Sunday, July 25, 2010

Meet The Press - July 25, 2010

Tim Geithner - Sec. of Treasury
Marc Morial
Anita Dunn
E.J. Dionne
David Brooks
Rick Santelli

Gregory: Tim will things get worse before
they get better?

Geithner: sure but we’re seeing positive signs
and I think most unemployed Americans get that
and sympathize with us

Gregory: oh no doubt

Geithner: look we lived beyond our means for
years but now the party is over and it’s time to sober and pick up the beer cans and passed out drunks
off the lawn

Gregory: will we have another recession?

Geithner: well if we did that would make me look
like an idiot Greggers

Gregory: where are all the jobs?

Geithner: there’s a lot of pent up demand - the economy is like teenage boy ready to explode

Gregory: but those boys have no confidence

Geithner: we have to massage the economy
and buck them up!

Gregory: why not stimulate more?

Geithner: we’re in a transition period

Gregory: so no more stimulus?

Geithner: we can’t deal a stimulus now since we have high unemployment

Gregory: um that was my point Timster

Geithner: government must transition from doing something about the economy to not caring as usual

Gregory: why not pay for unemployment benefits like we do for wars and tax cuts for the rich

Geithner: because that’s fucking stupid Fluffy

Gregory: that’s an outrageous implication

Geithner: it won’t add to the debt moron

Gregory: so why not a big giant stimulus to jump-start the economy?

Geithner: if we do that the Germans will mock me
at the next summit

Gregory: should bankers on welfare get
fat bonuses?

Geithner: yes but only this time and not again

Gregory: how can we prevent another crisis?

Geithner: this new law will add cushions to the economy

Gregory: sounds comfy

Gregory: does it bother you that 25% of our economy are useless fuckers running a giant casino

Geithner: not at all Fluffers

Gregory: how do you solve the housing crisis?

Geithner: lower interest rates and a modest mortgage modification program

Gregory: very very modest I should say

Geithner: well we don’t want to reinflate the
bubble Greggers

Gregory: so should we allow poor people to
own property?

Geithner: sure but in a carefully designed way so the peons and unwashed are not included

Gregory: will you raise taxes on the very rich?

Geithner: Look all those fucking teabaggers are so worried about the debt - well guess what we’re going to be responsible and raise taxes on the top 2%

Gregory: what’s a painful choice you’re willing make to tackle the debt?

Geithner: we’re going to cut spending and raise taxes on the rich

Gregory: what about something really really painful

Geithner: I came on your show

Gregory: Americans have seen their investments
go down and Obama is President

Geithner: they’re gone up since he became President liar

Gregory: [ grins ] well whatever

Geithner: deceitful bubblehead

Gregory: and now let’s talk about why the media can’t get basic facts right

[ break ]

Gregory: Barack Obama was going bring us a wonderful post-racial America - and he’s failed!!

[ grins ]

Shirley Sherrod was wrongly fired - a teachable moment? Do we another beer summit? Some observers say Obama could solve racial problems and others say he’s failed because we still act crazy when it comes to race

Gregory: this is all politically charged - what happened Marc?

Morial: I’ll tell you what happened - that fucker Breitbart yelled fire in a crowded theater

Gregory: I used to love that guy

Morial: we learned that Shirley Sherrod has a fascinating and teachable story and also let me
plug my upcoming conference

Gregory: Let me quote Maureen Dowd

Dunn: oh my god

Gregory: no Dowd has strong words for the
White House

Dunn: yeah maybe the NAACP needs an advisor on black relations too

Gregory: hah ok

Dunn: the media fucked up too Fluffy

Gregory: yes but Obama is insensitive on race

Dunn: jesus he wrote a whole book on race

Gregory: but Obama was supposed to get rid of racial problems

Dunn: look this unhinged lunatic tried to say the NAACP is a racist organization

Gregory: yeah that was funny

Dionne: holy fuck Sherrod gives a positive post-racial speech and the media is so fucking terrified of being called liberal they run with every right-wing story no matter how false and slimy

Brooks: I always check the facts unlike those horrible bloggers

Dunn: eat at an Applebee’s recently Brooksie?

Gregory: is the Tea Party really trying to convince people that Obama is a black racist and whites are the real victims of racism?

Santelli: sure there are a few racists in the Tea Party but only because the Tea Baggers are against welfare for lazy poor people who happen to be black

Gregory: why won’t Obama engage in race and solve racism in America!

Morial: Obama needs a black friend like
Stephen Colbert has

Gregory: that’s a good idea

Morial: the Tea Party compared Obama to the worst people in world history like Hitler, Lenin, Mao and Mel Gibson

Gregory: the left is just as bad!

Dionne: Hey Fluffy Fox News says Obama has a deep seated hatred of white people

Brooks: I have an anecdote - Black people love
the Tea Party

Gregory: Jim Webb helpfully used this moment to tell us that we should get rid of affirmative action and poor white people have suffered the most

Brooks: we live in a gotcha culture - why did people go after poor Tom Vilsack

Dunn: somehow I’m sure the media will find a way to blame Obama

Morial: meanwhile the Senate cut $1 billion in benefits this week

Gregory: what about poor white people?

Morial: yeah it’s real tragedy

Santelli: I just realized in January 2009 that the debt and the deficit is terrible!

Gregory: the stimulus isn’t working well enough

Brooks: people are very scared of the debt
since 2009

Gregory: interest rates are low so let’s borrow
and spend!

Santelli: yes but that could change

Gregory: but it hasn’t

Santelli: well look at Greece

Gregory: so what

Santelli: look we cut spending for all the little people

Gregory: why doesn’t Obama raise taxes on
poor people?

Dunn: because it’s stupid and would hurt
the economy

Gregory: but Democrats believe tax cuts are
a bad idea

Dunn: no liar Democrats voted for them and only believe excessive tax cuts for the rich should
be repealed

Gregory: Obama spoke to angry liberal bloggers this week by telling them he’s trying to keep his promise to let gays serve openly in Gitmo and Afghanistan

Dionne: jesus fuck the rich pay a lower tax rate than poor people do!

Brooks: as an economist I say we should think long term and give a tax credit for ignorant bullshit

Gregory: we’d all get rich!

Brooks: can I get an amen!

Gregory: Marc you’re black - how about
Charlie Rangel?

Morial: hey don’t rush to judgment on that corrupt fucker

Dunn: that’s right he may yet be acquitted of the charges he’s clearly guilty of

Gregory: Wise words indeed


ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Greggers actually sounded sensible when talking to Bankster Tim?


SPN Headlines said...

GADZOOKS! The Middle-Class Task Force report is in.....and it doesn't look good:

Peace! :-)