Sunday, September 20, 2015

This Week with George Stephanopoulos – September 20, 2015

Jon Karl
Terry Moran
Donald Trump
Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FL)

Stephanopoulos: OMG Donald
Trump is a racist! Who knew?

Karl: Donald Trump said we need
a question about getting rid of Muslims

Christie: Trump is weak!

Trump: I don't have to defend the President!

Karl: 28% of Republicans think Obama wasn't
born in America and although half them think 
he was born in Hawaii

Karl: you were wrong about
where Obama was born

Trump: but lying made me popular
so it was the right thing to do

Stephanopoulos: you're less popular
than your were before

Trump: yes but polls may come out
soon which say I am more popular

Stephanopoulos: was Obama born in America?

Trump: that's old new

Stephanopoulos: yes or no

Trump: I don't talk about it

Stephanopoulos: sure you do

Trump: would Obama defend me?
No! So who's the real victim here? Me!

Trump: someone said my tweets are awesome

Stephanopoulos: but you used to
be obsessed over Obama's birth

Trump: I never raised the issue

Stephanopoulos: yes you did 
– many many times

Trump: no I never did – you were
obsessed with his birth not me

Stephanopoulos: sir that is a lie

Trump: so what – by the rules of the
media you can't point that because
that would be biased so I win

Stephanopoulos: are Muslims a problem?

Trump: Muslims are worse than 
Swedish people

Stephanopoulos: what about Swedish Muslims?

Trump: like the Borg?

Stephanopoulos: what is the problem
with Muslims in America?

Trump: certainly Muslims are a problem


Trump: there are many fabulous ones
but muslims are basically terrorists


Trump: I don't care about saying
the right thing

Stephanopoulos: clearly

Stephanopoulos: what exactly
is the problem with Muslims?

Trump: most are fabulous but the 
Muslims I know think muslims around 
the world are bad

Stephanopoulos: Putin is in Syria

Trump: Obama is weak and no one
fears America anymore because
we're selling our militarily bases

Stephanopoulos: so what do we do about it?

Trump: a lot of people loved
my answers in the debate

Stephanopoulos: how do you get 
Putin out of Syria?

Trump: we would get along like best friends

Stephanopoulos: so because you best
buddies he withdraws from Syria?

Trump: no it's called respect

Stephanopoulos: I see

Trump: we're fighting ISIS which 
is great for Assad

Stephanopoulos: so Assad would 
pull out of Syria because you two 
would be friends?

Trump: no it's all about respect

Stephanopoulos: so would you do that?

Trump: first you have to become friends!
Stephanopoulos: we're going in circles

Trump: life is a chess game

Stephanopoulos: Bobby Fischer 2016

Trump: look no one cares about Syria anyway

Stephanopoulos: you underestimated
Carly Fiorina

Trump: she did a terrible job 
and destroyed HP

Stephanopoulos: true enough

Trump: that broad gives me a headache

Stephanopoulos: pretty harsh

Trump: she's a nice woman
although I don't know her

Stephanopoulos: you said you didn't
try to get casino gambling in Florida

Trump: no I said I never spoke
to Bush about it personally

Stephanopoulos: so you did try
to build a casino Florida

Trump: I do deals all over the world!

Stephanopoulos: thanks for coming Donald

[ break ]

Stephanopoulos: welcome Marco

Rubio: nice to be here George

Stephanopoulos: is this your
breakout moment?

Rubio: these early polls
don't mean anything

Stephanopoulos: why are
these outsiders doing so well?

Rubio: because normal Americans
want to hear about the national debt

Stephanopoulos: of course

Rubio: Americans owe students
loans and poor people live paycheck
to paycheck and they hate the media
for not focusing on the debt

Stephanopoulos: you want to 
repeal Obamacare

Rubio: I would replace it with
refundable tax credits for rich people

Stephanopoulos: is Obama a Muslim?

Rubio: it's a waste of time to
admit Trump's base is racist

Stephanopoulos: I gotta ask

Rubio: poor people with little cash in
their checking account don't what batshit
thing Trump said this week

Stephanopoulos: actually this week
it was Ben Carson who said Islam
is not Constitutional

Rubio: [ facepalm ]

Stephanopoulos: sorry Marco

Rubio: Obama is a Christian and was
born in America and now let's move on

Stephanopoulos: what would you do in Syria?

Rubio: Trump thinks the answer
is to be chummy with Putin

Stephanopoulos: I can see
those two getting along actually

Rubio: Putin has a plan to 
make Russia powerful!

Stephanopoulos: who said he could do that

Rubio: Obama doesn't respect Saudi Arabia
which is sad because they are so wonderful

Stephanopoulos: what would you do

Rubio: lead!

Stephanopoulos: I see

Rubio: Obama's airstrikes are not vibrant

Stephanopoulos: intesting

Rubio: Obama left a vacuum in the
middle east which is sad because it
was one of those cool robotic ones

Stephanopoulos: dammit

Rubio: we must lead!

Stephanopoulos: you miss Senate votes
because you're running for President
Rubio: yes but I still do constituent services

Stephanopoulos: well okay then

Rubio: a lot of votes are stupid anyway

Stephanopoulos: that sounds right

Rubio: I'm missing votes to try to save
the world and I'm not going to apologize for it

Stephanopoulos: is the pope a Marxist?

Rubio: the Pope is 100% right on Christ

Stephanopoulos: Jesus 2016

Rubio: but I disagree with the
Pope on politics sometimes

Stephanopoulos: oh really

Rubio: so he's binding on abortion
but wrong climate change

Stephanopoulos: got it

Rubio: I have no problem with the Pope

Stephanopoulos: thanks for coming

Stephanopoulos: so Terry what's happening in Havana

Moran: thousands of Cubans have
turned out to see the Pope! He's a
bigger draw than One Direction

Stephanopoulos: there's one direction – to heaven!

Moran: this Pope has a very radical
message of helping the poor
Stephanopoulos: that's crazy talk

Moran: he met with Raul Castro 
– remember the Pope helped broker 
the breakthrough with America

Stephanopoulos: oh well all know about that

Moran: this is like when Pope John
Paul II brought down the Berlin wall

Stephanopoulos: that was awesome

Moran: he told the media be a bridge for peace

Stephanopoulos: did he say 
anything about flag pins?

Moran: Americans are getting ready
for the Pope to come to America

Pope: see you in America!

Moran: he's challenging the
powers-that-be in Cuba and America!

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