Meet The Press
February 10, 2008
Guest: Gov. Mike Huckabee
Russert: what happened this weekend Cornpone?
Huckabee: i won fatty
Russert: you're way, way behind in delegates
Huckabee: well i don't do math
Russert: you suck
Huckabee: we could go to a convention and then maybe i could lead a Christian revolt
Russert: why not just drop out Bible man?
Huckabee: my supporters are fired up
Russert: well you are the exciting one left in the race
Huckabee: yes i have a pulse
Russert: do you have shot at Virginia
Russert: the state slowpoke
Huckabee: oh that
Romney: the democrats will surrender to muslims
Russert: you are weakening America Squirrel boy
Huckabee: oh fudge i'm allowed to run and will continue to run against Grandma McCain
Russert: you’re a spoiler
Huckabee: hey the Dems aren't done either
Russert: you say McCain alienates human voters
Huckabee: he's a fudging lunatic
Russert: please - your language
Huckabee: i'm trying to maintain a civil campaign
Russert: why hate McCain
Huckabee: election reform, zygote rights, taxes
Russert: Dobby says he wants to kill nascent human beings and has a potty mouth
Huckabee: yes he is weak on economics and the social fabric of this nation
Russert: oh is that all
Huckabee: our founding fathers broke away from Britain so they could outlaw abortion
Russert: Rush Limbaugh says you will destroy America
Huckabee: i love him and his little zingers - but it sounds like the Oxycotin has gone to his fat sex perverted haid
Russert: Rev. Ken Copeland says you called him and begged him to ask Jesus for money and then you will establish a theocracy
Huckabee: i love kenny and he's a big kidder and he has a lot of integrity
Russert: is that phone call true or false
Huckabee: stop hating on Kenny - did you know he was born missing 2 chromosomes
Russert: but you interfered with a congressional investigation
Huckabee: he's got a right to practice his religion to steal from the taxpayers
Russert: not if he broke the law
Huckabee: what about Moveon dot org???
Russert: that's not a religion dumbass
Russert: you flip flopped on tax pledges, Cuba, and smoking
Huckabee: no it's not about what people can't do - it's what they can't do
Russert: oh ok - cuba?
Huckabee: i wanted to export Condi Rice to Cuba
Russert: that makes sense
Huckabee: Grover Norquist has damaging pictures of me
Russert: what are they
Huckabee: my wedding photos
Russert: you flipped flopped
Huckabee: no, i matured
Russert: do you want to be vice president?
Huckabee: no i won't be asked - ha ha
Russert: would you say no?
Huckabee: no because no one would ask
Russert: so you would say yes!
Huckabee: this is an idiotic conversation
Russert: but you might be vice president!!!
Huckabee: who gives a shit???
Russert: you fried squirrel in your dorm room
Russert: did u eat it
Huckabee: duh stupid
Russert: what does it taste like
Huckabee: like squirrel
Russert: well i happened to make some squirrel this morning
[ pulls out plate of orange fried squirrel legs ]
Russert: see i made them with buffalo sauce
[Huckabee takes one]
Huckabee: very tasty timmeh you may have something here
[ Russets put three in his mouth]
Huckabee: you should tell Hooters about this
thanks for coming weirdo