Sunday, December 12, 2010

60 Minutes with John Boehner - Dec. 12, 2010

Stahl: He’s the new Speaker, won one of the biggest elections in decades and is third in line for the Presidency - meet John Boehner!

Stahl: what do you think of Obama?

Boehner: He’s brilliant and good looking

Stahl: he called you a hostage-taker

Boehner: that’s uncalled for and if he doesn’t stop
I will shoot this dog

Stahl: you’re so wonderful

Boehner: I know

Stahl: you disrespected Obama

Boehner: true but he said I am a color that doesn’t exist in nature

Stahl: he has a point

Boehner: [ sobs ]

Boehner [ on tape ]: Hell no we can’t!!

Stahl: you said ‘Hell yes we can cry our eyes out!’

Boehner: sniff sniff

Stahl: you mopped the vomit off the floor in a bar
at 10 years old

Boehner: I had 11 brothers and sisters and one bathroom which will help in running the House

Stahl: you were Kennedy Democrats

Boehner: then I saw the Reagan light and cried my way to the top

Stahl: why did you sob so much on election night

Boehner: I’ve been chasing the American dream all my life

Stahl: what’s that?

Boehner: providing for the safety and security
of the lobbyists who fund me

[ stops, starts sobbing ]

Stahl: have you learned lessons from
Gingrich’s mistakes?

Boehner: I’m going to try avoid being a total asshole

Stahl: you worked with Ted Kennedy

Boehner: he was awesome but in my defense
he charmed everybody

Stahl: Obama says you have to compromise

Boehner: Hell no I don’t!

Stahl: I don’t get it

Boehner: I speak for the American people

Stahl: you compromised on the tax cuts

Boehner: shhh… the tea partiers are loonies

Stahl: will you treat the tea partiers like children?

Boehner: that’s putting it charitably

Stahl: but the tax deal will add to the deficit

Boehner: only spending is bad

Stahl: that’s idiotic

Boehner: I know

Stahl: what will you cut?

Boehner: cut the budgets of committees
in Congress

Stahl: that doesn’t sound like much money

Boehner: true but it’s useless

Stahl: you’re a much better golfer than Obama

Boehner: I know - I’m so awesome

Stahl: why not play golf with Obama

Boehner: playing with little white balls reveals character

Stahl: Mrs. Boehner are you proud of your husband

Boehner: [ starts crying ]

Wife: he’s going through an emotional time

Stahl: I can see that

Boehner: [ sobbing ]

Wife: hell he was a janitor when I met him and now look at him

Stahl: indeed

Boehner: [ blows nose ]

Stahl: well good luck to you both

Wife: thanks Leslie

Boehner: [ baaaaahhhh ]



ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

I watched that.

Totally pathetic.

John Boner, the Oompa Loompa, is going to complete his life's mission of selling out ordinary Americans (for example, those who live in Ohio) to the plutocrats.

And Obama is going to provide him with all the cover and help he needs.


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