February 21, 2010
Host: Terry Moran
Guests:
Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger (R-CA)
Gov. Ed Rendell (D-PA)
**********************
Moran: hey Governors the economy really sucks
Schwarzenegger: yah but haus sales are up and peeple are getting back to verk
Moran: Ed Pennsylvania sucks like California without the nice weather
Rendell: yes I predict things will go from spectacularly bad to merely horribly crappy
Moran: that sounds great
Rendell: thankfully Obama staved off disaster temporarily
Moran: I noticed the $200 billion jobs bill went
to $15 billion
Schwarzenegger: yah ve need to rebuilt Amerrycah
Moran: oh ok
Schwarzenegger: eff you built it zee peepel vill
come like Ike did ven he come to Ameruricah
Moran: but that was in the 50s when America
didn’t suck!
Rendell: we need jobs that can’t be outsourced
Moran: like what?
Rendell: bring back the steel industry
Moran: [ facepalm ] oh god
Rendell: no one is willing to plan beyond the
next election
Moran: let’s talk about the next election - here’s robot Mitt Romney
Romney: Employers were so scared by the stimulus they refused to hire people!
Schwarzenegger: but zen zey Republicans zey claim credit for creating jobs eets hippocrazy
Rendell: that’s well put muscle man
Schwarzenegger: da steemuloos vas gud
for gullyfornia
Rendell: Romney is a clever liar his programmer should be very proud
Moran: it may be a lie but it worked - which is the only important thing
Rendell: Obama let the GOP spin the media on the people on the effectiveness of the stimulus
Moran: what should he have done?
Rendell: should have emphasized that the stimulus helped hard-working white people!
Moran: Conservatives had a conference - wow they are so popular with crazy people!
Schwarzenegger: zey are ze party of ‘No’ but zats
ok because peeple are very angry
Moran: we should give them all guns
Schwarzenegger: yah all lessons of life zey
can be learned from de sports
Moran: of course
Schwarzenegger: but you fail sometimes and zen you succeed - for example I vaz in zat movie about a
pregnant man and zen I married a kennedy
Moran: that’s very nice Arnold but let’s talk about how Obama is a failure
Rendell: Fuck you and fuck Congressman
Pence too
Moran: We have to raise taxes and cut Medicare
Rendell: we have to raise the retirement age on those lazy old people!
Schwarzenegger: ve need da high speed rail and
da vater projects just look at zee pershians and zee romans and ze Egypt peeples
Moran: health care?
Schwarzenegger: ve must talk about fat kids
Moran: anything else?
Schwarzenegger: Dort reform!
Rendell: Republicans should have ideas
that don’t suck
Schwarzenegger: oh noes zats not gud
*****************
Sunday, February 21, 2010
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5 comments:
Thank you. I'm sure this was much better and more accurate than the real thing!
These are hilarious.
I wish Schwarzenegger would get invited more often.
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