Sunday, August 09, 2015

This Week with George Stephanopoulos – August 9, 2015

Jonathan Karl
Donald Trump
Gov. Jon Kasich (R-OH)
Matthew Dowd
Sara Fagen
Jon Heileman
Mark Halperin

Stephanopoulos: OMG Donald
Trump is winning everything!

Stephanopoulos: Karl can anyone
stop this runaway train?

Karl: has Trump finally gone too far?

Karl: Famous misogynist Red State
bashed him for insulting women!

Jeb: Trump should apologize!

Trump: Erick Erickson is a loser!

Karl: Trump is a liberal Democrat
who supports the Clintons!

Karl: will Trump fade? please?!

Trump: Jon Karl you're stupid!

Karl: can anyone defeat Trump! Please!

Karl: maybe Rubio!
or Kasich! anyone?!?

[ break ]

Stephanopoulos: we have
Donald Trump on the phone

Stephanopoulos: welcome Mr Trump sir

Trump: make it quick Shorty

Stephanopoulos: everyone hates you

Trump: I have a great relations
with the women

Stephanopoulos: oh?

Trump: Jeb wants to cut health
care for women – he's the real sexist!

Stephanopoulos: so you say

Trump: Carly is terrible for women
I though I respect her but she's an idiot

Stephanopoulos: will you
apologize to Megyn Kelly?

Trump: no she got all hormonal because
I bashed that fat lesbian Rosie O'Donnell

Stephanopoulos: I see

Trump: only a deviant
would think of menstruation

Stephanopoulos: really?

Trump: right – only a truly sick
person would think of something so icky

Stephanopoulos: it's a natural part of life

Trump: periods are gross like 
breast milk and babies' poops

Stephanopoulos: everybody poops

Trump: not me – I excrete gold from my scalp

Stephanopoulos: regardless you
insulted the beloved Megan Kelly

Trump: 'blood coming from your nose'
is a common statement it means 
 'you're angry'

Stephanopoulos: but you didn't say that sir

Trump: you're really stupid

Stephanopoulos: you wrote in a
book that women are 'really killers'

Trump: women are great in business
and phenomenal and I pay them 
a lot of money

Stephanopoulos: okay then

Trump: if you call a man
a 'killer' it's a compliment

Stephanopoulos: it can be

Trump: like my friend Donald Rumsfeld
used to say to his pal Saddam Hussein
'hey killer' and they both loved it

Stephanopoulos: I imagine they did

Trump: our country is too politically
correct and is horrible and terrible

Stephanopoulos: well that's the
country you're trying to be President of

Trump: it's a shitty country

Stephanopoulos: people think 
you hate women

Trump: I am leading in Iowa and
New Hampshire and South Carolina
and in my own mind

Stephanopoulos: amazing

Trump: I'm leading in Georgia and
in national polls and almost all my
supporters are women

Stephanopoulos: you're kidding

Trump: I am phenomenal –  

Stephanopoulos: in 1999 you called
for an extra tax on rich people

Trump: I'm rich I was willing to pay it!

Stephanopoulos: why should conservatives
trust you since their guiding ethos is 
spending money you don't have to 
give more money to rich people

Trump: we should have used that
rich person tax to pay off the national debt!

Stephanopoulos: you were for
single-payer health care too

Trump: and I meant it at the time

Stephanopoulos: can the GOP trust you?

Trump: Ronald Reagan was a Democrat!

Stephanopoulos: that's true

Trump: I have support among
Latino women Democrats

Stephanopoulos: if you say so

Trump: the blacks loves me!

Stephanopoulos: you donated
money to Democrats

Trump: I am a world-class businessman

Stephanopoulos: all right

Trump: buying politicians is
just good business George

Stephanopoulos: is it really?

Trump: they were always
there for me!

Stephanopoulos: you confess
to bribing politicians!

Trump: I am going to make
America great again

Stephanopoulos: you're
openly corrupt

Trump: friends of mine are donating
to Jeb Bush and believe me they
are expecting something for their money

Stephanopoulos: I can't argue with that

Trump: damn right

Stephanopoulos: so you're not backing down

Trump: not at all George

Stephanopoulos: well good luck then

Trump: I'm having a good time
and loving every minute

[ break ]

Stephanopoulos: welcome Governor Kasich

Kasich: good morning

Stephanopoulos: is Donald
Trump killing your party?

Kasich: I want to lift people

Stephanopoulos: Lindsey Graham
says Trump is a real problem for the GOP

Kasich: when I'm the nominee I will
send a positive message of happy talk

Stephanopoulos: I see

Kasich: I want to show poor
people the miracle of America

Stephanopoulos: your entire party
is alienating women

Kasich: not many people
know this but I'm very famous

Stephanopoulos: good point

Kasich: Republicans need to
stop hating everyone and everything

Stephanopoulos: that's a bold statement

Kasich: it's true

Stephanopoulos: will you support
Trump if he's the GOP nominee?

Kasich: [ laughs ] I have to

Stephanopoulos: Erick Erickson won't
vote anyone who doesn't hate women
which that a problem for you

Kasich: I'm a hawk who balanced the budget

Stephanopoulos: right

Kasich: I cut taxes and added jobs

Stephanopoulos: damn Obama economy

Kasich: but we need to help poor
people and the mentally ill and even criminals

Stephanopoulos: man you are nuts

Kasich: I can't help it –
I care about people

Stephanopoulos: are you sure
you're a Republican?

Kasich: I think so

Stephanopoulos: well it sure
doesn't sound like it

[ break ]

Stephanopoulos: welcome panelists

Stephanopoulos: is Trump winning or fading?

Dowd: Trump is popular – with Democrats!

Stephanopoulos: sure he is

Dowd: we live in a bombastic selfie culture

Stephanopoulos: Republicans who
oppose him are willing to oppose him

Fagen: Trump will fade!

Stephanopoulos: I keep hearing that

Fagan: it was a good debate –
there were some really great
candidates no one remembers

Stephanopoulos: how does
Trump pick up steam?

Halperin: he's got a professional
team around him

Stephanopoulos: ok

Halperin: don't assume he's going to fade

Stephanopoulos: true – but he's
pissed off blacks and latinos and
women and homo sapiens

Heileman: I tried to destroy Trump
with a focus group and they didn't
want to hear it – they rationalized and
found excuses for his horrible liberal past

Stephanopoulos: stupid voters
just won't listen to beltway pundits

Heileman: it's crazy!

Brazile: Trump is a horrible
person poisoning the GOP brand

Fagen: Chris Christie was great

Stephanopoulos: except for the lying

Fagen: Republican should feel very good

Dowd: candidates lost a great
opportunity to defend decency

Brazile: Trump a misogynist

Halperin: he hates men too

Stephanopoulos: way to miss the point Halp

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Culture of Truth,

Thanks for the great service you provide in writing these Translations.

Would you consider "translating" the Thu Aug 6 Republican debate? Perhaps also some of the future upcoming debates?

Thanks, and Cheers,