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Meet The Press
January 27, 2008
Guest: Sen. John McCain
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Russert: you hate Mitt Romney
McCain: he's flip flopped on the Surge which was the Greatest Thing Ever in the History of the Universe
Russert: that and pudding
McCain: that is good also
Russert: what else
McCain: if we listened to Mitt we would have a timetable and Al Qeada would now be having a parade down Times Square
Russert: is Romney a surrender monkey?
McCain: Hillary would withdraw from Iraq to me that is surrender
Russert: Mitt?
McCain: he said the Surge was apparently working
Tim: so?
McCain: it wasn't apparently working it was working
Tim: you're weird
Timmy: americans hate the war and you still love it
McCain: there is no doubt my favorite war has been mishandled
Tim: true
McCain: as long as i can show Americans a really fun occupation they will come around to staying for 100 years
Tim: what's a fun occupation?
McCain: M*A*S*H
Tim: the war was a mistake
McCain: no he used chemical weapons in 1986 so of course we invaded in 2003
Tim: naturally
McCain: the world is dangerous and scary and Saddam had a mustache
Tim: are you kidding
McCain: Oil for Food scandal!
Tim: that's it?
McCain: there will be genocide and chaos in Iraq
Tim: wow the war really was a good idea then
Tim: you lied in teh Debate. to me!!!
Russert: hey i attended the national war college
Tim: kappa delta killa
McCain: that was fun
Tim: you know nothing about the economy
McCain: hey carly fiorina endorsed me!
Tim: didn't they fire her ass?
Russert: you were against the bush tax cuts before you were for them
McCain: look this is very very simple i against cutting the taxes when they were tax cuts but now i am in favor of them because now they would be raising taxes
Russert: huh?
McCain: i was in favor of cuttting spending
Russert: the Iraq was free?
McCain: well teh oil was going to pay for it
Tim: how's that working for you
McCain: fuck you fatty
Russert: you changed your mind about the tax cuts
McCain: look i've said 500 times that i would only support them if i was running for the GOP nomination - i've been totally consistent
Russert: Ricky Santorum says you have an illegitimate puppy with a black lab
McCain: that bitch is lying
Russert: GOP hate you
McCain: yeah but i can beat Hillary
Russert: are and joe lieberman getting married?
McCain: i will embrace him anywhere and anytime and i am not ashamed to say it
Russert: your love has no bounds
McCain: i am proud to have him as a lover and a life partner
Tim: why do you love him so
McCain: he won't surrender to Al Qaeda like the hippies
Russert: illegal immigrants
McCain: all Americans will have to carry around a biometric ID card
Russert: what else
McCain: UAV, cameras, heat detectors, a wall and shoot on sight
Russert: how nice
McCain: ok look if you sign on to our Judeo-Christian crusade you can stay
Russert: will you be president
McCain: yes my friend when pigs fly
Russert: Rush Limbaugh hates you
McCain: i wouldn't share my Oxycotin stash with him at Davos and that fat fuck has never forgiven me
Russert: but GOP is against you
McCain: look i hate brown people and i want to kill more and more and more
Russert: so Rush should support you
McCain: right it's all about hate
Russert: thad cochran says you are an unstable lunatic
McCain: i've always loved him
Russert: why the hate
McCain: we had a bad breakup but i still love him
Russert: thad loathes you
McCain: he's an appropriator and pork barreller
Russert: Bill Clinton says you were Hillary's lover
McCain: i accept his endorsement
Russert: will it be boring
McCain: no we will talk about taxes and radical jihad
Russert: that sounds fucking dull
McCain: ha ha ha ha
McCain: we agree on everything except my zeal to kill exceeds hers
Tim: you have a different philosophy
McCain: indeed kill kill kill
Russert: South Carolina!!!
Todd: Bill drove blacks to Obama and whites to Edwards
Timmy: brilliant!
Todd: repuke of Clintons
Russert: little Caroline haz endorzed Barack
Dowd: it's huge it's like Obama is the real inheritor of the powerful JFK mantle and not Hillary or Bill
Russert: Byron York you look like you are down with the blacks voters
York: Who among us does not like to get jiggy with it?
York: i was talking to my Democrat friend and after surrending to al qaeda in the morning she went to volunteer for Obama
Tim: so sad
York: where the white women at?
Russert: they exploited his blackness and Bob Herbert is mad
Dowd: the Big Dog went right after him
Tim: he is really cool
Dowd: but who is really running here Bill or Hillary
Tim: good point
Dowd: the Onion nailed it
Tim: as they so often do
Russert: Leahy Daschle Kerry say Big Dog is too slobbery
Todd: dood this all about power - plus old personal feelings
Timmy: Politics is about power and snubs and dislikes
Todd: so true
Dowd: she is dependent on Bill
Timmy: i hate a marriage like that
Dowd: they will trash anyone even Alexander Hamilton had an affair
Timmy: they shot that treasury creating bastard
York's Hair: Obama can't rely on black vote anymore
Timmy: not that many chocolate cities
York's Hair: but Iowa is a marsmallow and he won there
Timmeh: people used to like Rudy and now they despise him -- why???
Todd: well people got to know him
Yorkie: no Rudy just had a very very poor strategy
Todd: yeah showing people who he is
Yorkie: so sad
Timmy: he really is a cheap crook isn't he
Dowd: what a fucking flameout the whole 9/11 legacy is trashed
Tim: so what happens now
Dowd: Guiliani Partners will grovel to the Saudis
Todd: Romney has to win in Florida or McCain will be unstoppable
Tim: can he win?
Todd: yes there are a lot of inbred morons in Florda
Timmy: Bill says McCain and Hillary love each other
Dowd: but he says she wants America to surrender
York: McCain is liberal loving jerk
Tim: so he's doomed
York: no because we all hate hillary so much
Dowd: Obama is not the daddy figure he's more like our Magic Negro Child
Tim: he's like the Webster of politics
Dowd: or Gary Coleman he's adorable
Todd: Bill spoke las night not Hillary that was weird
Dowd: it's the Rise of Billary - no can stop it and it can't be reasoned with
Russert: Barack is a black John Connor
Russert: thanks for coming loony
Sunday, January 27, 2008
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