Sunday, June 22, 2008

MEET THE PRESS - June 22, 2008 with Brian Williams, Joe Biden & Lindsay Graham

Meet The Press
June 22, 2008
Host: Brian Williams
Sen. Joe Biden
Sen. Lindsay Graham

Sitting in for Tim Russert, Brian Williams, but Don't Worry, He'll be Right Back, and in any case, We're Hoping You Won't Notice, or Will Stay Tuned for Another Paen to Timmy

Brian Williams: Ok, let's see if we can get through this

Biden: let my just pay homage to St. Timmy

Graham: dammit now i look like a dick

Russert: Obama you said money is bad and gave your word that you would take taxpayer dollars oh noes!

Williams: but how can we achieve the GOP dream of taxpayer-funded elections!!!??

Lindsey: Obama has broken his word not to take taxes for his campaign and I would like to announce the American people are obsessed with this and this is a game changer

Biden: yeah all 100 million people who donated to him sure noticed

Lindsay: he is a weak black man who is being played like a fiddle on Iraq by the crazies at Moveon

Williams: he cheated by being popular on the Internet

Lindsay: omg he is a calculating politician who cheats by taking positions people like -- the American people won't stand for it

Williams: McCain doesn't take popular positions?

Graham: no he does for example McCain opposed the GOP

Williams: but that is popular

Lindsay: see what i mean???

Lindsay: Obama lied - he must accept tax money!!

Biden: yeah you run with that

Williams: but Hillary attacked him

Biden: Obama beat me and he beat her and he's going to spank your ass to Lindsay

Lindsay: Oooh

Williams: David Brooks say Obama is evil he attracts Scarlett Johanssen and yet he's an untypical democrat he's actually trying to win

Lindsay: yes he's breaking an unwritten code in DC that democrats should lose gracefully

Biden: yeah, he's a naive, green, wet-behind-the-ears, vicious politician

Lindsay: it is so, so, so sad that he's has betrayed America and i thought he was America's Magic Negro!!!

Biden: did you just attack him for trying to win? heh heh

Lindsay: omg a President might re-negotiate a treaty how dare he seize Executive Power!!!

Biden: omg you are truly psychotic

Williams: but Fortune magazine says he wants a dialogue!!

Obama: [ enforce environmental standards ]

Williams: holy shit he might renegotiate!

Lindsay: so, so, so sad he could have been wonderful and now he's made me sad by being consistent

Biden: I'm just curious -- is the whole hour going to be Obama-bashing?

Williams: we're being balanced - we have you and Lindy on to discuss Obama's betrayals

Biden: got it

Williams: rush Limbaugh told me I was being fair

Biden: I’m sure he did

Lindy: we can solve the oil crisis if the liberals will let us drill in America

Biden: they can drill now!

Lindy: but the hidden oil will save America!

Brian: but you said South Carolina would oppose environmental spoliage

Lindy: no it's deep sea exploration way, way, way far away from america

Biden: which they can do now

Brian: now let put on my Intelligent Guy Glasses

Williams: Lindy you said drilling wouldn't help

Lindsay: yeah but $4 dollars a gallon changed reality

Biden: that's stupid

Williams: i met a guy in Afghanistan and he said wow you really, really love to hear yourself talk

Biden: ha ha i know a marine told me the same thing Brian

Lindsay: none of the soldiers in Iraq would shower with me

Biden: if things are going well in Iraq then why don't we leave?

Lindster: sure go ahead and cite the Generals

Lindsay: Saint Petraeus says the central front in the Republican election effort is Iraq

Williams: that's not good news for you

Lindsay: if we leave a war could break out

Biden: uh huh

Lindsay: we have to beat the brains out of al Qaeda

Williams: what about Afghanistan

Lindsay: that's all NATO's fault

Williams: Vice President?

Biden: no

Brian: but what if he asked you

Biden: i would say yes

Brian: that's flip flopping

Biden: no just flopping

Brian: thanks to you both and good luck in retirement Lindsay

No comments: