Sunday, May 04, 2008

Meet The Press - with Barack Obama - May 4, 2008

Meet the Press
Host: Tim Russert
May 4, 2008
Guest: Sen. Barack Obama

Russert: talk to me about your crazy Revered

Obama: look when i joined the church i was committing to Jesus Christ not the cult of Rev Right and when he married me and michelle he didn't yell out "I nao pronuonce you man and wife now kiss the bride and goddamm America!!!!!"

Russert: why did he pop up again

Obama: he's fuckin’ crazy and craves teh spotlight

Russert: he's a looney

Obama: oh i know

Russert: but i'm confused why didn't you disown him earlier

Obama: he's like my white granny - she's crazy too

Russert: i have one like that - she's hates the irish

Obama: i though you were irish

Russert: yeah but the men in my family are a bunch of fuckwits

Russert: but Rev. Right said hate speech on 9/11 when he said our chickens came home to roost

Obama: Bush says the same thing all the time

Russert: yeah but he's like a cowboy - it's so cool

Obama: i get it fat timmy

Russert: but he attacked America

Obama: yes no one in the history of this country has ever said something critical of the USA

Russert: not while wearing a dashiki and wagging his finger

Obama: ah now we have put the proverbial finger on it

Russert: he's not a blue collar Reagan Democrat - they can bash America all they want

Obama: I have gathered as much timster

Russert: ok let's move on a New Topic - what Rev. Right said in 2007

Obama: look he's an retired old man

Russert: you knew he's crazy and yet you didn't turn him into the police

Obama: that's true Tim

Russert: are you a black supremacist

Obama: look it's in my DNA that white and black can get along

Russert: but do you believe blacks are superior

Obama: talking to you Tim i do sometimes wonder

Russert: hey!

Obama: tiger woods jackie robinson bill russell michael jordan Jackie joyner kersee carl lewis jim brown

Russert: ok ok

Russert: will you appoint Wright Secretary of Hating Whitey

Obama: no of course not tim that's my wife's job

Russert: rev right has dominated the headlines

Obama: gee can't imagine why

Russert: you hate white people

Obama: i am part-white jackass

Russert: you look black to me

Obama: oh i know mr. russert - trust me i know

Russert: Do you hate america?

Obama: look Timmy my grandfather fought in WWII and my kenyan father came seeking an opportunity to plant his muslim seed here and have a son who would grow up to destroy America from within

Russert: really??

Obama: no dumbass

Russert: white people hate you

Obama: they like Hillary after all she's famous and i'm so dood with a funny name

Russert: yur out of touch with averge people

Obama: yes hillary is worth $100 million and i'm from a single mom and michelle's dad was a factory worker

Russert: your skin reminds me a of a latte

Obama: oh christ

Russert: blasphemer

Obama: you know what's sacreligous is your nantucket home

Russert: why do hate poor people who have to pay the gas tax

Obama: i have news for Senator Pander-ton -- $28 is not going to lift America out of poverty

Russert: but you once voted for the same thing

Obama: and it didn't work

Russert: so you changed your mind

Obama: yes

Russert: well that is crazy

Obama: look even hillary's people say this is only to get her through indiana - it's unserious pure politics

Russert: but john mccain gave me a hummer!

Obama: TMI Tim

Russert: food is expensive and Timmy needs to eats!!!

Obama: don't single out Ethanol besides we can use prarie grass

Russert: when do i get a flying car??

Obama: well Bush is president so until i get sworn in your are stuck with the SUVs

Russert: should we nuke indiana

Obama: well i was in Gary recently and honestly it wouldn't change it very much

Russert: but we use too much coal

Obama: we are the Saudi Arabia of Coal

Russert: and we are the Breadbasket of Bullshit

Obama: yee haw

Russert: hypothetically if Iran was about to attack Indianapolis would you favor attacking them first

Obama: Iran or Indianapolis?

Russert: Hmmm - Indianapolis

Obama: look Iran has the won Iraq war and we're not accomplishing anything

Russert: but the threat from Iran!

Obama: we should meet with them and tell them to stop meddling with the middle east

Russert: but the hypothetical genocide!!!

Obama: so that's why we invaded - to incite a genocide we must stay to prevent from happening?

Russert: makes sense to me

Hillary [on tape] : I will obliterate Iran!!

Obama: Hillary W. Bush, geez

Russert: but will you respond to this non-existent hypothetical threat???

Obama: iran doesn't even had nukes!

Russert: in my mind they do

Russert: should we have an umbrella of space nukes hovering over saudi arabia?

Obama: i am slightly troubled by this conversation given that is it is after all insane

Russert: just pick a country you would obliterate pleez

Obama: i would re-invade Afghanistan

Russert: well now we're getting somewhere

Obama: also Pakistan

Russert: awesome!

Obama: they need food for their people and we need to catch Osama

Russert: about the election - will indiana be the tie breaker?

Obama: i am trying to tap into the of core spirit of decency of the American people

Russert: holy crap you are screwed

Russert: what if they steal the nomination from you

Obama: i hate john mccain so i would campaign for teh democrats

Russert: but the superdelegates could vote for hillary

Obama: you're assuming they all want to vote her

Russert: of course - otherwise there's no story

Obama: yes i can see that


Anonymous said...

by Publius II

There once was a man named Obama
His life began with drama
An African Muslim father
And a wild white mama

Obama’s white grandparents
They gave him a charmed life
Raised on the beaches of Hawaii
Far from ghetto strife

He went to private schools
Fourteen thousand dollars a year
Working-class white folks
They were nowhere near

He attended Columbia
Then Harvard Law
A very soft and liberal upbringing
Something Americans eventually saw

He then went to Chicago
Nation of Islam, Farrakhan, Black Panthers and Jackson
The only friends he made
All from the extreme left-wing faction

He joined a radical church
His Pastor downright insane
Blacks and whites, he said
Think with different parts of their brain

His church praised a man named Cone
With hateful opinions he was filled
He said white people were “the devil”
And Gods who love whites must be killed

Obama first ran for State Senate
With permission from Chicago’s Marxist King
A domestic terrorist named Ayers
Obama kissed his ring

He wrote a book called “Dreams From My Father”
From start to finish a racist rant
After people finally read it
They later said: “Obama, no we can’t”

He wrote how he rejected his mother’s race
And that Malcolm X was a hero
People had a clear warning
Obama was a dangerous zero

He was then elected to the U.S. Senate
Obama’s ego grew very bold
He barely served a year
I will run for President was the story he told

He spent millions to stage rallies
The crowds would yell and cheer
But then it all fizzled after he said
Typical white folks cling to religion, guns and beer

His wife said America was mean
She was never really proud
Her Black Separatist thesis at Princeton
Became a campaign cloud

People said he was a Muslim
His supporters scoffed and jeered
Then his Black Liberation Church was exposed
And Obama’s ugly head was reared

He tried to recover in a speech on race
The radical left-wing media offered raves
But he said white folks had an “untrained ear”
And abolitionists in Pennsylvania turned over in their graves

He claimed to be a uniter
He would bring people together all at once
But after his speech in Philadelphia
He proved to be a demographic dunce

He wouldn’t cover his heart
As the National Anthem played
It’s a meaningless gesture he said
But Americans felt betrayed

He wouldn’t wear a flag pin
It was against his One World view
It doesn’t matter he said
And the American people stewed

He first called terrorist Ayers his friend
Then said this man he didn’t really know
More deceit and cover-ups
Obama’s lies began to grow

Farrakhan, Jackson and Sharpton
Three of Obama’s greatest fans
He tried hiding them in the closet
So not to further offend the white man

Then came his anti-American Pastor
Obama’s mentor for 20 years
He preened, shucked and jived
White people rose up and sneered

NBC and the New York Times
They tried each day to save Obama’s campaign
But real Americans said “FU”
And Obama spiraled down the drain

The radical left-wing Democrats
A Presidential race lost once again
Is it really a surprise
They’ve lost 7 of the last 10?

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