David Axelrod (White House Advisor)
Lindsey Graham (R-SC)
Tapper: so Dave are you going pass health
care or not?
Axelrod: yes we will crush the health care lobbyists! Maybe
Tapper: President Scott Brown (R-Cosmo) says you are a fascist for passing this bill - isn’t he right?
Axelrod: we’re trying to enact the same plan he never tried to repeal in Massachusetts
Tapper: but the American people hate the bill
Axelrod: no they don’t Jake - they hate the lies they’ve been told about the bill but when you ask them about provisions really in the plan they like it
Tapper: but the Poles!
Axelrod: screw those Slavic bastards
Axelrod: we’re not walking away from this
- we’re taking this fight to the next election
Tapper: no one wants health care reform
Axelrod: it will help the American people so
we’re doing it dammit
Tapper: so will you enact the bill this week or never?
Axelrod: people deserve an up or down vote
on this crappy bill no one likes
Tapper: what about the special deals for individual Senators - like Ben Nelson gets free hairpieces for life
Axelrod: that’s a good point Tapper - for example some states get special benefits if the entire state
is a disaster area but that could apply to every state in the South
Tapper: and Nebraska and Montana
Axelrod: and California, Alaska and Iraq
Tapper: will it reduce the deficit which is terribly important now that a Democrat is President?
Axelrod: sure why not
Tapper: will the House pass a bill on complete faith in the U.S. Senate which is not the greatest idea?
Axelrod: they have to Tapster
Tapper: I’m confused
Axelrod: we already had an up or down vote on
all these bills many times
Tapper: so you will ram Obama’s package down
Axelrod: that’s exactly right Jake
Tapper: John Roberts says he felt threatened by a bunch of angry white Senators
Axelrod: yeah they’re a scary bunch alright
Tapper: but he was surrounded!
Axelrod: I could carve a judge out of a banana
and get better rulings
Tapper: Israel slapped Joe Biden in the face
Axelrod: They sure insulted Joe
Tapper: so what will be the consequences?
Axelrod: if they don’t apologize we will be forced to send Joe Biden there again and again
Tapper: do the new Israel settlements put U.S. lives at risk?
Axelrod: fuck Bibi - you don’t diss Barack Hussein Fucking Obama!
[ break ]
Tapper: Lindsey you say reconciliation is fascist
but you voted for reconciliation when it suited you
Graham: yes but health care affects one sixth
of the economy
Tapper: and Bush tax cuts don’t?
Graham: this is completely different after all we
have a black Democratic President now
Tapper: The Democrats say the people want this bill
Graham: the American people are just sick of
Tapper: meaning what?
Graham: they’re going to cut Medicare!
Tapper: you’re the President’s best friend - is Obama committed to immigration?
Graham: no he doesn’t meet with Republicans every day - it’s so sad
Tapper: what should be do
Graham: let Senator Obama propose a bill and I
will decide whether or not to veto it
Tapper: where is the leadership from John McCain
Graham: give the old man a break - he’s being primaried by a lunatic
Tapper: to be fair last time the GOP killed the immigration bill!
Graham: no that’s not fair - Obama is a sleazy black man cheating and is going to use a trick which we used to use all the time
Tapper: if a Republican works with Obama the teabaggers will kill them
Graham: this Obama character President is arrogant and uppity - who the hell does this black guy think he is?
Tapper: Sen Inhofe says if we close Gitmo swarthy terrorists will run for office in America and install Shaira law in our elementary schools
Graham: we need new laws to suspend the rule
of law in America
Tapper: but then we won’t have any laws at all
Graham: right - we need a legal framework to treat terrorists as warriors
Tapper: how odd
Graham: Gitmo is recruitment tool for terrorists
Tapper: so it’s a threat to American troops?
Graham: yes closing it is still a tough call - we should stop arguing about it since the one thing we can all agree on is that we have arrogant uppity black man in the White House
Tapper: thanks for coming Lindy
posted by Culture of Truth