Host:
Martha Raddatz
Guests:
Ben
Carson
Newt
Gingrich
Robert
Costa
Matthew
Dowd
Donna
Brazile
Bill
Kristol
Raddatz:
OMG in a stunning development
Donald
Trump leads in the polls but
by not as much!
Raddatz:
oh wow Ben Carson
has
almost caught up!
Raddatz:
Carly Fiorina way behind
but
she's surging!
Raddatz:
and Bernie Sanders is
within
seven points of Clinton!
Raddatz:
and I almost forgot
– John
Boehner quit!
Boehner:
hell no!
Tea
party: hell no John
Boehner
has to go!
Boehner:
fuck this shit
Conservatives:
Yaaay!
Karl:
everyone hates the GOP
leaders
in Washington
Karl:
Boehner wanted a Pope to visit
Congress
for 20 years and when he
finally
got one he said 'I'm outta here'
Boehner:
I just woke up and said
'today's the day'
Karl:
he seems positively relieved
Boeher:
zip-a-dee-do-dah
what
a wonderful day!
Raddatz:
welcome Dr Carson
Carson:
hi Martha
Raddatz:
is it good that
John
Boehner is leaving?
Carson:
he was a great
guy
but also a loser
Raddatz:
you think he worked
with
Democrats too much
Carson:
it's time to move on
to
someone really destructive
Raddatz:
you are tied with Donald Trump
Carson:
the American people are thinking
for
themselves and will get us off the
inevitable
path of total destruction we are on
Raddatz:
you say immigrants are from
hardened
criminals from Iraq and Syria
and
Russia – is there any evidence for that?
Carson:
Obama's government says they're
not
terrorists but that's what they would say
Raddatz:
is the federal government
working
against the American people?
Carson:
yes Obama releases murderers
into
our country – what is wrong with him?
Raddatz:
you said Islam is not
consistent with the Constitution
Carson:
no I said all religious
people must
renounce their
religion except Christians
Raddatz:
no you said a Muslim can't be President
Carson:
Islam and sharia are crazy
what
with the fatwas and such
Raddatz:
I see
Carson:
they oppose the rights of gays
which
are enshrined in our Constitution!
Raddatz:
you say we can't take Syria
refugees
because they might be terrorists
Carson:
that's just common sense
Raddatz:
should religion be probable
cause
to execute a search warrant
Carson:
maybe
Raddatz:
you want a large
cyber attack on China
Carson:
right - we cant just sit
around and do nothing!
Raddatz:
okay then
Carson:
also we need to be strong
and
control outer space
Raddatz:
did Kanye West call you?
Carson:
yes I was extremely impressed
with
his business acumen and
I
was hoping he might write music
that
help women learn their value
Raddatz:
would support Kanye
for
President in 2020?
Carson:
why the hell not
Raddatz:
thanks for coming Doc
Carson:
you too Mia
[
break ]
Raddatz:
Newt you saw Boehner recently –
did
you know he was going to resign?
Gingrich:
no but in retrospect it was perfect
– he's
a devout catholic and meeting
the Pope
was the best he could hope
to achieve in this life
Raddatz:
you also quit Congress like he did
Gingrich:
we both faced an angry minority
which
threatened utter chaos
Raddatz:
charming base you've got there
Gingrich:
even if Boehner won the
fight
anyone who supported him
would
face a vicious primary
Raddatz:
what led to this level
of irrational anger?
Gingrich:
everyone loves an outsider –
you
have all the righteousness and
none
of the responsibility
Raddatz:
good point
Gingrich:
this is the wrong time
for someone
like Boehner –
extreme but not insane
Raddatz:
who is going to win the election?
Gingrich:
we're definitely going to the
Presidency
with Trump or Carson or Fiorina
Raddatz:
you're joking right
Gingrich:
no I'm perfectly serious
Raddatz:
all right then
[
break ]
Raddatz:
Boehner quit! Will this cause chaos?
Kristol:
chaos is a ladder
Costa:
Boehner will work with Obama
and
then flee the city ahead of tea
party
pitchforks and torches
Brazile:
the Republicans are in total disarray
Dowd:
the GOP are upset that
are
fewer white people in America
Kristol:
not fair!
Costa:
they want Boehner to be
more aggressive
Brazile:
but they don't have the votes!
Kristol:
Boehner is weak unlike
Margaret Thatcher
Dowd:
the Pope Francis effect
will destroy Donald Trump
Raddatz:
it's stunning that
Carson is catching Trump
Costa:
Trump isn't going anywhere
Kristol:
52% of primary voters want
someone
who have never held elected
office
before – that's amazing
Brazile:
Donald Trump talks
loud and says nothing!
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