Sunday, October 20, 2013

Meet The Press – October 20, 2013

Sen. Chuck Schumer (D-NY)
Sen. Tom Coburn (R-OK)
Sec. Jack Lew (Treasury)
Benjamin Netanyahu - PM of Israel
E.J. Dionne
Andrea Mitchell
Maria Bartiromo
David Brooks

Gregory: wow D.C. had a dramatic week!

Brooks: the moderate Republicans
had a manhood injection

Dionne: the era of big Tea Party is over
we wasted $24 billion

Bartiromo: the economy took a hit

Mitchell: the tea party is not done for
but the grown-ups like Paul Ryan will
make a very adult one-year budget deal

[ break ]

Gregory: can you all make a deal?

Schumer: moderate Republicans are
fighters but not crazy

Gregory: ok

Schumer: we could also pass a law
taking the debt ceiling off the table

Gregory: but shouldn't Republicans
keep the threat to wreck America
in order to get what they want?

Coburn: that's stupid

Gregory: I'm still asking

Coburn: I don't blame the tea party –
I blame outside interests who took
advantage of morons in the house

Gregory: is the fight against Obamacare over?

Coburn: it doesn't matter – we have
more debts that the GDP of the country

Gregory: so sad

Coburn: we need leaders to bring
Americans together and cut the
debt after raising it for 30 years

Gregory: isn't Obamacare a failure
and who should be fired?

Schumer: the good news is people
are trying to get on – we were worried
not enough people were going to try

Gregory: let me get beyond
policy and get back to politics

Schumer: oh fuck you Fluffy

Gregory: polls say people hate Congress
should we have term limits?

Coburn: yes we don't have enough
newcomers in the House

Gregory: right

Coburn: we're drunk on spending 
in Washington

Gregory: has the GOP brand been damaged?

Coburn: Washington wastes a lot of money

Gregory: right

Coburn: only sick people are signing
up for Obamacare – healthy people
aren't and won't without stronger penalties

Gregory: are you calling for 
stronger penalties?

Coburn: am I?

[ break ]

Gregory: we got a last minute deal
but don't we still have a crisis?

Lew: yes we do but a least
we didn't default

Gregory: what damage was done?

Lew: it slowed down an already
fragile economy

Gregory: that's not good

Lew: no

Gregory: Republicans are bragging that
they kept the big sequester spending cuts

Lew: those cuts are holding back the economy

Gregory: whose fault is this?

Lew: the tea party you dumbass

Gregory: but Ron Fournier says that
Obama must lead the tea party to reason

Lew: we cut the deficit in half!

Gregory: because of the sequester cuts
which Obama doesn't deserve credit for

Lew: why not?

Gregory: because I say so

Lew: we reduced the deficit but we also
need to create jobs like passing the
farm bill and immigration bill

Gregory: the Obamacare website
is slow which is a disaster

Lew: there is a massive outpouring
of interest which is good

Gregory: yes but Obamacare is
evil and also too slow

Lew: we will fix it

Gregory: can Obamacare survive?!?

Lew: calm down Fluffy

Gregory: I can't!

Lew: the test will be in January when
people are actually enrolled

Gregory: what must Iran do to
get sanctions removed?

Lew: the sanctions are to get Iran
to give up all attempts to build a bomb

Gregory: so enriching less uranium
would mean less sanctions

Lew: no you don't listen – they have 
to stop enriching in pursuit of a 
nuclear weapon no matter the amount

Gregory: thanks Lew

[ break ]

Gregory: Bibi aren't talks a good thing?

Netanyahu: maybe – if we get total
rejection of Iran's nuclear weapons 
program and if we don't have war 
I guess I can live with that

Gregory: Obama may unfreeze Iran's
assets if they take steps to shut
down their weapons program

Netanyahu: now is the time to 
increase sanctions on Iran!

Gregory: it is?

Netanyahu: you don't accept half-way 
measures they don't get to build 
just a few nuclear weapons

Gregory: I see

Netanyahu: Iran supports terrorists

Gregory: what about tougher sanctions?

Netanyahu: Iran should dismantle its
centrifuges and heavy water plutonium

Gregory: what else?

Netanyahu: Iran has oil but even assuming
they want peaceful nuclear energy
they don't need centrifuges or heavy water

Gregory: do like Assad and would 
like to see him in power?

Netanyahu: no because Assad is Iran's puppet

Gregory: oh really?

Netanyahu: yes Iran is Syria and Syria is Iran

Gregory: I love it

Netanyahu: thanks Syrian people are 
suffering and it's Iran's fault

Gregory: what else?

Netanyahu: Iran is responsible for the
tea party, the NY Giants and the Dexter finale

Gregory: my god it's worse than I thought

[ break ]

Gregory: Jim DeMint says Obamacare 
is a disaster!

Dionne: he's wrong

Gregory: but disaster! Disaster!

Dionne: you could be replaced by a 
fluffy parrot

Gregory: disaster!

Dionne: this is going to work

Mitchell: you can apply by phone but 
it's complicated

Gregory: right

Mitchell: they have 60 days to get this
to work or all of Obamacare will completely fail

Gregory: disaster!

Brooks: Obama is good at campaigning
and bad at governing

Bartiromo: growth! Jobs!

Dionne: we should stop outsourcing 
IT to idiots

Brooks: exchanges are a Republican
idea so they shouldn't be too happy 
about the glitches

Mitchell: no one wants to hear from 
Jim DeMint anyway

Gregory: who are the winners and losers?

Dionne: with all due respect to Ron Fournier
Obama won because he dealt with
the tea party like the idiots they are

Mitchell: Mitch McConnell is the winner

Gregory: but Raul Labrador is on my
show every week and he's right to hate Obama

Brooks: Raul Labrador is proof there
is no limit to how dumb someone can be

Gregory: I object to that

Brooks: ok David

Gregory: is Ted Cruz the face of conservatives?

Bartiromo: there are no losers because
people are disgusted with Washington
so basically Obama lost

Dionne: no the people have turned 
on the tea party

Gregory: when is Obama finally going
to prove he can lead the tea party?!?!

Mitchell: that's the real test of 
Obama's presidency – 
both sides are to blame

Brooks: Obama has never proved 
he can lead the tea party – maybe 
he should stop trying

Gregory: maybe

Brooks: Obama should go all in on immigration reform

Mitchell: silicon valley!

Gregory: isn't that a better idea than 
cutting medicare?

Dionne: where have you been fluffy
he just proposed immigration reform!

Gregory: he did?

Dionne: people say Obama should 'lead' 
 they really mean he should adopt 
Republican positions which is not 
leading - it's capitulation

Gregory: liberals have been demanding
Wall Street be punished and now they
are getting hit with massive fines
and may criminal charges

Bartiromo: this will hurt the economy and jobs
Obama keeps slamming Wall Street

Gregory: OMG Hillary might run or President!

Mitchell: she signaled to women that 
she is running

Dionne: well sure

Bartiromo: Business likes Hillary because 
Bill balanced budgets

Brooks: hold on – the nation is mad 
at politicians and liberals don't want 
another triangulating conservative

Dionne: Hillary was a conservative populist

Gregory: what's happening Todd?

Todd: Virginians are mad about the shut down and blame Republicans

Gregory: Ted Cruz?

Todd: Conservatives love him 
– he's a rock star

Gregory: Obamacare is a disaster!

Todd: they need to fire someone 
– that will solve everything

Gregory: thank you – and that's
another episode of Meet The Press

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