Wednesday, September 03, 2008

GOP Convention Liveblogging Part I - Sept. 2, 2008

Bachman: jon and sidney mccain adopted a black child

Crowd: oooooohh

Bachman: he was also a not so decent pilot

Crowd: yay

Bachman: barack obama is a selfish coward

Crowd: Yeeaaaah

Bachman: the best way to help people is not to do it

Crowd: wheeee

Bachman: then again we're not heartless bastards after all we need a new generation of soldiers for endless war

Crowd: YAY

Bachman: but let's not forget government should not help people

Crowd: YAY!!!!

Bachman: as Goppers we realize the best charity is keeping your own money and spending it on yachts

Crowd: Wheeeee

Bachman: but the Dems wants to spend your money on black welfare mothers

Crowd: Nooooooooooo

Bachman: we want bloated government to bail out Federal Banks, not Tyra Banks!!!

Crowd: Yaaaaayyy!!!!!

Bachman: thanks and come back to minnesota the land that hairstyles forgot

Crowd: clap clap clap

Dork: cindy mccain travels the world buying children for her white friends in arizona

Crowd: yayyyy

Dork: she does this so the Republican party can have a splash of color at their annual conventions

Crowd: Yaaaaaaay

Dork: i know this seems like the hard way but that's how selfless cindy is

Crowd: woooohoooo

Dork: was she high when she did this - i don't know

Crowd: hmmmmmmmmmm

Dork: but at least she gave them normal american names not like Barack or Twig or Long Jump

Nicky: oh my fucking god this has got to be MOST embarrassing moment of my life

Dork: hey at least you're not Bristol

Nicky: oh christ why me

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