Sunday, May 13, 2007

Meet The Press, May 6, 2007

Meet The Press, May 6, 2007

Russert: Slam-Dunk how are you this morning

Tenet: thats not my name

Tim: Should I call you Slammy?

Tenet: I prefer Mr. Dunk

Tim: ok Dunky Cheney sez Bush invaded Iraq because you told him to

Tenet: we believed Saddam had teh weapons and we were wrong - but Bush would have invaded anyway

Timmy: that may be true but you weren't the pizza delivery boy

Tenet: No that was Andy Card

Timmy: you were teh head of the CIA!

Tenet: dood Bush wasn't skeptical one minute and a believer the next you're being snowed yet again

Tim: Dunk-man why were you helping to market the war?

Tenet: i had to be there every step of the way to prevent the white house from lying and manipulating the intelligence the Powell speech the White House wrote was full of lies

Russert: Slammy, you thought the war was quote crazy - did you crazy like a "wow a crazy-good idea" or ‘crazy’ like “whoa dood this Bush guy is craaaaazy?”

Slam Dunk: i thought it was a bad idea but i didn't have strong feelings about it - if i had said anything i would been dwelling the realm of policy and what do i know - its not like i was the PR man for a baseball team

Russert: so 3,300 americans dead, middle east civil war, 100,000 iraqis dead, US national security in peril….

Tenet: i'm not a hero here

Tim: so Slammy, Cheney was going around lying

Tenet: well u should really read my book - but yeah that was my fault

Tim: But Dunk everyone was lying

Tenet: i'm not perfect

Tim: they said we know where the weapons are

Salmmy: i was very busy that week i was trying to lose weight and American Idol was having a good season

Russert: mushroom cloud?

Dunky: i thought Bush was ordering a pizza

Russert: r u an enabler

Tenet: well they aren't very able, so no

Timmy: u got everything wrong

Tenet: was everything right? no

Timmy: nice pink tie - message?

SlamDunk: im coming out

Tim: gay?

Slam: no just anti-Bush - its very cathartic

Timmster: British sez we fixed intelligence and lied about al-qaeda

Slam-Dunk: true but in our subconscious we didn't think that - that was only what I wrote in an official letter to Congress

Russert: Your report deceived the American people

TenetSlam: i didn't cook the books i would say rather we served the lies cold like that Klingon proverb

Tim: Blaming Saddam for 9/11

Tenet: hey i told Bush and Cheney that was crap what am i supposed to do - have them mouths taped shut

Tim: dood that would have helped

Slammy: i took the 16 words out of a Bush speech and they kept getting put back in

Tim: in Cinncinati

Slam: yeah

Tenet: it was my fault i never read or saw Bush's state of the union speech - i was the designated cabinet member to watch the 'Friends' finale that night

Rusert: where did the Niger thing come from?

Slam Dunk: i have no idea but it rhymes with Chick Deney

Tim: Colin Powell lied

Tenet: yeah i let him down

Russert: let me read preemptively from a letter sent to us from Richard Perle which we never usually do except for neocon nuts

Russert: dood i got the day wrong but Perle is still crazy

Timmeh: June of 2001 - Osama is about to attack

Tenet: yarp

Temeh: July of 2001 briefer sez ‘they're coming here’

Slam Dunk: it had no texture

Timmeh: words like "spectacular", ‘bin laden determined to attack’….

Dunk: yeah I remember that summer teh Yankess and Sox were in a tight race

Tim: u rode in Bush's pickup truck - did the subject of terror ever come up

Slammy: you can go back a look and say we could have done more really it's Bil Clinton's fault

Tim: But Bill Clinton stopped attacks

Slammy: see that's what i talking about he makes us all look bad by being so successful

Russert: Franks, Bremer, Tenet all got the medal of Medal of Freedom - that’s a trifecta of stupid

Slam: i will not give it back - i got it on behalf of other people

Russert: terrorists with nukes?

Salm: we should move heaven & earth

Russert: except for AQ Kahn

Slammy: Khaaaaaaaann!!!!!

Rusert: do u even know what day it is?

Dunk: Sept 12

Timmeh: dood we’re done



Anonymous said...

u r godlike

Anonymous said...

very cool