Guests:
Terry Moran
Alex
Marquardt
Brian
Ross
John
Kerry – U.S. Sec. of State
Benjamin
Netanyahu
– Prime Minister of Israel
Stephanopoulos:
what hell is
going on in Ukraine?
Moran:
Reports are that drunk rebels
are
blocking access to the crash site
Stephanopoulos:
wow
Moran:
rebels won't even let investigators
see
the plane crash
Stephanopoulos:
that's not good
Moran:
families are getting angry
Stephanopoulos:
shit's getting real
Stephanopoulos:
Alex what's
happening in Gaza?
Marquardt:
Israel and Hamas agreed
to
a cease fire to collect the dead but
it
was broken after one hour
Marquardt:
there are 400 Gazans dead
including
over 100 children
Stephanopoulos:
that's bad
Marquardt:
Hamas still fires missiles
into
Israel although most are
intercepted by Iron Dome
Stephanopoulos:
well that's something
Marquardt:
Israel wants to take out
the
Hamas tunnels and weaken
Hamas
but not destroy them
Stephanopoulos:
problem solved
Marquardt:
neither side is backing down
[ break ]
Stephanopoulos:
welcome John Kerry
Kerry:
good morning George
Stephanopoulos:
Hamas calls
Israel's
actions war crimes
Kerry:
fuck Hamas – they need to stop
kidnapping
Israelis and accept a cease fire
Stephanopoulos:
strong words
Kerry:
they keep firing rockets into
Israel
even though Egypt offered a cease fire
Stephanopoulos:
what else?
Kerry:
it's true children in Gaza are being killed – war is ugly
Stephanopoulos:
i've heard that
Kerry:
but Hamas is causing all this
Stephanopoulos:
so we should
just take Hamas out?
Kerry:
everyone has been trying to
talk
sense into Hamas and no one
can
get through to them
Stephanopoulos:
they sound instransigent
Kerry:
don't forget the kidnapping
and
killing of Israeli teenagers
Stephanopoulos:
ok
Kerry:
basically Hamas needs
to
stop being such assholes
Stephanopoulos:
what about Israel's rockets?
Kerry:
Bibi is just protecting
the people of Israel
Stephanopoulos:
right
Kerry:
Hamas does not have the moral
high
ground when they bomb the
people
of Israel who are really very nice
Stephanopoulos:
moving on – is Russia
responsible
for the deaths of Malaysian flight?
Kerry:
Russia arms and trains the
separatists
and encourages them to kill
Stephanopoulos:
go on
Kerry:
the US tracked this missile
and
it came from a Russian system
and
the separatists bragged about it
Stephanopoulos:
ooh snap
Kerry:
then he deleted his tweet
Stephanopoulos:
oops
Kerry:
and now a bunch of drunken
separatists
are stealing dead bodies
Stephanopoulos:
what should
Putin
do right now?
Kerry:
call on the separatists to stop
being
suck fucktards and act like
civilized
human beings instead
of
loutish thieving thugs
Stephanopoulos:
I love it
Kerry:
also stop sending them
weapons
which kill civilians
Stephanopoulos:
what will the US do now?
Kerry:
we already imposed strong
sanctions
and now we need Europe
to
stop being such big babies and
get
with the damn program
Stephanopoulos:
John McCain says
the
world now is worse than in WWII
and
Obama should be killing more people
Kerry:
I can't think of a time where the
U.S.
has been more engaged and
more
respected George
Stephanopoulos:
thanks for coming
[
break ]
Stephanopoulos:
welcome Bibi
Netanyahu:
good morning
Stephanopoulos:
you are killing
civilians
in Gaza
Netanyahu:
we regret that
but it's all Hamas'
fault
– they kill Israelis
Stephanopoulos:
I see
Netanyahu:
Hamas targets civilians
and
then hides behind civilians
Stephanopoulos:
are you worried
that
some people will call what
your
are doing collective punishment
Netanyahu:
we asked the
people of Gaza to please leave
Stephanopoulos:
where are
they supposed to go?
Netanyahu:
that's not an issue Stephy
Stephanopoulos:
oh ok never mind then
Netanyahu:
Hamas wants to
see many civilians
dead
and we love all people
Stephanopoulos:
all right
Netanyahu:
Hamas are just
like al-qaeda – they
don't care
about the people of
Gaza
at all unlike us – we
just
love the people of Gaza
Stephanopoulos:
so why not just
take
out Hamas completely?
Netanyahu:
we pulled out of Gaza
and they turned
it into a Fortress of Terror
Stephanopoulos:
is Israel willing
consider
ending the blockade?
Netanyahu:
what if 80% of America
were under
threat from guns?
Stephanopoulos:
can't imagine
Netanyahu:
we have accepted
many cease-fires
but Hamas
doesn't care about
human life
– we can't reward that
Stephanopoulos:
right
Netanyahu:
I want to thank
Obama for giving us Iron Dome
Stephanopoulos:
you're welcome Bibi
Netanyahu:
Iran cannot be
allowed to have a nuclear bomb!
Stephanopoulos:
thanks for coming
[
break ]
Stephanopoulos:
Ukraine says
the
missile crew were Russian
Ross:
we don't know exactly who pulled the trigger
Stephanopoulos:
does it even matter?
Expert:
not really – this is sophisticated
missile
system only an expert could use it
Ross:
the question is why did Obama
let
Malaysia fly over that area?
Expert:
this is a total escalation!
Stephanopoulos:
can't they tell the
difference
between a passenger jet
and
a military plane?
Expert:
no – they saw a blip
and fired like assholes
Stephanopoulos:
well I can't even
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