Guests:
Fmr. Gov. Tim Pawlenty (R-MN)
David Axelrod (Obama Campaign)
Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom (D-CA)
Howard Dean
Paul Gigot
Cokie Roberts  
Peggy Noonan
******************************
Stephanopoulos: wow Romney chose
Paul Ryan to be his Vice President!
Karl: ha Paul Ryan snuck through his 
back door into the woods - 
the media had no clue
Stephanopoulos: we all know that
Karl: it’s not everyone who can fool 
the Beltway media 
Stephanopoulos: Ryan has energized 
this campaign!
Karl: it’s so on now right now!
Stephanopoulos: but they aren’t 
campaigning together
Karl: it’s divide and conquer
Stephanopoulos: do even know 
what ‘divide and conquers means?
Karl: um
Stephanopoulos: Axel what 
about Paul Ryan?
Axelrod: he’s a scary right-wing 
ideologue who would defund 
science and education
Stephanopoulos: science is overrated 
Axelrod: did I mention he wants 
to privatize social security 
Stephanopoulos: Ryan is going right 
after Obama - does that scare you
Axelrod: Ryan would raise taxes on 
the middle class and give rich 
people a big tax cut
Stephanopoulos: Mitt Romney says 
they will save Medicare from Obama 
who steals money from it
Axelrod: Romney’s plan does the same thing
Stephanopoulos: but Paul Ryan 
is the nominee now
Axelrod: they also turn Medicare 
into a voucher program
Stephanopoulos: that’s good because 
Americans love to clip coupons
Axelrod: Ryan doesn’t even think 
Medicare should exist
Stephanopoulos: will Ryan carry swing states?
Axelrod: only those that hate women, 
medical research and the middle class
Stephanopoulos: a Super PAC ad implies 
Romney was responsible for 
an employee’s wife’s death
Axelrod: Romney approved an ad that 
lies about welfare
Stephanopoulos: still it’s very mean
Axelrod: it’s all true though
[ break ]
Stephanopoulos: Tim you are two-time 
loser in the race for Vice President - 
no offense but that’s kind of pathetic
Pawlenty: [ sobs ]
Stephanopoulos: you must have a sad
Pawlenty: Obama is not an adult
Stephanopoulos: is Paul Ryan an extremist?
Pawlenty: the American people love 
people who tell them hard truths 
and give money to rich people 
Stephanopoulos: that is so true
Pawlenty: the American people realized 
the debt is important in January of 2009
Stephanopoulos: of course
Pawlenty: Obama is the real extremist 
for cutting $700 billion from Medicare
Stephanopoulos: what about the Ryan plan?
Pawlenty: under Ryan’s plan people 
could still stay on Medicare if they want
Stephanopoulos: with $6,000 less
Pawlenty: you would think the President 
would have the courage to cut 
Medicare but he won’t
Stephanopoulos: you just accused him 
of cutting $700 billion from Medicare
Pawlenty: see - he’s evil!
Stephanopoulos: Ryan is only a 
House member and he’s spent life 
inside the Beltway
Pawlenty: don’t worry - Romney and Ryan 
have got the Bush foreign policy 
team advising them
Stephanopoulos: what a relief
Pawlenty: Romney knows all about 
foreign countries - he has bank 
accounts all over the world!
Stephanopoulos: is Romney lying about 
Obama moving people from welfare to work?
Pawlenty: it would be very easy for 
Obama to clear this up - just release 
the President’s orders!
Stephanopoulos:  heh
Pawlenty: Obama should have the 
basic decency to take responsibility 
for a Super PAC ad he isn’t responsible for
Stephanopoulos: will picking Ryan 
change the tone of the campaign?
Pawlenty: Obama surrendered to Russia, 
betrayed the Czech republic 
and keeps raising taxes
Stephanopoulos: actually Obama has cut taxes
Pawlenty: not in my mind
Stephanopoulos: did you give Mitt 
more than 2 years of tax returns 
Pawlenty: damn right I did
Stephanopoulos: sorry about losing again loser
Pawlenty: [ sobs ]
[ break ]
Stephanopoulos: you really wanted 
Paul Ryan didn’t you
Gigot: I’ve known him since he was 
22 years old and Ryan is one of the 
most serious and thoughtful vampires I’ve met
Stephanopoulos: oh good
Gigot: Romney cannot win this election 
attacking Obama so he turned to 
Paul Ryan to close the deal
Dean: hey I’ve got a great idea - 
let’s turn Medicare into a voucher program!
Stephanopoulos: Mitt went with his instincts
Noonan: when Romney was with Bain 
he had a great eye for those who 
could best suck the life out of companies
Newsom: he’s a young good-looking 
policy wonk - what’s not to like?
Stephanopoulos: that says it all Gavin
Newsom: except for alienating all 
old people - and also young people
Roberts: even Catholic bishops attacked Paul Ryan’s budget
Gigot: Obama cut $700 billion from Medicare!
Newsom: So does Ryan 
Gigot: Obama wants unelected panelists 
to cut Medicare - only unelected 
judges should do that
Dean: Romney’s big problem is that 
people think he’s heartless and doesn’t 
care about them - I don’t think bringing 
on a zombie is going to help
Noonan: Spending is out of control 
since 2009!!
Stephanopoulos: wow
Noonan: Ryan must tell old people he 
is trying to save Medicare for their 
grandchildren by getting rid of it for 
their ungrateful children
Roberts: also he must bravely tell rich 
people he is willing cut their taxes 
Gigot: Romney has been very specific 
that he will end loopholes
Dean: name one
Gigot: quit bugging me
Dean: Get rid of Medicare! Are we insane?
Roberts: but Ryan is a good looking young man
Newsom: that is true
Newsom: Ryan wants to cut taxes for 
rich people another thirty percent 
Noonan: blue collar workers ruined California!
Stephanopoulos: do tell Peggy
Noonan: the left and right all know we 
must embrace Paul Ryan’s serious plan 
of wars, tax cuts, bailouts, pork for his 
district and ending Medicare
Gigot: Ryan’s plan is just like Simpson Bowles 
except without higher taxes to pay for stuff
Dean: the man is a radical and a nut
Noonan: it’s a busy bouncy tweeting 
world not worthy of a man like 
Saint Paul of Janesville
Roberts: ending Medicare is open 
to mean demagoguery
Gigot: America is in decline therefore 
we need to turn Medicare into 
a voucher program
Roberts: Do people think Romney 
cares about them?
Gigot: certainly - some of his best friends 
know some regular poor people
Noonan: Democrats want to kill Paul Ryan
Roberts: I like Ryan - he’s cute
Noonan: he’s not the type of person who 
would push his grandmother off a cliff - 
at least not without a good reason
Newsom: forget demagoguery - 
the facts are scary enough
Roberts: Obama has a ridiculous ad with 
silly women talking about their 
“reproductive rights” - it’s pandering!
Stephanopoulos: what should he have done
Roberts: Obama should run an ad 
taking credit for U.S. female Olympic athletes
Noonan: the British disappointed me 
by throwing the Queen out of a helicopter
Stephanopoulos: and there really is 
nothing more to be said
**********************************
Sunday, August 12, 2012
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
 
 
No comments:
Post a Comment