Sunday, January 13, 2013

Meet The Press – January 13, 2013

Colin Powell
Mayor Cory Booker (D-NJ)
Haley Barbour
Andrea Mitchell
Mike Murphy
Gregory: good morning General Powell

Powell: hello David

Gregory: you think Chuck Hagel would
make a good Secretary of Defense

Powell: he volunteered for combat Vietnam
and was wounded then went to college

Gregory: very admirable

Powell: then he worked for Ronald Reagan
and quit after one year because they
didn't care about veterans

Gregory: wow

Powell: then he founded a cell phone company

Gregory: can you hear me now?!

Powell: and people in Nebraska love him

Gregory: that counts for something I guess

Powell: then he taught at Georgetown and
said a bunch of outrageous things about Israel

Gregory: he sounds ready for the Cabinet

Powell: oh he is

Gregory: Republicans says he is soft
on starting a war with Iran

Powell: he just wants to negotiate before
starting a useless and destructive war

Gregory: it a war with Iran feasible?

Powell: define 'feasible'

Gregory: 'fun'

Powell: well sure is war is great
fun for Beltway reporters

Gregory: he once used the term “Jewish lobby”

Powell: okay he should have used
the term “Israel lobby”

Gregory: yes but others have questioned
his loyalty to Israel and he once said
some nice things about Palestinians

Powell: oh noe

Gregory: does he believe that Israelis
and Palestinians are equal?

Powell: oh no of course not and
neither does Obama

Gregory: Hagel says Bush and Colin Powell
lied to the nation to start a war

Powell: that's not fair – the CIA told us to do that

Gregory: but what you said wasn't true and
thousands of people died for no reason

Powell: Chuck Hagel voted for that war

Gregory: because you told him it was necessary

Powell: we believed Iraq had weapons of
mass destruction and that Saddam would
give them to terrorists

Gregory: that sounded really stupid then
and totally ridiculous now

Powell: I admit also we completely
fucked up the invasion

Gregory: also back in the 1990s Hagel
didn't support gays

Powell: yes but that was before Will and Grace

Gregory: but can he reverse
Don't Ask Don't Tell?

Powell: he doesn't have to – it's been reversed!

Gregory: Hagel says the Pentagon
budget is bloated

Powell: you think?

Gregory: but you can't say that out loud

Powell: hell yes you can

Gregory: but will Chuck Hagel hollow
out the military?

Powell: criminy the people who say that
are the same Republicans who go
on your tv show and say
'we gotta cut spending!'

Gregory: yes but that's bad
spending for poor and old people

Powell: oh ok

Gregory: Obama didn't support Susan Rice

Powell: yeah that didn't go well

Gregory: Hillary Clinton was Secretary
of State when our consulate in
Benghazi was attacked

Powell: hey shit happens

Gregory: would Hillary Clinton
make a good President?

Powell: we've done worse

Gregory: By picking a distinguished
Republican Senator Obama is sending
a rebuke to Republicans

Powell: um I guess

Gregory: by nominating Hagel Obama
is sending a message that we should avoid
the stupid wars of the Bush administration

Powell: hey I was in that Administration

Gregory: oh right I forgot

Powell: look when Bush was President we
wanted to avoid war and believed that if we
must have war go in with overwhelming force

Gregory: how did that go?

Powell: not that great

Gregory: the neocons are jonesing for
another war in the middle east

Powell: they've lost two wars in a row
and should shut up and go away

Gregory: but they're so serious and grown-up

Powell: I'm a hawk who believes in deterrence

Gregory: are you still a Republican?

Powell: I am the Republican in the great
tradition of John Tower and Frank Carlucci

Gregory: excellent

Powell: Republicans seem to hate minorities
and anyone who is not rich

Gregory: I suppose

Powell: also there is a dark strain of
intolerance in the GOP

Gregory: that's a strong charge Colin

Powell: look at the Birther movement
they're all racists

Gregory: some of them perhaps

Powell: also they seem only to care
about wealthy people

Gregory: what about Afghanistan?

Powell: it's up to the Afghan people to defend
themselves against the Taliban

Gregory: should we leave anyone there?

Powell: no – just advisors and military
assistance and SEALS and counter-terrorists
and also lots of soldiers

Gregory: Dick Cheney embraced the
Dark Side and said the United States
should be mean and nasty

Powell: I've known that guy for years and
I can honestly say he is a monster

Gregory: since torture works should we do it?

Powell: nations cannot be lawless or
violate the Constitution

Gregory: but the ends justifies the means!

Powell: no they don't Fluffy

Gregory: what is the solution to
preventing another Newton massacre?

Powell: no more violence on television

Gregory: what else?

Powell: make gun owners run through a screen

Gregory: okay

Powell: no one needs a personal machine gun

Gregory: thanks for coming General

[ break ]

Gregory: Colin Powell says the Republican
party are intolerant

Barbour: well we do have a problem
with those wacky minorities obviously

Booker: both sides we need to be pragmatic
and solve problems

Murphy: Colin Powell has been on a
Democratic bender and Republicans
need a man like Powell again

Gregory: can Hagel get confirmed?

Mitchell: it's up to Chuck Schumer

Gregory: amazing

Mitchell: Hagel also endorsed the President
which could hurt the President's nominee

Gregory: should Obama really have
nominated a Republican who doesn't
love Republicans enough?

Barbour: he's offending Republicans!

Murphy: nominating an old Republican
is very contentious!

Gregory: does Obama hates women
and black people?

Booker: ha ha oh my god

Mitchell: Jack Lew is a white man!

Murphy: ha ha just like Mitt Romney

Barbour: Obama is acting like he's
really President or something

Booker: this is ridiculous

Gregory: we have a lot of gun
massacres in this country

Barbour: yes but killing people is
already illegal

Gregory: but Connecticut rejected
a gun magazine ban

Barbour: if you outlaw guns then
only criminals will have guns and if we
outlaw drugs we will have successful
40 year war on drugs

Murphy: we need to lock up adolscent
males instead of 300 million guns

Gregory: works for me

Murphy: we need investigate people who
clearly have a mental illness

Gregory: how do we find these people?

Murphy: begin with disturbed lunatics
who liveblog the Sunday talk shows

Gregory: it's a start

Booker: we have a lot of gun murders in Newark

Gregory: we all know that

Booker: you can buy tons of guns in
America without a background check
even if you are a terrorist

Murphy: true but there are 100 million guns

Booker: I don't care about the guns in circulation
I want to shut down the loophole market

Murhphy: but the guns are out there

Booker: it's not the guns - it's the people

Mitchell: frankly the Beltway media loves
the idea of Obama as a wimp but it
looks like he's ready for a fight

Gregory: Cory you are running for the Senate

Booker: that's true

Gregory: Lautenberg called you
self-abosbed and disresectful

Booker: ha ha I am a politician Fluffers

Gregory: Haley Barbour talk to me
about the Tour de France

Barbour: yall gotta play by the rules

Booker: all the kids are on steroids today

Mitchell: three cheers for the baseball writers
and the Hall of Fame – Mark McGuire disgraced
this otherwise unblemished pasttime

Gregory: America can never be whole until
Steve Garvey is properly honored

Mitchell: you have put it eloquently again as usual

Gregory: and that's another episode
of Meet The Press


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