Guests:
Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI)
Sen. Dick Durbin (D-IL)
Mayor Cory Booker (D-Newark)
Jim Cramer
Kimberly Strassel
Mike Murphy
********************
Gregory: wow look at these crazy
violent NATO protestors!
Audience: ooh white people
Gregory: the question for today is how
do we get the economy growing
besides slashing spending?
Audience: ye gods
Gregory: Paul - did austerity in Europe fail?
Ryan: no they just didn’t
have enough austerity!
Gregory: I see
Ryan: we are going to pre-empt austerity
by putting it in place before we have to
Gregory: Do you liberals just want more debt?
Durbin: no the answer is cut spending
but preserving programs which spend money
Gregory: I see
Durbin: Paul Ryan wants to give
rich people $150,000
Gregory: can we cut spending and
have economic growth?
Durbin: yes - we just can’t cut
any popular programs
Ryan: my plan increases spending -
we just slow it down!
Gregory: wow!
Ryan: if we slash the debt now we
can finally bring interest rates down!
Gregory: I hear even Republicans hate your plan
Ryan: that’s only when people found what is in it
Gregory: that sounds like a problem
Ryan: look I just want to cut taxes
for rich people and slash Medicaid
Gregory: the reality is that politicians
can’t agree on the spending cuts I want
Durbin: that is so fucking sad
Gregory: Boehner says wants
to risk default again
Durbin: I was stunned - he almost killed
the U.S. economy last year
Gregory: ha
Durbin: I voted for Simpson-Bowles
and to put everything on the table
and the GOP said no
Gregory: how politically skillful you are
Gregory: Paul Ryan isn’t it true that
Joe Biden is a horrible person
Ryan: yes
Gregory: I’m glad you admitted it
Ryan: Bowles-Simpson is a failure because
it won’t cut health care for old people
Gregory: that’s a shame
Ryan: this election is all about which
vision for slashing the debt is best
Gregory: so will you compromise?
Ryan: that’s all I’ve been doing!
Gregory: how so?
Ryan: We must slash spending before
we are forced to slash spending!
Gregory: are you wiling to raise taxes?
Ryan: yes! by cutting taxes!
Gregory: if you lose the election
will you change your mind?
Ryan: we have a massive debt crisis!
Gregory: Dick what if Governor Romney
wins the election - will you finally cut
taxes for rich people like me?
Durbin: I have a plan with to implement
Simpson-Bowles with Tom Coburn
and he’s a fucking lunatic
Gregory: Obama leads in every poll
but the one I’m putting up now
Durbin: Obama saved the economy Fluffy
Ryan: We can avoid austerity if
we just slash spending!
Gregory: are you going to be
the Vice President?
Ryan: why not me?
Gregory: coming next - if the election
were held today, how confusing would that be?
[ break ]
Gregory: the election won’t solve the debt or cut taxes
Murphy: I know it’s so sad
Strassel: not if Republicans take over everything
Gregory: we can only hope
Cramer: no one like tax loopholes
Gregory: why didn’t Obama cut rich
people’s taxes - he could have gotten
bipartisan agreement on that!
Booker: I like you Fluffy but with
all respect you are an idiot
Greg: let’s look at Romney’s recent
piece of propaganda
[ plays ad ]
Gregory: wow that was a really powerful ad
Cramer: yes but he’s going to get killed on Bain
Strassel: he’s tearing down Obama
and it’s not enough
Gregory: I want to get back to how
wonderful Romney is
Murphy: this election is a race to
define Mitt Romney
Gregory: oh noe
Gregory: Obama says Romney is a
200 year old vampire
Booker: I love Bain Capital
Gregory: everyone I talk to says
private equity is totally awesome
Booker: Obama cuts taxes and
cut spending!
Gregory: great!
Booker: Obamacare rocks!
Gregory: go Cory go
Booker: attacking Bain Capital
is nauseating!
Strassel: Bain is a savior of businesses!
Gregory: how can we persuade people
to vote for Mitt Romney?
Murphy: criticizing Romney on Bain
is the single worst ad in American history
Cramer: firing people is chic
Gregory: le freak c’est chic
Booker: I fired people too and it
was surprisingly fun
Gregory: sweet
Booker: Obama is right on the big issues!
Cramer: Obama saved the auto industry
- let him talk about that!
Murphy: Romney would have also
saved the auto industry
Cramer: bullshit!
Booker: trickle-down economics doesn’t work
Strassel: Obama thinks all private business is bad
Gregory: hee hee
Gregory: a GOP Super Pac wants to
go after Rev. Wright
Murphy: that story was totally unfair to racists
Gregory: this is just like going after
Romney for his Mormon faith which
is not actually happening
Strassel: Obama is smearing Romney
donors so he is the bad guy here
Murphy: it was racist unfair smearing
to say Romney has no political core
just because he has no convictions
Gregory: will Chris Christie be Vice President?
Booker: Would I like him to leave
New Jersey - absolutely!
Gregory: what about Europe?
Cramer: German austerity will lead to
a damn global recession
Gregory: Facebook is a terrible failure
because it’s only worth $100 billion
Cramer: Sell! Sell! Sell!
Booker: scribbling
[ ‘note to self: buy facebook’ ]
Rubio: Obama is terribly divisive!
Gregory: Obama didn’t make Republicans
act normal like he promised he would
Booker: that is the stupidest thing
you’ve ever said Fluffy
Gregory: I disagree - I’ve said
much stupider things
Murphy: they said Romney has no core
which is racist demagoguery
Gregory: and that’s another
episode of Meet The Press
******************************
Sunday, May 20, 2012
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