Monday, February 11, 2008

Meet The Press - February 10, 2008


Meet The Press
February 10, 2008
Guest: Gov. Mike Huckabee


Russert: what happened this weekend Cornpone?

Huckabee: i won fatty

Russert: you're way, way behind in delegates

Huckabee: well i don't do math

Russert: you suck

Huckabee: we could go to a convention and then maybe i could lead a Christian revolt

Russert: why not just drop out Bible man?

Huckabee: my supporters are fired up

Russert: well you are the exciting one left in the race

Huckabee: yes i have a pulse

Russert: do you have shot at Virginia

Huckabee: who?

Russert: the state slowpoke

Huckabee: oh that

Romney: the democrats will surrender to muslims

Russert: you are weakening America Squirrel boy

Huckabee: oh fudge i'm allowed to run and will continue to run against Grandma McCain

Russert: you’re a spoiler

Huckabee: hey the Dems aren't done either

Russert: you say McCain alienates human voters

Huckabee: he's a fudging lunatic

Russert: please - your language

Huckabee: i'm trying to maintain a civil campaign

Russert: why hate McCain

Huckabee: election reform, zygote rights, taxes

Russert: Dobby says he wants to kill nascent human beings and has a potty mouth

Huckabee: yes he is weak on economics and the social fabric of this nation

Russert: oh is that all

Huckabee: our founding fathers broke away from Britain so they could outlaw abortion

Russert: Rush Limbaugh says you will destroy America

Huckabee: i love him and his little zingers - but it sounds like the Oxycotin has gone to his fat sex perverted haid

Russert: Rev. Ken Copeland says you called him and begged him to ask Jesus for money and then you will establish a theocracy

Huckabee: i love kenny and he's a big kidder and he has a lot of integrity

Russert: is that phone call true or false

Huckabee: stop hating on Kenny - did you know he was born missing 2 chromosomes

Russert: but you interfered with a congressional investigation

Huckabee: he's got a right to practice his religion to steal from the taxpayers

Russert: not if he broke the law

Huckabee: what about Moveon dot org???

Russert: that's not a religion dumbass

Russert: you flip flopped on tax pledges, Cuba, and smoking

Huckabee: no it's not about what people can't do - it's what they can't do

Russert: oh ok - cuba?

Huckabee: i wanted to export Condi Rice to Cuba

Russert: that makes sense

Huckabee: Grover Norquist has damaging pictures of me

Russert: what are they

Huckabee: my wedding photos

Russert: you flipped flopped

Huckabee: no, i matured

Russert: do you want to be vice president?

Huckabee: no i won't be asked - ha ha

Russert: would you say no?

Huckabee: no because no one would ask

Russert: so you would say yes!

Huckabee: this is an idiotic conversation

Russert: but you might be vice president!!!

Huckabee: who gives a shit???

Russert: you fried squirrel in your dorm room

Huckabee: sure

Russert: did u eat it

Huckabee: duh stupid

Russert: what does it taste like

Huckabee: like squirrel

Russert: well i happened to make some squirrel this morning

[ pulls out plate of orange fried squirrel legs ]

Russert: see i made them with buffalo sauce

[Huckabee takes one]

Huckabee: very tasty timmeh you may have something here

[ Russets put three in his mouth]

Russert: yummy

Huckabee: you should tell Hooters about this

Russert: [slurp]

thanks for coming weirdo

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