Sunday, October 30, 2011

Meet The Press - October 30, 2011

David Plouffe - Obama Campaign
Jennifer Granholm
Walter Isaacson
Tom Brokaw
Mike Murphy
Gregory: what’s wrong in Washington?

Plouffe: the GOP will do anything to protect
rich people

Gregory: let’s talk about the most important
issue in America - Solyndra

Plouffe: we need to fund green energy

Gregory: I don’t see why?

Plouffe: these loan programs are a good use
of government money Fluffy

Gregory: but should government play
venture capitalist?

Plouffe: well you play journalist

Gregory: good one Pluffy

Plouffe: anyway this was a Bush
administration program

Gregory: will you cooperate with a
Congressional subpoena?

Plouffe: yes - if it will create jobs

Gregory: is the President in a funk?

Plouffe: the President is totally funky!

Gregory: he seems depressed about
the election

Plouffe: we ended the Iraq, repealed DADT,
passed health care reform and killed
Osama bin Laden

Gregory: Saint Stephen of the Apple said
to Obama “you’re going to be a
one-term President”

Plouffe: he also created the Lisa

Gregory: blasphemer - Steve Jobs
was a god among men

Plouffe: we were almost in a Depression
when Obama took office

Gregory: how do answer the charge that
Obama did not create the iPod?

Plouffe: the GOP wants to repeal
environmental laws and lower taxes
on the top 1%

Gregory: who will the GOP nominee be?

Plouffe: does it matter - their policies
are all terrible!

Gregory: is Cain for real?

Plouffe: he’s really crazy - but that’s not a
barrier to getting the GOP nomination

Gregory: what about Mitt Romney?

Plouffe: Romney flip-flopped on laws of
abortion, gay rights, taxes and gravity

Gregory: is Obama down with
Occupy Wall Street?

Plouffe: even non-hippies are pissed off
at inequality Fluffy!

Gregory: so will Obama hold a drum circle
in the Rose Garden?

Plouffe: We love the free market but the
Republicans wants Wall street to write its
own rules - that didn’t go so well the first time

Gregory: thanks for coming Pluffer

[ break ]

Gregory: Panel I have noticed some people
like Obama and some don’t

Brokaw: Obama has found his voice ever
since the GOP went completely insane

Gregory: Obama went from Hope & Change
to Funkadelic

Granholm: Obama demonstrated for 3 years
that he was willing to compromise and
now he’s ready for a fight

Gregory: People think the country is on
the wrong track - why isn’t Obama doing worse?

Murphy: Plouffe owes Romney an apology for
calling him a flip-flopper

Gregory: but he is a flip-flopper

Murphy: but it’s not fair!!

Isaacson: I know Herman Cain personally
and he always seemed like a normal person

Gregory: really?

Isaacson: Cain has finally allowed America
to debate whether to give even more money
to the richest people in the country

Brokaw: the GOP is still trying to find a sane
candidate who they actually like

Gregory: that’s not going to be easy

Granholm: Mitt Romney has no principles at all!

Murphy: People love Cain because he is
definitely not from Washington

Gregory: New York Magazine tried to smear
Romney as a rich greedy capitalist slimeball
from Wall Street

Isaacson: that’s completely unfair -
Mitt Romney is from Boston

Brokaw: I was stunned by Cain’s smoking ad -
after all cigarettes do kill you

Gregory: real independent Americans don’t
let the nanny state tell you not to poison
yourself with cancer-causing chemicals

Murphy: that was pot Tom

Gregory: the great debate in America is
whether there is too much inequality or if
the rich are greatly suffering from a
graduated tax

Granholm: oh my fucking god

Murphy: Perry won’t commit to a flat tax -
pull the trigger cowboy!

Gregory: Tom you worry about a lack of
shared national purpose

Brokaw: the elderly’s message is
“I got mine screw you”

Gregory: old people really scare me

Brokaw: we need to make hard calls like
we did in World War Two - why won’t
someone attack America please!

Gregory: will our grandchildren lead better lives?

Brokaw: no of course not

Gregory: speaking of civic identity -
Steve Jobs created his own reality

Isaacson: they call it a reality distortion field
- kind of like watching Meet The Press

Gregory: why can’t Washington leaders
create reality like he did?

Isaacson: because we live in democracy Fluffy

Brokaw: Jobs had a great vision and also
a good idea which helps

Murphy: he thought long-term which is
rare in Washington or America for that matter

Isaacson: he didn’t care about quarterly
profits and look what he accomplished

Gregory: what is the lesson from
Steve Jobs’ life?

Isaacson: cut taxes for the rich and
raise them for the poor

Gregory: what do you think of
Steve Jobs Jennifer?

Granholm: there are people suffering
in this country and it’s not the rich

Gregory: America needs a rich weird
dickish dictator!

Brokaw: Labels are bad! Bipartisanship is good!

Murphy: Plouffe criticized Mitt Romney
for not having principles which is
not bipartisan at all!

Gregory: the poor appear to be getting restless

Isaacson: mister we could use man like
Andrew Jackson again

Brokaw: it’s true Romney is a flipper
but is he a flopper?

Murphy: Rick Perry is the real flip-flopper!

Brokaw: the Republican debates are
mainly watched by junkies

Gregory: indeed hard-core devotees of politics

Brokaw: no I mean actual meth addicts

Gregory: and that’s another episode of
Meet The Press

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