Sunday, December 21, 2014

Meet The Press – December 21, 2014

Eric Adams - Brooklyn Borough President
David Boies – Lawyer for Sony
Kal Penn - actor
Chris Matthews
Bill Richardson - (D-NM)
Michael Chertoff – fmr Bush White House
Director of Homeland Security
Michael Leiter – Counter-terrorism official
Christopher Hill – fmr. Amb. to South Korea
Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FL)
Sarah Fagan – fmr Bush WH political director
John Nolte – Breitbart News

Todd: holy shit two New York City
cops were shot while sitting in their car

Todd: the killer came from
Baltimore and hated cops

Todd: the union head says the
Mayor has blood on his hands

Adams: we need to come together to heal

Todd: I see

Adams: I was a cop for 22
years so I know hard it is

Todd: are protesters to 
blame for the murders?

Adams: not at all – the blame is 
on the murderer

Todd: you disappoint me

Adams: innocent people
should not die in America

Todd: c'mon say something
horribly controversial

Adams: no

Todd: how do you fix the trust issue
between Mayor and the cops

Adams: It doesn't need fixing -
cops just need to get up every
day and do their jobs

Todd: are you concerned that this
killing of two cops will stop reform?

Adams: no because this is a movement
we're not going to let one sick individual
stop us from improving relations between
police and the community

[ break ]

Todd: who could have guessed
Seth Rogan would start WWIII?

Obama: we can't let dictators dictate
which piece of recycled crap 
Hollywood pushes on us

Sony: we so did not cave!

McCain: grrrr!!!

Obama: the North Korea leaders
are a bunch of big babies

Rob Lowe: Sony is just like 
Neville Chamberlain!

Obama: Boston still ran the marathon !

Todd: David what's your take on Dear Hacker

Boies: look movie theaters got
very specific threats of violence

Todd: fair point

Boies: no one stood up for Sony 
when it counted

Todd: Obama says he would have
called the movie theaters personally
and told them to show the movie
and also be honest and just start
serving popcorn in buckets

Boies: this is a state sponsored 
attack on Americans!

Todd: wow!

Boies: if the NSA exposed someone's
e-mails the whole internet would
have been outraged

Todd: was this terrorism?

Boies: this was a state-sponsored
attack on privacy and people should
stop aiding and abetting it

Todd: could Sony be sued if a
movie theater was attacked?

Boies: maybe – but look these were real
threats and no one stepped up to defend
Sony when the threats were public

Todd: should the government pass
a law saying Sony can't be sued?

Boies: the FBI has been good but
the whole government needs to
get behind stopping these attacks

Todd: should the President
said Sony made a mistake?

Boies: it was good he said we can't
have state-sponsored attacks on Americans

Todd: okay

Boies: but he should have blasted
the attack earlier instead of blaming the victim

Todd: did Sony's decision to cancel
the movie bother your fellow actors?

Penn: look I feel bad for Sony but 
it sets a bad precedent

Todd: what else could they do?

Penn: they could it on pay-per-view 
if they wanted

Todd: is Sony getting what they deserve?

Penn: hey I made a movie about two
dudes in Gitmo and we mocked 
George W. Bush

Todd: you're a conservative
but you defended Sony

Nolte: it's not Sony's job to fight
terrorists – it's their job to make money

Todd: some banks make money
working with terrorists

Nolte: the government should shield
Sony from liability and then we can
all go see the movie

Matthews: Obama had to be Churchill!

Todd: go on Chris

Matthews: we have to be resilient!

Todd: yeah but there are still
active lawsuits from 9/11

Matthews: I get it – Sony should 
get double indemnity - ha!

Todd: who knew North Korea could do this?

Richardson: I sure didn't

Todd: was it terrorism?

Richardson: we need to lean on China

Todd: will this have a chilling effect
and will Hollywood start turning out
derivative crap and terrible remakes and
endless shitty sequels instead the wonderful
inspiring creative art they are known for?

Penn: it's possible Todd

Todd: why are you the only
one who is willing to speak out publicly

Penn: I dunno – why not speak out?

Todd: are actors scared?

Penn: no it's just hard to know else
there is to say – the hack is bad and
the movie should be released if possible

Todd: okay then

[ break ]

Leiter: if it took a Sony hack to get
action on cyber-security there's a silver lining

Todd: was this terrorism?

Chertoff: yes – it destroyed things 
and threatened violence in order 
to change behavior

Todd: what can we do?

Hill: North Korea has a third-world economy
but half of all North Koreans are 
employed as cyber-terrorists

Todd: so what do we do?

Hill: we must take our revenge in secret!

Todd: should we attack back with 
our own cyber-attack?

Leiter: Chuck we live a cyber-glass house!

Todd: is cyber-war unethical?

Chertoff: no it's awesome!

Todd: okay

Chertoff: we should send in a 
covert team to kill Kim Jong-un

Todd: like Seal Team Six

Chertoff: they'd never get far – 
they would need a deep cover

Todd: like maybe a couple of 
athletes or entertainers

Chertoff: right – then they sneak 
out and assassinate him

Todd: we could make a movie about it

Chertoff: right – we could call it 'Getting Kim' 
or 'A Movie About Two Bumbling Guys 
Who Kill The Leader of North Korea'

Todd: problem solved

Chertoff: Obama claims he got this
great climate deal with China just to
save the planet and here Americans
can't see the new Seth Rogen comedy
was it really worth it??

Hill: China is fed up with North Korea
and and is totally sick of their shit

Todd: interesting

[ break ]

Todd: omg Obama is going to
win the Spanish-American war

Todd: Cuban history began in 1959
when the U.S. welcomed Fidel Castro

Todd: here is Castro on Meet The Press

[ plays black and white tape ]

Castro: I see Nixon beating Kennedy
also go Buffalo Bills!

Todd: then JFK invaded with an
army of pigs alienating Cuban-Americans
for a generation

Todd: then the world was nearly destroyed
in a global thermonuclear war but at the
last minute Matthew Broderick stopped it

Todd: then Castro sent us all his criminals
creating a generation of Florida politicians

Todd: then Congress passed the embargo
and America was divided by Elian Gonzalez
and Republicans hated jack-booted government thugs

Todd: then in 2008 candidate Obama
observed the embargo has failed

[ break [

Todd: good morning Marco

Rubio: hi Todd

Rubio: did the embargo work?

Rubio: that's not the point

Todd: it's not?

Rubio: no the point is freedom

Todd: so you admit the embargo failed?

Rubio: the point of the embargo
was not to work – it was leverage
to get democracy and freedom in Cuba

Todd: but the U.S. has normal relations 
with China and Vietnam

Rubio: exactly - we have trade with China
and they have no free internet now

Todd: so as President you would
have an embargo with China?

Rubio: don't be silly – where would Wal-Mart
get all their cheap goods?

Todd: I need 50 socks for $5

Rubio: Obama has betrayed us all!

Todd: you say Obama is soft on 
left-wing dictators

Rubio: that's right

Todd: but he just increased sanctions
on Venezuela so that is isn't true

Rubio: exactly – Obama is a hypocrite too!

Todd: Rand Paul called you an isolationist

Rubio: he's objectively pro-Obama

Todd: I see

Rubio: look I just want Cuba to be from
an autocratic nutty leader and free and
fair elections and if it works there we
might even try it in Florida

Todd: would run against Jeb Bush?

Rubio: yes because he's kind of a doofus

Todd: thanks for coming

[ break ]

Todd: in polls only Mitt Romney
does better than Jeb Bush

Todd: but Rand Paul pulls in
moderates and tea partiers

Todd: meanwhile Hillary is polling in at 80%
but if she doesn't run Elizabeth Warren
does well with the same group that
supported Paul Tsongas and 
Gary Hart and Bill Bradley

Audience: um okay

Todd: Jeb Bush is running –
Sarah you're from BushWorld –
that must be kind of exciting and terrifying

Fagen: there was huge cheer in the room
when Jeb said 'I will run and start four wars'!

Todd: Nolte you're a big wingnut 
- what do you think?

Nolte: Jeb pissed off the base and
that didn't work for McCain or Mittens

Fagen: Jeb was a tea partier
before there was a tea party –
I swear he's really crazy!

Richardson: he could do well because
he's got a Hispanic wife

Todd: he speaks better Spanish than Hillary

Fagen: and better English than George

Richardson: Cuba should release
their political prisoners

Matthews: Peggy Noonan supports
this Cuba deal so I do too

Todd: are we going to have another 
Bush – Clinton race?

Fagen: probably

Todd: is it un-American to have 
family dynasties?

Matthews: who else can the GOP nominate
at least the Democrats have Elizabeth
Warren waiting in the wings

Nolte: Scott Walker can unite the party
he's an asshole from a swing state

Todd: interesting

Nolte: Common Core will sink Jeb Bush

Todd: omg Obama called on only 
female reporters!

Fagen: The Bush White House had
more women than Obama!

Todd: and that's another
episode of Meet The Press


Anonymous said...

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