Sunday, May 04, 2008

This Week With George Stephanopoulos with Hillary Clinton - May 4, 2008

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This Week With George Stephanopoulos
May 4, 2008
Guest: Sen. Hillary Clinton
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Stephanopoulos: Obama say you are pandering with this silly gas tax holiday idea

Clinton: no no i want the oil companies to pay the gas tax for the summer then they can go back to gouging people

Stephanopoulos: how would that work

Clinton: i would investigate OPEC and Exxon and bring the Hillary Hammer down!

Stephanopoulos: but the oil companies would make more money - that sounds stupid

Clinton: but americans in the middle class work really hard and i love them!!

Stephanopoulos: no economist thinks this a good idea

Clinton: oh sure you're ivory tower doods will say that but i will magically make the oil companies pay the extra

Stephanopoulos: is the holiday permanent?

Clinton: no just in the period while i am running against Obama

Stephanopoulos: it sounds stupid

Clinton: oh sure the latte-drinking elitists would say that

Audience: we have global warming and you want people to drive more!

Clinton: i have a long term plan and i want to have a good debate on whether Obama hates truck drivers

Stephanopoulos: 60% of people think you are dishonest

Clinton: people in NY know that i am not that honest but they are ok with that because i am a fighter

Stephanopoulos: interesting

Clinton: i know human nature

Stephanopoulos: like how

Clinton: you can't trust men - they will cheat on you!

Audience: can you stimulate our manufacturers

Clinton: we can't bring back our lost jobs but we can stop the bleeding

Stephanopoulos: like how

Clinton: stop rewarding companies for moving overseas

Stephanopoulos: wow that's crazy enough to work

Stephanopoulos: jobs are going to China and that was approved by the Clinton administration

Clinton: true but we had a ten year limit and we assumed Bill would be out of office by then

Stephanopoulos: but now you object

Clinton: yes but we have learned much since then

Stephanopoulos: like what

Clinton: we learned i want to be President

Stephanopoulos: but did the Clinton administration suck

Clinton: no you and i were both against NAFTA as you recall

Stephanopoulos: i can't say

Clinton: you're so adorable

Stephanopoulos: has Rev. Right donated to the Clinton Library?

Clinton: well Bill was the first black president

Stephanopoulos: you sold your donor list

Clinton: look that's all Bill - you know i can't control him

Stephanopoulos: if you could Gore would be working on his third term now

Clinton: i was born a poor black child unlike that privileged elitist Barack Obama

Audience: amen!

Clinton: my health care plan will help poor blacks and pre-schoolers and workers and white people and Hispanics and the middle class and students and-

Stephanopoulos: senator stop talking or i will be forced to use force

Clinton: please you could fit in my pocket

Stephanopoulos: if you overturn the pledged delegates and give Obama the shaft won't blacks be angry

Clinton: i'm ahead in the popular vote if you count Michigan

Stephanopoulos: his name wasn't even on the ballot in Michigan

Clinton: well that was his choice

Stephanopoulos: those were the rules

Clinton: fuck the rules

Stephanopoulos: you are a scary lady

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