The Chris Matthews Show
March 1, 2009
Matthews: OMG Obama is actually going to withdraw from Iraq!!!
Mitchell: the Iraq war is no fun anymore -- it's time to fuck up Afghanistan!!!
Ignatius: Obama is going to do it thoughtfully - he's such a hypocrite!!
Cooper: we're remissioning and withdrawing at night
Matthews: Noctural remissions!!?!
Inskeep: NPR says our soldiers are teh best!!!
Tweety: will Obama stay in Iraq forever??
Mitchell: he promised he would withdraw and he will
Tweety: that's what all men say
Ignatius: this is Obama's Vietnam
Tweety: So he will stay for a decade and bloggers will be mad
Ignatius: no he won’t - how many ways do you have to hear it??
Matthews: Talk Taliban to me
Mitchell: Afghanistan is Obama's Korea
Cooper: Obama is going to Surge in Afghanistan and look for Al Qaeda
Tweety: maybe they’re on that island in Lost
Inskeep: We can't breathe too hard or we will destablize Pakistan
Ignatius: thank god Obama is going to tell the bloggers fuck off and join the DC consensus and realize there is no military solution in Afghanistan
Matthews: isn't that what bloggers have been saying all along?
Ignatius: yes but DC pundits believe that but want to stay anyway
Tweety: OMG Congressmen are Twittering!!!
bobgraham@tweety: oh man i wuz ahead of my time
Matthews: OMG has Obama already turned America around!?!
Cooper: the Stimulus will make Americans happy and shiny people
Inskeep: Obama is already a failure - even is the stimulus works because it will be government spending
Inskeep: NPR says the deficits are bad!!
Mitchell: we have to give the banks a trillion dollars even though it's very unpopular
Ignatius: the good news prices have fallen so low things can't get any worse
Matthews: what's the bad news?
Ignatius: CEOs have no fucking clue what they're doing
Tweety: tell me things I don’t know!
Cooper: Bibi will reach out Syria
Tweety: he's from Philly!
Inskeep: Iran is like China - they will sell us crappy goods in exchange for us ignoring human rights
Mitchell: Our Vatican Embassy is too big and ugly so we hired a cranky dude to paint the ceiling
Inskeep: the only secure thing in the world in the US dollar
Tweety: [ waves dollar ] hoo boy!!
Obama: i will win over the Cantor!
Tweety: can Obama win anything?
Inskeep: who cares - Obama sucks
Mitchell: Obama will win when he eliminates social security
Ignatius: i want just the kids off my lawn
Matthews: watch me tonight on Celebrity Pundit Apprentice on CNBC 2!!