Jack Lew - Director Office of Management and Budget
Sen. Dick Durbin (D-Il)
Sen. Jim DeMint (R-SC)
Gov. Jon Kasich (R-Ohio)
David Cote - CEO Honeywell
Marc Morial - National Urban League
David Faber - CNBC
Diane Swonk - Mesirow Financial Holdings
Gregory: omg debt ceiling might not be
raised and Rupert Murdoch is almost
out of Horcruxes!
Gregory: Jack is a deal imminent?
Lew: I have no fucking idea
Gregory: will we default?
Lew: all members of Congress agree that
we can’t let that happen so maybe
Gregory: Is Obama insisting on
raising my taxes?
Lew: no he’s also wiling to cut entitlements
Gregory: but my taxes!
Lew: he offered to cut $2 trillion
Gregory: our creditors will say that’s
not nearly enough!
Lew: we’d like to cut $4 trillion
to placate the Chinese
Gregory: 53% of Americans are against
raising the debt ceiling
Lew: most people are idiots
Gregory: Michele Bachmann says
we should default
Lew: she’s one of them
Gregory: what would happen if we
don’t raise the ceiling?
Lew: it wreck the American economy -
other than that no biggie
Gregory: this is Obama’s total failure
of leadership isn’t it
Lew: no Obama inherited a disaster
Gregory: that’s a programmed answer
Lew: it’s true
Gregory: I don’t care
Lew: we all know that David
Gregory: Obama has failed in his job
to make the GOP act rationally
Lew: you are a silly person Fluffy
Gregory: Senator do we have to
raise the debt ceiling?
Gregory: so what’s the solution?
DeMint: cut spending, cap all future
spending, and enact a Constitutional
Amendment to give the Job-Creators®
mints on their fluffy pillows every night
Gregory: [ high pitch squeal ]
OMG he’s right Dick!!!
Durbin: we could put the 10 Commandments
in the Constitution but you try keeping
David Vitter away from prostitutes
Gregory: Americans are disgusted with the
GOP fighting for default and with Democrats’
big spending ways and no one is
willing to compromise
DeMint: we are willing to compromise -
we caved in to Obama on his request to
increase in the debt ceiling to pay for the
bill Republicans ran up when Bush was President
Gregory: that’s a compromise?
DeMint: darn right it is
Gregory: will you yield on your useless
Constitutional amendment and let American default?
DeMint: All hail Moody’s!!
DeMint: now that a black man Democrat
is President I realized we can’t borrow more
any money without bankrupting the nation
Gregory: you seem somewhat detached from reality
DeMint: I’m scared!
Gregory: Dick you worried about the debt
when Bush was President and now it’s higher
Durbin: yeah well it was his policies that
caused this mess in the first place
Gregory: Obama is a bad leader!
Durbin: Fluffy Obama is the most
patient dude ever - no other President would
have sat there while Eric Cantor pouted and
screamed “I want what I want when I want it!”
Gregory: what happens now?
DeMint: Obama needs to propose a
Republican plan - then we can agree
Durbin: in the middle of this crisis the
Senate is going to debate a Constitutional
amendment that can never pass
Gregory: should there be Congressional
hearings on News International?
Durbin: absolutely - Rupert Murdoch is like
some international arch-criminal from
a James Bond villain and a good one -
not one with Roger Moore
DeMint: here’s how you makes the
hacking scandal go away -
Congress needs to enact a Constitutional
amendment to make Fox the only news
organization in the country
Gregory: Governor please explain
what the hell is going on in Washington
Kasich: in my state we cut taxes,
wiped out our debt and Ohio became a
business-friendly fucking paradise!
Gregory: should we default on the debt?
Swonk: people in other countries are astonished
that America would artificially create a
debt crisis that doesn’t exist
Gregory: why isn’t Congress willing to slash
spending in this recession?
Cote: as a businessman I find Washington
Gregory: what’s going on with Rupert Murdoch?
Faber: he used to control events in U.K.
and now all his enemies smell blood -
he’s lost his top aide in Britain, his top editor
in the U.S., and that snake he carries around
his neck was just arrested
Gregory: Jon you used to work for Fox
Kasich: It’s a terrible thing - the real victim
here is poor Rupert Murdoch!
Gregory: I see
Kasich: the real problem is businesses donate
to Democrats who let thugs play sports and
put gay people on my tv
Gregory: this is truly a fascinating “Jobs Summit”
Morial: we needs a plan to create jobs -
not cut the damm debt!
Gregory: why do we have a jobless recovery?
Swonk: because ethical business leaders
like Rupert Murdoch are reluctant to be
seen with politicians
Gregory: good point
Swonk: Sweden did everything right -
they slashed spending and gave businesses
whatever they wanted and 20 years later
unemployment is still high
Gregory: well as long as they 'did everything right'
Faber: Bush didn’t create jobs - which proves
America can’t do it
Honeywell: there’s too much uncertainty!
Kasich: consumer spending is up -
but businessmen need certainty -
certainly lower taxes!!
Morial: consumers are not certain they
will have a job in the future!
Gregory: Obama just has to admit government sucks
Kasich: Businesses are on the sidelines
because the debt is high
Faber: Honeywell has $3 billion in cash!
Swonk: the silver lining is we’ve
had lots of IPOs lately
Faber: Groupon has hired 7,000
new employees which will be great
until the bubble bursts
Kasich: we need to give businesses
vouchers to hire people
Gregory: whatever you say Jon
Gregory: John Boehner says taxes destroys
jobs but Ron Brownstein says jobs go up when
taxes are raised
Kasich: Taxes are just another way for
liberals to spend more giving welfare to
thuggish gay people
Gregory: that is so sad
Kasich: look I’m willing to support
lowering taxes on the rich
Gregory: President Grover Norquist
claims to care about the debt but won’t raise taxes
Morial: there’s a huge tax loophole
lobby industry in Washington!
Gregory: some of those loopholes are very nice
Morial: food stamps did not cause
the damm deficit!
Gregory: why are some rich companies
not paying taxes at all?
Cote: if you really cared about poor people
you would have zero taxes on corporations
Gregory: what else would help the poor?
Cote: eliminate corporate taxes on overseas income
Swonk: if we had no taxes we’d have
no tax lobbyists and no one likes them
Gregory: but Washington can’t agree on anything
Faber: the real question the American
people need to ask themselves is -
what will please our creditors?
Gregory: when are we going to bring
back the housing bubble cause that was awesome
Faber: the only jobs Bush created were
in housing which was all a bubble and
ended in disaster
Gregory: you sir are an official Job-Creator® -
thrill me with your acumen
Cote: if we drilled more in the U.S. gas prices
would go down and people would have more
money and that would create jobs
Gregory: you are indeed a fascinating man
Morial: just raise the damm debt ceiling!
Gregory: a dude on Facebook says both sides
are bickering like kindergarteners
Audience: how does those Facebookers
stay so topical?
Cote: both sides are engaged in mutual asphyxiation
Audience: oh my
Cote: it’s so sad - we can’t be a great power
until we slash taxes even more!
Kasich: God put us in office - that’s why
every American needs to look in the mirror and say
- what taxes can I cut to help businesses create jobs?
Gregory: and that’s another episode
Of Meet The Press