinking problem; Fred Thompson is more like my perfect rough and neat-smelling daddy who I still won't admit abused me; Rudy Giuliani is more like my tough bad boy boyfriend who loves only himself; McCain is like the boy I took to the prom and who is now a soldier in Iraq and no one cares about anymore.
Scar: dood u really do have teh active imagination
Matthews: i luv to think of Fred Thompson in a comfortable Lazy Boy chair - I could crawl up in his lap and he could tell me stories about how Rudy saved American and John McCain single handedly fought the war in Iraq
Scar: John Ridley is telling me my good buddy David Vitter is in fact a big sanctimonious hypocrite so i gotta go
***************************************************************************
Michael Moore and Sanjay Gupta on Larry King - July 10, 2007
Sanjay Gupta: aaawwww poor widdle loved ones fooled by michael moore when France is drowning in taxes and they have a deficit!!!!
Moore: u just quoted my own movie man oh man you a complete fucking idiot
Gupta: wow im so cool i rendered Michael Moore speechless
Moore: im just trying to avoid using the word mother and fucker too close together dood
Gupta: i'm not saying i disagree with you michael i'm just saying yur fat
Moore: actually dood i luv america we put on the man on the moon and defeated the nazis before Commander Stupid came along
Gupta: yeah but people will still die under yur system micheal do you deny that!!!
King: people die why
Gupta: dood there's lots of lazy uninsured peeple plus michel moore is still fat
King: will u finally loose wait dood
Moore: no dood if i do there will still be 40 million people in america waiting forever to get shit
Gupta: eh i suppose anyone can nit pick but what if the very fat michel moore needs a new heart
Moore: dood do i get fictional insurance in yur scenario
King: do u regret anything
Moore: i should't have pulled Wolfe's beard but man that guy was getting to me
Gupta: I’m not biased look at my nice smile
Moore: yur a whore
Gupta: i asked that dood and he said he wasn't biased what more could i do
King: coming up prison and sex could be a hot one!!!eart where is he gonna go
*****************************************************************************
Bonus: Chris Matthews waxes rhapsodic about La-Z-Boy chairs on Scarborough.
Scarborough in the Morning, MSNBC - July 10, 2007
Scarborough: David Vitter's wife said she would Bobbitt him dood
Matthews: I'm on his side
Scar: he's a good guy
Matthews: oh yeah he's handled it really well
Scar: pleaz speak ill of Hillary
Matthews: he's gotta say 'hey every time Hillary sees me she crosses the street' after all just she does with me
Scar: he's gotta to take the gloves off
Matthews: he's acts all pure and nice and shit he's in a trap where he can never be mean and we know Hillary is tough
Scar: poor rick lazio would be the president if not for the Clinton machine
Matthews: Obama is black so I'll give him an analogy he can understand he's got to call a foul like in the NBA
Scar: get into a fight with her
Matthews: meet hillary on a street corner some night
Scar: what happened to your luv for John McCain?
Matthews: Mitt Romney is perfect looking, very pristine, and handsome - the man you marry and have kids with and regret and develop a drinking problem; Fred Thompson is more like my perfect rough and neat-smelling daddy who I still won't admit abused me; Rudy Giuliani is more like my tough bad boy boyfriend who loves only himself; McCain is like the boy I took to the prom and who is now a soldier in Iraq and no one cares about anymore.
Scar: dood u really do have teh active imagination
Matthews: i luv to think of Fred Thompson in a comfortable Lazy Boy chair - I could crawl up in his lap and he could tell me stories about how Rudy saved American and John McCain single handedly fought the war in Iraq
Scar: John Ridley is telling me my good buddy David Vitter is in fact a big sanctimonious hypocrite so i gotta go
***************************************************************************
Michael Moore and Sanjay Gupta on Larry King - July 10, 2007
Sanjay Gupta: aaawwww poor widdle loved ones fooled by michael moore when France is drowning in taxes and they have a deficit!!!!
Moore: u just quoted my own movie man oh man you a complete fucking idiot
Gupta: wow im so cool i rendered Michael Moore speechless
Moore: im just trying to avoid using the word mother and fucker too close together dood
Gupta: i'm not saying i disagree with you michael i'm just saying yur fat
Moore: actually dood i luv america we put on the man on the moon and defeated the nazis before Commander Stupid came along
Gupta: yeah but people will still die under yur system micheal do you deny that!!!
King: people die why
Gupta: dood there's lots of lazy uninsured peeple plus michel moore is still fat
King: will u finally loose wait dood
Moore: no dood if i do there will still be 40 million people in america waiting forever to get shit
Gupta: eh i suppose anyone can nit pick but what if the very fat michel moore needs a new heart
Moore: dood do i get fictional insurance in yur scenario
King: do u regret anything
Moore: i should't have pulled Wolfe's beard but man that guy was getting to me
Gupta: I’m not biased look at my nice smile
Moore: yur a whore
Gupta: i asked that dood and he said he wasn't biased what more could i do
King: coming up prison and sex could be a hot one!!!eart where is he gonna go
*****************************************************************************
Sunday, July 08, 2007
Meet The Press on NBC - July 8, 2007
***********************************************************
Meet The Press on NBC - July 8, 2007
Guest Host: David Gregory
Guests: Sen. Chuck Hagel, Eugene Robinson, Todd Purdum, Ann Kornblut, David Brooks
***********************************************************
NotRussert: 518 troops have been killed since The Surge began and Bush is moving the goalposts what's up
Chuck Hagel: the violence is totally uncontrollable and we're stuck in the middle of a civil war
Gregory: wow
Hagel: there is no military solution - we have to make a political effort
Gregory: but dood we haven't killed enough people yet!
Hagel: that’s true but violence begats violence i read that in a fortune cookie once
Gregory: how is the Iraqi government
Hagel: the Maliki government is in the crapper
Gregory: no one is showing up for Cabinet meetings and the Sunnis are boycotting
Hagel: we can't control uncontrollables
Gregory: a-ha
Hagel: look dood the republicans are fleeing this war so I have to tell you that now really its over
Gregory: so sad
Hagel: also our military is coming to a crashing halt everyone knows it but Prime Minister Stupid in Chief
Gregory: hey i know that dood
Hagel: time to put the hammer down!
Greogry: but we can’t just leave - I haven’t won a Pulitzer yet
Hagel: we still have a role to play - for instance we've been undermining our interests in the Middle East, we could keep doing that but in a safe way
Gregory: sounds good to me
Hagel: we took our eye off the ball which is extremism
Gregory: support a timeline to withdraw?
Hagel: we need a phased withdraw
Gregroy: set our phasers on stun?
Hagel: dood if we don't pull out now we will be in big deep hole
Gregory: leave iraq yes or no
Hagel: it can't be the Dirty Hippie Withdrawal it has to be Withdrawal + Plus Killing
Gregory: oh good I’d hate to do it right
Hagel: Bush is a idiot who rejected Baker - Hamilton you see it's a Safe Harbor for Senators to hide behind why Bush did not seize on it I have no idea
Gregory: he's a moron?
Hagel: uh yeah - look I talked to career military officers and they say it will take a full generation to recover from the disastrous Bush presidency
Gregory: age of aquarius dood
Hagel: we don't wins hearts and minds by killing people and weakening our military
Gregory: but if we leave it will be a mess in Iraq
Hagel: what the fuck dood are you high it's a fucking mess right now who the fuck are we kidding
Gregory: the Joe Lieberman Weekly sez you turned against Vietnam because of all the lies
Hagel: Edifice of Distortion
Greogry: dood that would make a great name for a rock group
Hagel: yes it was all a pack of lies and stupid decisions - we all know that the problem is people don't trust the President and he is done
Gregory: are you saying Bush is an untrustworthy fucker
Hagel: no i simply believe that he is certifiably insane
Gregory: oh ok
Hagel: he has 90 days to prove that he is not a mass murderer call it the Hagel Dialectic
Gregory: do you believe Bush luvs killing
Hagel: Bush sayz he's the Decider or some such nonsense but we can cut off the money or frankly resort to impeachment
Gregory: would you impeach
Hagel: not today but then i haven't got any articles right in front of me - hint hint
Gregory: 90 days?
Hagel: Bush must surrender to non-morons on Capitol Hill or we will introduce him to little thing called fucking reality
Gregory: dood you held a press conference to announce you might run for President but were not at that time then u had dinner with Mayor Bloomberg what's up
Hagel: i will decide in the next 60 days call it the Hagelberg Unit
Gregory: r u independent
Hagel: [ twiddles thumbs looks at ceiling ]
Gregory: dood yur so coy
Hagel: hey u never know god knows the Republican party is teh suck
Gregory: what will happen in 60 dayz
Hagel: i have to find out if people hate me or luv me or know who the hell i am
Gregory: yur like a smart version of john McCain
Hagel: heh what a fucking idiot he is
Gregory: will u endorse someone
Hagel: i may vote for Joe Biden or Chris Dodd
Gregory: dood c'mon!!
Hagel: i know it's sad but look the people think the country is on the wrong track so i would luv to run as independent by my problem is just how do you get 270 electoral votes
Gregory: u could just cheat like George Bush
[ break ]
Gregory: scooter libby pardon yes or no
Hagel: totally wrong the Founders did not want Presidents to engage in selective justice just when you thought Bush couldn't sink any lower there he goes
Gregory: David Brooks you wrote the stupidest column in human history this week are mentally ill, on drugs, or are you just a complete fucker??
David Brooks: well Libby’s career was ruined and his reputation was shot, so really isn't that enough he is a white man after all
Todd Purdum: worst decision ever now every person convicted of the same crime can also not go to jail jesus christ
Eugene Robinson: Libby's only supporters were Beltway reporters who luv outing CIA agents
Gregory: was Libby blackmailing Bush?
Robinson: David Brooks is a moron -- the judge, jury, DOJ, prosecutor were all Republicans the only politics was the commutation itself
Gregory: ok let's spend the rest of the panel bashing Hillary and The Cleins!!!!!!!
Panel: we luv it!
Gregory: Ha ha so fun Marc Rich Marc Rich Marc Rich Marc Rich!!!!!!
Kornblut: omg i had kittenz when she mentioned “justice” Hillary had several people murdered and Clinton pardoned Osama Bin Laden i mean me and the other reporters were like wow
David Brooks: the bottom line is whether yur a liberal or conservative the truth is nothing is illegal inside the Beltway
Gregory: Kinsley made a interesting point which is perjury is okay if you're defending an illegal war
Eugene Robinson: well that's very cute i wonder what fucking planet are you all from it's the call the jury system -- should we not have that anymore because the black community would love to hear that
Brooks: because Republicans lied about this that means everyone was dishonest
Gregory: wow how do you figure
Brooks: prosecutors should not prosecute people its crazy
Gregory: what’s the Bill Factor
Kornblut: they tried to diminish Bill Clinton’s glamour they dressed him like Ward Cleaver
Greogry: but that didn't work because we all want him back as President
Purdum: are we really ready for another 8 years of peace and prosperity - i mean she's just like Bush except not
Gregory: Obama is black and white it's crazy!!!
Robinson: Obama doesn't have enough experience being married to a President who had sex with an intern behind his back leading him to move to a strange state and run for the Senate
Brooks: Obama never takes the cheap shot in debates its hurting him
Gregory: McCain is running the suckiest campaign ever
Purdum: he's not trying to pander to people anymore he still supports the war
Gregory: he had no more money
Purudm: last year he had a private jet and last week he was seen in Row 29 of a coach
Gregory: on a commercial airline wow?
Purdum: no Greyhound dood
Brooks: look the Republican party is falling apart everyone hates them
Gregory: Fred Thompson you know Tweety Matthews luvs him
Robinson: he's just a stupid fad
Purdum: Republicans have to sink really low and get pragmatic to have a chance in 2008
Gregory: so sad
Purdum: you got the cross dresser, the nutjob, the mormon,
Kornblut: the people are enthused for the Democrats heck even Chris Dodd
Gregory: david brooks tell us about Iraq
Brooks: in September they will announce they have won in Baghdad and flee for their lives
Robinson: yeah bush will withdraw from Iraq also hell will freeze over and bloggers will fly out of my ass
Purdum: Bush is in mental collapse
Gregory: What is Bush’s deal is he crazy
Kornblut: Bush believes he is on a mission from God
Gregory: we’re all doomed and out of time
****************************************************************
Meet The Press on NBC - July 8, 2007
Guest Host: David Gregory
Guests: Sen. Chuck Hagel, Eugene Robinson, Todd Purdum, Ann Kornblut, David Brooks
***********************************************************
NotRussert: 518 troops have been killed since The Surge began and Bush is moving the goalposts what's up
Chuck Hagel: the violence is totally uncontrollable and we're stuck in the middle of a civil war
Gregory: wow
Hagel: there is no military solution - we have to make a political effort
Gregory: but dood we haven't killed enough people yet!
Hagel: that’s true but violence begats violence i read that in a fortune cookie once
Gregory: how is the Iraqi government
Hagel: the Maliki government is in the crapper
Gregory: no one is showing up for Cabinet meetings and the Sunnis are boycotting
Hagel: we can't control uncontrollables
Gregory: a-ha
Hagel: look dood the republicans are fleeing this war so I have to tell you that now really its over
Gregory: so sad
Hagel: also our military is coming to a crashing halt everyone knows it but Prime Minister Stupid in Chief
Gregory: hey i know that dood
Hagel: time to put the hammer down!
Greogry: but we can’t just leave - I haven’t won a Pulitzer yet
Hagel: we still have a role to play - for instance we've been undermining our interests in the Middle East, we could keep doing that but in a safe way
Gregory: sounds good to me
Hagel: we took our eye off the ball which is extremism
Gregory: support a timeline to withdraw?
Hagel: we need a phased withdraw
Gregroy: set our phasers on stun?
Hagel: dood if we don't pull out now we will be in big deep hole
Gregory: leave iraq yes or no
Hagel: it can't be the Dirty Hippie Withdrawal it has to be Withdrawal + Plus Killing
Gregory: oh good I’d hate to do it right
Hagel: Bush is a idiot who rejected Baker - Hamilton you see it's a Safe Harbor for Senators to hide behind why Bush did not seize on it I have no idea
Gregory: he's a moron?
Hagel: uh yeah - look I talked to career military officers and they say it will take a full generation to recover from the disastrous Bush presidency
Gregory: age of aquarius dood
Hagel: we don't wins hearts and minds by killing people and weakening our military
Gregory: but if we leave it will be a mess in Iraq
Hagel: what the fuck dood are you high it's a fucking mess right now who the fuck are we kidding
Gregory: the Joe Lieberman Weekly sez you turned against Vietnam because of all the lies
Hagel: Edifice of Distortion
Greogry: dood that would make a great name for a rock group
Hagel: yes it was all a pack of lies and stupid decisions - we all know that the problem is people don't trust the President and he is done
Gregory: are you saying Bush is an untrustworthy fucker
Hagel: no i simply believe that he is certifiably insane
Gregory: oh ok
Hagel: he has 90 days to prove that he is not a mass murderer call it the Hagel Dialectic
Gregory: do you believe Bush luvs killing
Hagel: Bush sayz he's the Decider or some such nonsense but we can cut off the money or frankly resort to impeachment
Gregory: would you impeach
Hagel: not today but then i haven't got any articles right in front of me - hint hint
Gregory: 90 days?
Hagel: Bush must surrender to non-morons on Capitol Hill or we will introduce him to little thing called fucking reality
Gregory: dood you held a press conference to announce you might run for President but were not at that time then u had dinner with Mayor Bloomberg what's up
Hagel: i will decide in the next 60 days call it the Hagelberg Unit
Gregory: r u independent
Hagel: [ twiddles thumbs looks at ceiling ]
Gregory: dood yur so coy
Hagel: hey u never know god knows the Republican party is teh suck
Gregory: what will happen in 60 dayz
Hagel: i have to find out if people hate me or luv me or know who the hell i am
Gregory: yur like a smart version of john McCain
Hagel: heh what a fucking idiot he is
Gregory: will u endorse someone
Hagel: i may vote for Joe Biden or Chris Dodd
Gregory: dood c'mon!!
Hagel: i know it's sad but look the people think the country is on the wrong track so i would luv to run as independent by my problem is just how do you get 270 electoral votes
Gregory: u could just cheat like George Bush
[ break ]
Gregory: scooter libby pardon yes or no
Hagel: totally wrong the Founders did not want Presidents to engage in selective justice just when you thought Bush couldn't sink any lower there he goes
Gregory: David Brooks you wrote the stupidest column in human history this week are mentally ill, on drugs, or are you just a complete fucker??
David Brooks: well Libby’s career was ruined and his reputation was shot, so really isn't that enough he is a white man after all
Todd Purdum: worst decision ever now every person convicted of the same crime can also not go to jail jesus christ
Eugene Robinson: Libby's only supporters were Beltway reporters who luv outing CIA agents
Gregory: was Libby blackmailing Bush?
Robinson: David Brooks is a moron -- the judge, jury, DOJ, prosecutor were all Republicans the only politics was the commutation itself
Gregory: ok let's spend the rest of the panel bashing Hillary and The Cleins!!!!!!!
Panel: we luv it!
Gregory: Ha ha so fun Marc Rich Marc Rich Marc Rich Marc Rich!!!!!!
Kornblut: omg i had kittenz when she mentioned “justice” Hillary had several people murdered and Clinton pardoned Osama Bin Laden i mean me and the other reporters were like wow
David Brooks: the bottom line is whether yur a liberal or conservative the truth is nothing is illegal inside the Beltway
Gregory: Kinsley made a interesting point which is perjury is okay if you're defending an illegal war
Eugene Robinson: well that's very cute i wonder what fucking planet are you all from it's the call the jury system -- should we not have that anymore because the black community would love to hear that
Brooks: because Republicans lied about this that means everyone was dishonest
Gregory: wow how do you figure
Brooks: prosecutors should not prosecute people its crazy
Gregory: what’s the Bill Factor
Kornblut: they tried to diminish Bill Clinton’s glamour they dressed him like Ward Cleaver
Greogry: but that didn't work because we all want him back as President
Purdum: are we really ready for another 8 years of peace and prosperity - i mean she's just like Bush except not
Gregory: Obama is black and white it's crazy!!!
Robinson: Obama doesn't have enough experience being married to a President who had sex with an intern behind his back leading him to move to a strange state and run for the Senate
Brooks: Obama never takes the cheap shot in debates its hurting him
Gregory: McCain is running the suckiest campaign ever
Purdum: he's not trying to pander to people anymore he still supports the war
Gregory: he had no more money
Purudm: last year he had a private jet and last week he was seen in Row 29 of a coach
Gregory: on a commercial airline wow?
Purdum: no Greyhound dood
Brooks: look the Republican party is falling apart everyone hates them
Gregory: Fred Thompson you know Tweety Matthews luvs him
Robinson: he's just a stupid fad
Purdum: Republicans have to sink really low and get pragmatic to have a chance in 2008
Gregory: so sad
Purdum: you got the cross dresser, the nutjob, the mormon,
Kornblut: the people are enthused for the Democrats heck even Chris Dodd
Gregory: david brooks tell us about Iraq
Brooks: in September they will announce they have won in Baghdad and flee for their lives
Robinson: yeah bush will withdraw from Iraq also hell will freeze over and bloggers will fly out of my ass
Purdum: Bush is in mental collapse
Gregory: What is Bush’s deal is he crazy
Kornblut: Bush believes he is on a mission from God
Gregory: we’re all doomed and out of time
****************************************************************
This Week With George Stephanopoulos on ABC -- July 8, 2007
*******************************************************************
This Week With George Stephanopoulos on ABC
July 8, 2007
Guests: Ron Paul, Mike Gravel, Fareed Zakaria, Katrina vanden Heuvel, Rich Lowry
*******************************************************************
Stephanopoulos: Ron Paul you have more $$$ than John McCain what's up
Ron Paul: there are a lot of Americans who actually like freedom and oppose invading Iraq, who knew??!!
Stephanopoulos: you want to leave Iraq but don't we have a responsibility to all the Iraqis who love us and wanted us to invade
Paul: dood we have responsibility to Americans besides the people who now say it would be a disaster said the invasion would be a cakewalk
Stephanopoulos: but that’s so risky
Paul: unlike invading Iraq
Stephanopoulos: more Republicans are coming to your side
Paul: if they don't they will lose elections
Stephanopoulos: Rudy says you said we invited the 9/11 attacks
Paul: the 9/11 commission agrees with me and so does Paul Wolfowitz
Stephanopoulos: any regrets about saying we were attacked because we have a presence in the middle east
Paul: no Rudy is a just a fucking demagogue
Stephanopoulos: do you think Rudy knows better
Paul: well he's a moron and a weirdo but he knows better now
Stephanopoulos: you're an isolationist
Paul: no i want to trade with people and be friends did you know that invading Iraq was a great gift to Osama bin Laden
Stephanopoulos: why are you running as a Republican
Paul: dood i was elected to Congress as 10 times as a Republican -- why shouldn't I
Stephanopoulos: you're a crank who won't interact with the government
Paul: that's how i roll
Stephanopoulos: you can't possibly win
Paul: are you willing to bet all the money you have on that
Stephanopoulos: yes
[ break ]
Stephanopoulos: Mike Gravel yur completely crazy what's up
Gravel: no i throw rocks in the lake and its like throwing rocks at the Democratic party
Stephanopoulos: you say the other candidates are immoral
Gravel: they should end the war right now if they don't it's morally wrong
Stephanopoulos: dood you want indict the President in a court of law
Gravel: damm right
Stephanopoulos: they don't have the votes
Gravel: yes they do because i say they do
Stephanopoulos: dood you were a crank during the Vietnam war too
Gravel: yes i could have gone to jail for what i did
Stephanopoulos: you say all former war supporters are not qualified but that knocks out everyone but Obama
Gravel: no it disqualifies Obama too because he hasn't personally had Bush arrested and dragged through the streets
Stephanopoulos: dood why don't you do it then
Gravel: i would but Matlock is on five days a week on TBS!!!
Stephanopoulos: you seem to be having fun
Gravel: no i'm mad because everyone else is immoral but me
Stephanopoulos: dood that's stupid you can't win
Gravel: i will win
Stephanopoulos: yur just in it for attention
Gravel: that's how you win dood
Stephanopoulos: so yur so delusional you think you can win
Gravel: bet you 5 bees on it
[ break ]
Steph: scooter libby commutation yes or no
Rich Lowry: a full pardon would have been better but I believe that the jury was wrong, also wrong were the Dept. of Justice, Fitzgerald, the Republican judge, the american people, reality, facts, gravity, the sun, moon stars, Jesus and God
Katrina vanden Heuvel: it’s crony justice - look every american gets it, he did his buddy a favor in the face of his conviction and also he pardoned a guy who can finger him
Fareed Zakaria: this may have been wrong but the independent counsel statute is also wrong and what's the deal with this monarchical pardon tradition, get rid of it
Lowry: white beltway pundits shouldn't have to follow the law
Heuvel: remember how Bush mocked karla fay tucker he has no real compassion for people who have not sworn fealty to him
Stephanopoulos: should they hold hearings
Heuvel: yes expose the consipiracy!
Lowry: what she says just proves my point Dick Armitage was a liberal ACLU bush-hater ergo Nadine Strossen should be arrested
Zakaria: dood he was convicted of a crime in a court of law
Lowry: no look the magic words "criminalization of politics" means that no white man can ever go to jail for anything -- its the new "abracadabra"
Stephanopoulos: all the money going to Democrats
Lowry: so true the energy is with the Dems
Heuvel: no its the 'ideas primary' Dems talk about health care and Republicans talk about best methods of torture
Stephanopoulos: we should compromise and have a National Torture Plan
Lowry: i say that’s a capital idea
Stephanopoulos: i wuz just kidding
Heuvel: Baker-Hamilton could be the beginning of a withdrawal but it's also not a great idea
Lowry: Democrats are still split too between some who want to leave totally and those who are afraid of looking weak
Steph: i've noticed that
Lowry: isn’t it ironic is we're winning in Iraq right now!!!
Zakaria: only if yur Alaniz Morizzette
************************************************************************
This Week With George Stephanopoulos on ABC
July 8, 2007
Guests: Ron Paul, Mike Gravel, Fareed Zakaria, Katrina vanden Heuvel, Rich Lowry
*******************************************************************
Stephanopoulos: Ron Paul you have more $$$ than John McCain what's up
Ron Paul: there are a lot of Americans who actually like freedom and oppose invading Iraq, who knew??!!
Stephanopoulos: you want to leave Iraq but don't we have a responsibility to all the Iraqis who love us and wanted us to invade
Paul: dood we have responsibility to Americans besides the people who now say it would be a disaster said the invasion would be a cakewalk
Stephanopoulos: but that’s so risky
Paul: unlike invading Iraq
Stephanopoulos: more Republicans are coming to your side
Paul: if they don't they will lose elections
Stephanopoulos: Rudy says you said we invited the 9/11 attacks
Paul: the 9/11 commission agrees with me and so does Paul Wolfowitz
Stephanopoulos: any regrets about saying we were attacked because we have a presence in the middle east
Paul: no Rudy is a just a fucking demagogue
Stephanopoulos: do you think Rudy knows better
Paul: well he's a moron and a weirdo but he knows better now
Stephanopoulos: you're an isolationist
Paul: no i want to trade with people and be friends did you know that invading Iraq was a great gift to Osama bin Laden
Stephanopoulos: why are you running as a Republican
Paul: dood i was elected to Congress as 10 times as a Republican -- why shouldn't I
Stephanopoulos: you're a crank who won't interact with the government
Paul: that's how i roll
Stephanopoulos: you can't possibly win
Paul: are you willing to bet all the money you have on that
Stephanopoulos: yes
[ break ]
Stephanopoulos: Mike Gravel yur completely crazy what's up
Gravel: no i throw rocks in the lake and its like throwing rocks at the Democratic party
Stephanopoulos: you say the other candidates are immoral
Gravel: they should end the war right now if they don't it's morally wrong
Stephanopoulos: dood you want indict the President in a court of law
Gravel: damm right
Stephanopoulos: they don't have the votes
Gravel: yes they do because i say they do
Stephanopoulos: dood you were a crank during the Vietnam war too
Gravel: yes i could have gone to jail for what i did
Stephanopoulos: you say all former war supporters are not qualified but that knocks out everyone but Obama
Gravel: no it disqualifies Obama too because he hasn't personally had Bush arrested and dragged through the streets
Stephanopoulos: dood why don't you do it then
Gravel: i would but Matlock is on five days a week on TBS!!!
Stephanopoulos: you seem to be having fun
Gravel: no i'm mad because everyone else is immoral but me
Stephanopoulos: dood that's stupid you can't win
Gravel: i will win
Stephanopoulos: yur just in it for attention
Gravel: that's how you win dood
Stephanopoulos: so yur so delusional you think you can win
Gravel: bet you 5 bees on it
[ break ]
Steph: scooter libby commutation yes or no
Rich Lowry: a full pardon would have been better but I believe that the jury was wrong, also wrong were the Dept. of Justice, Fitzgerald, the Republican judge, the american people, reality, facts, gravity, the sun, moon stars, Jesus and God
Katrina vanden Heuvel: it’s crony justice - look every american gets it, he did his buddy a favor in the face of his conviction and also he pardoned a guy who can finger him
Fareed Zakaria: this may have been wrong but the independent counsel statute is also wrong and what's the deal with this monarchical pardon tradition, get rid of it
Lowry: white beltway pundits shouldn't have to follow the law
Heuvel: remember how Bush mocked karla fay tucker he has no real compassion for people who have not sworn fealty to him
Stephanopoulos: should they hold hearings
Heuvel: yes expose the consipiracy!
Lowry: what she says just proves my point Dick Armitage was a liberal ACLU bush-hater ergo Nadine Strossen should be arrested
Zakaria: dood he was convicted of a crime in a court of law
Lowry: no look the magic words "criminalization of politics" means that no white man can ever go to jail for anything -- its the new "abracadabra"
Stephanopoulos: all the money going to Democrats
Lowry: so true the energy is with the Dems
Heuvel: no its the 'ideas primary' Dems talk about health care and Republicans talk about best methods of torture
Stephanopoulos: we should compromise and have a National Torture Plan
Lowry: i say that’s a capital idea
Stephanopoulos: i wuz just kidding
Heuvel: Baker-Hamilton could be the beginning of a withdrawal but it's also not a great idea
Lowry: Democrats are still split too between some who want to leave totally and those who are afraid of looking weak
Steph: i've noticed that
Lowry: isn’t it ironic is we're winning in Iraq right now!!!
Zakaria: only if yur Alaniz Morizzette
************************************************************************
Thursday, July 05, 2007
Hardball with Chris Matthews - July 5, 2007
*********************************************************
Hardball with Chris Matthews - July 5, 2007
Guests: Bruce Willis, Ron Christie, Mark Halperin, April Ryan, Robert Wuhl
*********************************************************
Chris Matthews: bruce willis dood you are so sexy do you like the war of terror
Bruce Willis: dood this is just like WWII when the Japanese invaded Poland
Matthews: so true dood
Willis: osama reminds me of that dood in schindler's list
Matthews: hitler
Willis: whatever dood
Matthews: ur an expert on cyberterror
Willis: no i'm not dood
Matthews: you are real hero i luv you i want to be a real fake citizen warrior like u
Willis: i would fight for my country even if it meant spilling my latte on Rodeo Drive
Matthews: the real heroes are not the actors or producers they are of course the stuntmen
Willis: yes so many have made the ultimate sacrifice i mean of course like doing off-broadway theater
Matthews: when people die it's sad
Willis: yeah dead people should be helped its very american to offer people aid after they have been killed
Matthews: even the Moonies think Bush went to far in letting Scooter off
Christie: sentence was way excessive how dare he pursue a criminal charge against a guilty man so sad
Shrum: ha ha ha ha oh wow let me explain something this was pure Cheneyism which means they were obstructing justice to cover up Bush's crimes
Christie: there is nothing to hide blah blah blah
Shrum: oh for fuck's sake
Matthews: but Clinton has all these crimes on his rap sheet why would he weigh in
Shrum: oh fuck you
Matthews: Cisneros was teh big liar but not tied to Bill Clinton and Christie you Crazy-Eyed freak really have to stop coming on my show and stop babbling nonsense
Matthews: ok let's hear from one of the least funny men on the entire planet Robert Wuhl
Wuhl: thanx dood
Matthews: did u nail kim basinger yes or no
Wuhl: yes
Matthews: dood watch out alec baldwin is one crazy dood
The Clintons: Libby pardon wuz illegal and wrong
Matthews: the Clintons are pure evil do you agree
Halperin: you know me what do you think dood i sleep with a George W Bush pillow
Matthews: dood i have one of those
Halperin: hillary is evil she is planning to run for preznit its terrible
April Ryan: anyone who ever pardons anyone is terrible by definition also anyone married to them is guilty too
Matthews: Robert Wuhl will u at least take my hint and hate on the Clintons
Wuhl: it's all a game and no one cares or will remember all this
Matthews: i care
[break]
Matthews: Al Gore killed several people over the weekend will that hurt his chances for President?
Wuhl: most people in Hollywood have killed someone while driving speaking as an actor his real crime is gainging too much weight
Matthews: let me defend the Bush Twins they never killed anyone as far as I know like their dad
Halperin: Gore's life is too fucking good to want to subject himself to scrutiny of Bobblespeaking pundits
Matthews: he is a superstar
April Ryan: he even made Bush admit global warming is real that's pretty amazing
Matthews: thats a good cause my air conditioning bill is outta control
Matthews: edwards can't be the President because he got an expensive haircut
Wuhl: this is not a big story
Matthews: Hah!
Wuhl: Republicans have no principles and Democrats have no spines
Matthews: hes the Breck girl
Halperin: i'm rich and i'm a populist on the other hand Edwards has admitted he once kicked a homeless man on his way to the salon
Matthews: thanx we're out of time
*************************************************************************
Hardball with Chris Matthews - July 5, 2007
Guests: Bruce Willis, Ron Christie, Mark Halperin, April Ryan, Robert Wuhl
*********************************************************
Chris Matthews: bruce willis dood you are so sexy do you like the war of terror
Bruce Willis: dood this is just like WWII when the Japanese invaded Poland
Matthews: so true dood
Willis: osama reminds me of that dood in schindler's list
Matthews: hitler
Willis: whatever dood
Matthews: ur an expert on cyberterror
Willis: no i'm not dood
Matthews: you are real hero i luv you i want to be a real fake citizen warrior like u
Willis: i would fight for my country even if it meant spilling my latte on Rodeo Drive
Matthews: the real heroes are not the actors or producers they are of course the stuntmen
Willis: yes so many have made the ultimate sacrifice i mean of course like doing off-broadway theater
Matthews: when people die it's sad
Willis: yeah dead people should be helped its very american to offer people aid after they have been killed
Matthews: even the Moonies think Bush went to far in letting Scooter off
Christie: sentence was way excessive how dare he pursue a criminal charge against a guilty man so sad
Shrum: ha ha ha ha oh wow let me explain something this was pure Cheneyism which means they were obstructing justice to cover up Bush's crimes
Christie: there is nothing to hide blah blah blah
Shrum: oh for fuck's sake
Matthews: but Clinton has all these crimes on his rap sheet why would he weigh in
Shrum: oh fuck you
Matthews: Cisneros was teh big liar but not tied to Bill Clinton and Christie you Crazy-Eyed freak really have to stop coming on my show and stop babbling nonsense
Matthews: ok let's hear from one of the least funny men on the entire planet Robert Wuhl
Wuhl: thanx dood
Matthews: did u nail kim basinger yes or no
Wuhl: yes
Matthews: dood watch out alec baldwin is one crazy dood
The Clintons: Libby pardon wuz illegal and wrong
Matthews: the Clintons are pure evil do you agree
Halperin: you know me what do you think dood i sleep with a George W Bush pillow
Matthews: dood i have one of those
Halperin: hillary is evil she is planning to run for preznit its terrible
April Ryan: anyone who ever pardons anyone is terrible by definition also anyone married to them is guilty too
Matthews: Robert Wuhl will u at least take my hint and hate on the Clintons
Wuhl: it's all a game and no one cares or will remember all this
Matthews: i care
[break]
Matthews: Al Gore killed several people over the weekend will that hurt his chances for President?
Wuhl: most people in Hollywood have killed someone while driving speaking as an actor his real crime is gainging too much weight
Matthews: let me defend the Bush Twins they never killed anyone as far as I know like their dad
Halperin: Gore's life is too fucking good to want to subject himself to scrutiny of Bobblespeaking pundits
Matthews: he is a superstar
April Ryan: he even made Bush admit global warming is real that's pretty amazing
Matthews: thats a good cause my air conditioning bill is outta control
Matthews: edwards can't be the President because he got an expensive haircut
Wuhl: this is not a big story
Matthews: Hah!
Wuhl: Republicans have no principles and Democrats have no spines
Matthews: hes the Breck girl
Halperin: i'm rich and i'm a populist on the other hand Edwards has admitted he once kicked a homeless man on his way to the salon
Matthews: thanx we're out of time
*************************************************************************
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
Countdown with Keith Olbermann - July 3, 2007
****************************************************
Countdown with Keith Olbermann
July 3, 2007
Guests: Richard Wolffe, David Shuster, Jonathan Turley
****************************************************
For Keith’s Special Comment, click here: Keith Olberman’s Special Comment - Mr. Bush, Resign!
Richard Wolffe: i've met Bush i'm beginning to suspect he is an immoral soulless incompetent fucker
Keith: is this the end for Bush?
Wolffe: no this proves that bush is courageous because he bucks the pollz heh heh heh
Keith: sum it up “he pardoned his buddy” every American gets it
Wolffe: lucky for bush his pet project iraq is going so well ha ha ha ha
Keith: dood where's the luv for our Prez heh
Wolffe: he really is a fucker isn't he
Wolffe: dood Bush consulted a wide group of people about the commutation - god and jeebus and and dick cheney heh heh
Keith: is Cheney in charge
Wolfe: no one can tell but let me tell u Cheney bugged Bush's phone back in 2000 so u figure it out
Keith: friends of libby he should walk because no one was charged with outing Plame
Shuster: jesus investigators could not charge someone with a crime because Libby COVERED UP the crimes up
Keith: was there an original crime committed
Shuster: of course there was as crime as the CIA well knew
Keith: Okay
Shuster: also i might add perjury and obstruction of justice ARE FUCKING CRIMES
Olbermann: they say she Plame was not undercover
Shuster: DOOD SHE WUZ FUCKING COVERT
Olbermann: but probation board said no jail
Shuster: yur 0-5 thats another lie Bush judges so no way dood
Olbermann: are the Bushies all liars
Shuster: They are Really Big Liarz so much so that we must assume he was blackmailing Bush
Olbermann: obstruction of justice isn't a crime is it?
Shuster: it's considered incredibly serious - gee I can't imagine why, unless yur, u know… interested in fucking JUSTICE
Olbermann: was this about squeezing information from Scooter-man
Jonathan Turley: moot point when u have immunity u must testify
Olberman: is cheney a vampire
Turley: Libby’s defense was originally going to throw Cheney under the bus and all of a sudden they didn’t even present a defense and were laughing like those doods who killed those civil rights workers kids
Olbermann: that is fucking appalling
Turley: u know bush has the right commute and guess what congress has the same constitutional right to impeach and they don't need to give a damm reason either
Olbermann: but this was principle ha ha
Turley: look Bush is the dood who is in ecstasy at the thought of an electrocution call me skeptical that he's troubled at 30 months in prison
*********************************************************************
Countdown with Keith Olbermann
July 3, 2007
Guests: Richard Wolffe, David Shuster, Jonathan Turley
****************************************************
For Keith’s Special Comment, click here: Keith Olberman’s Special Comment - Mr. Bush, Resign!
Richard Wolffe: i've met Bush i'm beginning to suspect he is an immoral soulless incompetent fucker
Keith: is this the end for Bush?
Wolffe: no this proves that bush is courageous because he bucks the pollz heh heh heh
Keith: sum it up “he pardoned his buddy” every American gets it
Wolffe: lucky for bush his pet project iraq is going so well ha ha ha ha
Keith: dood where's the luv for our Prez heh
Wolffe: he really is a fucker isn't he
Wolffe: dood Bush consulted a wide group of people about the commutation - god and jeebus and and dick cheney heh heh
Keith: is Cheney in charge
Wolfe: no one can tell but let me tell u Cheney bugged Bush's phone back in 2000 so u figure it out
Keith: friends of libby he should walk because no one was charged with outing Plame
Shuster: jesus investigators could not charge someone with a crime because Libby COVERED UP the crimes up
Keith: was there an original crime committed
Shuster: of course there was as crime as the CIA well knew
Keith: Okay
Shuster: also i might add perjury and obstruction of justice ARE FUCKING CRIMES
Olbermann: they say she Plame was not undercover
Shuster: DOOD SHE WUZ FUCKING COVERT
Olbermann: but probation board said no jail
Shuster: yur 0-5 thats another lie Bush judges so no way dood
Olbermann: are the Bushies all liars
Shuster: They are Really Big Liarz so much so that we must assume he was blackmailing Bush
Olbermann: obstruction of justice isn't a crime is it?
Shuster: it's considered incredibly serious - gee I can't imagine why, unless yur, u know… interested in fucking JUSTICE
Olbermann: was this about squeezing information from Scooter-man
Jonathan Turley: moot point when u have immunity u must testify
Olberman: is cheney a vampire
Turley: Libby’s defense was originally going to throw Cheney under the bus and all of a sudden they didn’t even present a defense and were laughing like those doods who killed those civil rights workers kids
Olbermann: that is fucking appalling
Turley: u know bush has the right commute and guess what congress has the same constitutional right to impeach and they don't need to give a damm reason either
Olbermann: but this was principle ha ha
Turley: look Bush is the dood who is in ecstasy at the thought of an electrocution call me skeptical that he's troubled at 30 months in prison
*********************************************************************
Hardball with Chris Matthews - July 3, 2007
****************************************************
Hardball with Chris Matthews - July 3, 2007
Guests: Bob Bennett, Kate O’Beirne, Chris Cillizza, April Ryan, Pat Buchanan
****************************************************
Chris Matthews: you’re the lawyer for Judy Miller irony she went to jail for a long time and here Scooter walks
Bob Bennett: it’s crazy poor judy never wrote a story and she still went to jail
Matthews: caged heat dood
Matthews: Bush commuted but didn’t pardon so Scooter could still take the 5th and keep Bush’s secrets
Bennett: I'm not a cynic like you i'm getting the vapors at the suggestion that bush is blackmailing Scooter
Matthews: christ dood even i'm not that phony
Bennett: nuttiness runs in my family
Bennett: i just don't get it he's left the issue alive politically
Matthews: it’s the only thing about bush’s presidency that isn’t dead
Bennett: i find it strange - i would have Scooter Libby killed but times have changed i guess
Matthews: who's the winner in all this?
Bennett: scooter libby stupid
Matthews: will the people be outraged
Bennett: Special prosecutor lawrence walsh was so outrageous the whole nation felt that cap weinberger was teh innocent!!!
Matthews: bush said he agreed with the jury but then said judge walton is an activist liberal and so was way totally unfair
Bennett: it’s incredibly nutty what fucking standard was bush using
Matthews: dood teh white male standard
Bennett: I luv that one
Matthews: I visited my BFF Judy Miller in jail it was so Dickensenian the kids with coal on their faces and the debtors selling matchsticks and it was so cold and poor little judy sitting there half naked and freezing and her bosoms heaving i wept the tears of the truly wrought in despair
Bennett: i sense a Tweetygasm i'm leaving
Matthews: scooter got a number prison number ncc-1701A what do you say to 1701B???
Bennett: "sux to be u dood"
Matthews: Scooter Libby wuz Assistant to the President dammitt Bush acts like he some poor unknown victim of an old crazy law
Bennett: Scooter has lost so much after all his reputation is gone - if only he hadn't been caught
Matthews: can he join the bar?
Bennett: now he can pretend that he was never even convicted of a crime
Matthews: dood he should boast about it if he wants to work for the Neocons!
[break]
Bush [on tape]: will i have Scooter killed? wait and see
Kate O'Beirne: it scooter had been in a jail which as we all know is for black people it would have been a travesty
Matthews: pardon yes or no
O'Beirne: total outrage for a cop to investigate a crime what kind of world are we living in???
Chris Cillizza: criminy there are hundreds of people serving 5 years in prison for the same crime and bush and announces its excessive he's impacted prosecutions all over America it's fucking insane!!
O'Beirne: oh i don’t disagree with the jury but you know reasonable can differ so we had better let the white man out of jail just in case
Matthews: what the fuck are you saying???
O'Beirne: well bush is a little stupid so i have to kind of argue around him what he said
Cillizza: it was Republicans all the way you cannot argue that this was politicized
O'Beirne: no it was politicized because Fitzgerald invoked the Vice President
Cillizza: dood the VP was one of the criminals!
O'Beirne: Hillary can't say anything because they hounded Cisneros and Espy and Clinton admitted he committed perjury!!
Matthews: he did not you're such a fucking liar!!
O'Beirne: no Clinton admitted it whereas there is no proof that Scooter was even guilty!!!
Cilizza: you lying nutjob he was convicted by a jury and that still means something in America
O'Beirne:
[ uncomprehending stare ]
April Ryan [on tape]: can we expect an apology from Bush
Snow: fuck you
Ryan: gee thanks bastard
Matthews: man is that guy a dick or what
Ryan: asshole of the first order, yes
Matthews: Snow is an evil fucker
Ryan: centrist republicans are worried
Norm Pearlstine: this is a fucking cover up jeebus christ it's called "obstruction of justice" oh well, they only enforce the laws of the land, no big deal
Matthews: Bush is blackmailing Libby
Pearlstine: damm right he is
Buchanan: [rolls off his MSNBC couch]
Matthews: Scooter the Mute
Buchanan: all those war party mongers fear the Scooter and what he knows
Matthews: ooh dark politics
Buchanan: dood u can talk Bush into anything he's so dumb
Pearlstine: cowardly big baby hid teh announcement
Matthews: lesson?
Norm: Federal shield law!!
Matthews: have a safe 4th of july unless yur in iraq then just hope yur not one of the 2 or 3 guys who get kilt
****************************************************
Hardball with Chris Matthews - July 3, 2007
Guests: Bob Bennett, Kate O’Beirne, Chris Cillizza, April Ryan, Pat Buchanan
****************************************************
Chris Matthews: you’re the lawyer for Judy Miller irony she went to jail for a long time and here Scooter walks
Bob Bennett: it’s crazy poor judy never wrote a story and she still went to jail
Matthews: caged heat dood
Matthews: Bush commuted but didn’t pardon so Scooter could still take the 5th and keep Bush’s secrets
Bennett: I'm not a cynic like you i'm getting the vapors at the suggestion that bush is blackmailing Scooter
Matthews: christ dood even i'm not that phony
Bennett: nuttiness runs in my family
Bennett: i just don't get it he's left the issue alive politically
Matthews: it’s the only thing about bush’s presidency that isn’t dead
Bennett: i find it strange - i would have Scooter Libby killed but times have changed i guess
Matthews: who's the winner in all this?
Bennett: scooter libby stupid
Matthews: will the people be outraged
Bennett: Special prosecutor lawrence walsh was so outrageous the whole nation felt that cap weinberger was teh innocent!!!
Matthews: bush said he agreed with the jury but then said judge walton is an activist liberal and so was way totally unfair
Bennett: it’s incredibly nutty what fucking standard was bush using
Matthews: dood teh white male standard
Bennett: I luv that one
Matthews: I visited my BFF Judy Miller in jail it was so Dickensenian the kids with coal on their faces and the debtors selling matchsticks and it was so cold and poor little judy sitting there half naked and freezing and her bosoms heaving i wept the tears of the truly wrought in despair
Bennett: i sense a Tweetygasm i'm leaving
Matthews: scooter got a number prison number ncc-1701A what do you say to 1701B???
Bennett: "sux to be u dood"
Matthews: Scooter Libby wuz Assistant to the President dammitt Bush acts like he some poor unknown victim of an old crazy law
Bennett: Scooter has lost so much after all his reputation is gone - if only he hadn't been caught
Matthews: can he join the bar?
Bennett: now he can pretend that he was never even convicted of a crime
Matthews: dood he should boast about it if he wants to work for the Neocons!
[break]
Bush [on tape]: will i have Scooter killed? wait and see
Kate O'Beirne: it scooter had been in a jail which as we all know is for black people it would have been a travesty
Matthews: pardon yes or no
O'Beirne: total outrage for a cop to investigate a crime what kind of world are we living in???
Chris Cillizza: criminy there are hundreds of people serving 5 years in prison for the same crime and bush and announces its excessive he's impacted prosecutions all over America it's fucking insane!!
O'Beirne: oh i don’t disagree with the jury but you know reasonable can differ so we had better let the white man out of jail just in case
Matthews: what the fuck are you saying???
O'Beirne: well bush is a little stupid so i have to kind of argue around him what he said
Cillizza: it was Republicans all the way you cannot argue that this was politicized
O'Beirne: no it was politicized because Fitzgerald invoked the Vice President
Cillizza: dood the VP was one of the criminals!
O'Beirne: Hillary can't say anything because they hounded Cisneros and Espy and Clinton admitted he committed perjury!!
Matthews: he did not you're such a fucking liar!!
O'Beirne: no Clinton admitted it whereas there is no proof that Scooter was even guilty!!!
Cilizza: you lying nutjob he was convicted by a jury and that still means something in America
O'Beirne:
[ uncomprehending stare ]
April Ryan [on tape]: can we expect an apology from Bush
Snow: fuck you
Ryan: gee thanks bastard
Matthews: man is that guy a dick or what
Ryan: asshole of the first order, yes
Matthews: Snow is an evil fucker
Ryan: centrist republicans are worried
Norm Pearlstine: this is a fucking cover up jeebus christ it's called "obstruction of justice" oh well, they only enforce the laws of the land, no big deal
Matthews: Bush is blackmailing Libby
Pearlstine: damm right he is
Buchanan: [rolls off his MSNBC couch]
Matthews: Scooter the Mute
Buchanan: all those war party mongers fear the Scooter and what he knows
Matthews: ooh dark politics
Buchanan: dood u can talk Bush into anything he's so dumb
Pearlstine: cowardly big baby hid teh announcement
Matthews: lesson?
Norm: Federal shield law!!
Matthews: have a safe 4th of july unless yur in iraq then just hope yur not one of the 2 or 3 guys who get kilt
****************************************************
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