Guests:
Hillary Clinton - U.S. Secretary of State
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad - President of Iran
**********************************
Amanpour: Hillary Bibi and Abbas are stubborn - can you make peace in the Middle East ?
Clinton: I’ve dealt with men acting like
jackasses before
Amanpour: what about the settlements?
Clinton: We’re leaning on Bibi
Amanpour: what are you doing
Clinton: we threatened to send Joe Biden to Israel
Amanpour: who is making the biggest leap of heart?
Clinton: Israel is threatened by Iran and the Palestinians are threatened by Israel so it
all works out
Amanpour: are you going to get Abbas on board?
Clinton: sure Obama called him and offered him a luxury box to all games at the new
Giants/Jets stadium
Amanpour: you’ll start a war
Amanpour: what about Lieberman?
Clinton: he’s a touchy lunatic with too
much power in the Senate
Amanpour: I meant Avigdor
Clinton: Oh him too
Amanpour: Is Iran going to build a nuke?
Clinton: they’re very scary
Amanpour: are they morphing into a dictatorship?
Clinton: that was the worst election since the
Florida Brooks Brothers Riot
Amanpour: what about human rights in Iran?
Clinton: when Obama came into office he extended his hand to the religious zealots and political
crazies and it’s clear they are not interested in rational dialogue
Amanpour: we’ll get to the Republicans later
Amanpour: progressives still aren’t sure Obama is on their side since you send so many mixed signals
Clinton: are we talking about the U.S. or Iran?
Amanpour: either one
Amanpour: Ahmadinejad says the sanctions are
as worthless as a used hankie
Clinton: the sanctions are like him - they’re a tool
[ break ]
Amanpour: you released one hiker but what about the others
Ahmadinejad what about all Iranians held by
the U.S. government
Amanpour: are you saying the hikers are only hostages?
Ahmadinejad: I prefer the term bargaining chips
Amanpour: their mothers are very upset
Ahmadinejad so is mine
Amanpour: how is your nuclear bomb going?
Ahmadinejad: we’ve got cameras everywhere
- our nuclear program is like a reality tv show
Amanpour: “The Real Leaders of Iran?”
Ahmadinejad: “Iran’s Got Nukes”
Amanpour: So You Think Can Fool the IAEA
Ahmadinejad: the IAEA is controlled by the U.S.
Amanpour: um yeah ok
Ahmadinejad: we take the sanctions seriously
but they are a joke
Amanpour: right
Ahmadinejad: those harsh sanctions will create
a new era of growth in our economy!
Amanpour: that’s not what I heard Mahmoud
Ahmadinejad: in six months we’ll turn it around
Amanpour: oh my god - a Friedman Unit
Amanpour: you’re going to stone someone to death - that’s fucking crazy
Ahmadinejad: well it’s just one woman what’s
the big deal
Amanpour: now you see why people don’t trust you with nuclear bombs
Ahmadinejad: she was never going to be stoned - it’s all made-up propaganda
Amanpour: is that so
Ahmadinejad: it’s the fault of the United States they’re always saying mean things about us
Amanpour: executions are up 400 percent
Ahmadinejad: I’m making a fascist omlette so I gotta crack a few eggs Christiane
Amanpour: are you going to prosecute your
political opponents
Ahmadinejad: no no those are all independent judges
Amanpour: you are an amazing liar
Ahmadinejad: thanks very much
Amanpour: Fidel Castro called you an anti-semitic whacko
Ahmadinejad: I defer to his big beard
Amanpour: why is Iran becoming so militarized?
Ahmadinejad: you mean like Iraq and Afghanistan?
Amanpour: Will you engage in talks with the U.S. government?
Ahmadinejad I friended Obama on Facebook but did he write back? No!
Amanpour: I’m sorry to hear that
Ahmadinejad : he won’t even follow me on twitter!
Amanpour: I’ll follow you mahmoud
Ahmadinejad: thnx chris ill follow U 2 LOL :)
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Sunday, September 19, 2010
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