October 18, 2009
White House Advisor David Axelrod
Stephanopoulos: Axel Is it time for Obama to get tough and stick a sharpened screwdriver into John Boehner?
Axelrod: Obama is plenty tough but he’s also thoughtful
Stephanopoulos: When is he going to twist some arms and make Max Baucus cry?
Axelrod: we’ve already accomplished more than you ever did Stephy
Stephanopoulos: Is it true Obama might take away the insurance anti-trust exemption??
Axelrod: ha ha - now what were you just saying about getting tough?
Stephanopoulos: so will you take it away?
Axelrod: We’ll see what Congress does
Stephanopoulos: so will Obama sign it?
Axelrod: Let’s just this conversation didn’t just happen
Stephanopoulos: Are you paying too much attention to President Snowe?
Axelrod: I know people say that but she is our Magic Conservative
Stephanopoulos: who wins this contest - the majority of Americans or Olympia?
Axelrod: we’ll split the difference and give her whatever she wants
Stephanopoulos: Will you pay for this with a tax on Cadillacs?
Axelrod: these high-end health plans cover necessary things like erection pills but unnecessary things like abortion
Stephanopoulos: I see
Stephanopoulos: Republicans says Obama will increase the deficit
Axelrod: yeah well they also say he is a British Indonesian from Nairobi
Stephanopoulos: aha [ scribbles note ]
Axelrod: don’t worry we’ll pay for health care even if we have to take the drastic step of giving a speech saying we will
Stephanopoulos: New economic stimulus - yes or no?
Axelrod: Sure we have to do something - Bush left us a really really crappy economy
Stephanopoulos: Good god man - Goldman Sachs is paying out record bonuses and we gave them billions in free money!
Axelrod: what’s really sad is that they are not lending out the free money we gave them
Stephanopoulos: well what is President Obama going to do about it?
Axelrod: there’s nothing we can do except moral suasion
Stephanopoulos: Whining? That’s all??
Axelrod: we can’t micromanage their pay to employees
Stephanopoulos: It’s taxpayer money?!
Axelrod: [ wrings hands ]
Stephanopoulos: Are you at war with Fox News?
Axelrod: Fox what?
Stephanopoulos: that Fox station
Axelrod: they’re not a news station they’re a propaganda outfit and we’re not going treat them like a legitimate news station
Axelrod: and real news stations like you should be glad because you’re real and they’re a bunch of paid liars
Stephanopoulos: aww you flatter me
Axelrod: you’re such a nice boy too
Stephanopoulos: Rupert Murdoch says you helped their ratings
Axelrod: I don’t care about their rantings
Stephanopoulos: I said ratings
Axelrod: those too