Sunday, January 29, 2012

This Week With George Stephanopoulos - January 29, 2012

Newt Gingrich
Speaker John Boehner (R-OH)

Tapper: Newt why are you losing
so badly?

Gingrich: if you add my votes to
Santorum’s than I am winning

Tapper: I see

Gingrich: also unlike me Romney is
negative and mean

Tapper: is that so?

Gingrich: also the Beltway elites are
all against me

Tapper: so who is for you?

Gingrich: Todd Palin and Fred Thompson

Tapper: besides those two idiots?

Gingrich: Ronald Reagan’s corpse
has endorsed me

Tapper: why did you do so badly in
the last debate?

Gingrich: Romney says things that
aren’t true which is unprecedented
for a politician

Tapper: wow

Gingrch: also he is responsible for Columbine,
Virginia Tech and I’m pretty sure he
killed Michael Jackson

Tapper: you have ad saying Mitt Romney
saying killed Kaylee Anthony

Gingrich: Romney has performed dozens
of abortions in the Cayman Islands!

Tapper: amazing

Gingrich: also Romney is a big liar and
lacks character

Tapper: you’re saying he can’t be President

Gingrich: the Federal Election Commission
said I should be President

Tapper: I did not know that

Gingrich: I just want to be positive and
talk about space and how Romney caused
the earthquake in Haiti

Tapper: ok then

Gingrich: I have big ideas and he’s
soooo nasty

Tapper: you want to put an American
base on the moon

Gingrich: I’m big and bold and I have
a plan to have the private sector build a
ladder to the moon

Tapper: that is cool

Gingrich: Washington is terrified of me
because I will spend billions on public works
projects and they hate that

Tapper: Romney says you have no ethics

Gingrich: I agree with you that Obama is
a terrible person

Tapper: umm….

Gingrich: I cut taxes and lowered
unemployment and balanced the budget!

Tapper: you did?

Gingrich: Romney is maniacal!

Tapper: you’re so positive

Gingrich: he’s an utter liar and-

Tapper: I just checked you didn’t balance
the budget

Gingrich: drop dead Tapper you
beltway elitist

Tapper: Obama says you are race-baiting

Gingrich: Obama goes around the country
attacking people which the same as
being a racist

Tapper: I see

Gingrich: he’s a food stamp President because
he didn’t built a pipeline across Nebraska

Tapper: good luck Newt

[ break ]

Tapper: you say Obama is un-American

Boehner: he caused he recession in 2007!

Tapper: will you raise taxes on the
middle class?

Boehner: sadly no

Tapper: what about lower taxes on corporations?

Boehner: Obama has lots of good ideas

Tapper: even though he is unamerican
and a socialist

Boehner: right

Tapper: none your bills can get through
the Senate

Boehner: the US Senate are all poopyheads

Tapper: what’s the point of passing
legislation that’s guaranteed to fail?

Boehner: don’t be hatin’!

Tapper: Bob Dole says Newt is a total nutcase

Boehner: I know Newt and he scares
the shit out of me

Tapper: Do you think Newt is too crazy
to be President?

Boehner: First of rule of opposing Newt is
you don’t talk about Newt

Tapper: got it


No comments: