Host: Martha Raddatz
Dr. Ben Carson
Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-VT)
Raddatz: holy fuck it's an election year
and Iowa is only weeks a away
Raddatz: remember in 2008 Obama
shocked everyone winning Iowa and
then Clinton won in New Hampshire
so anything can happen!
Raddatz: get ready for more
insults and zingers and one liners!
Raddatz: who will rise and who will stumble?!
Llamas: wow one year ago Jeb was
the front runner and no one thought
Trump would even run and now he's
going to be our new dictator
Trump: Mexicans is rapists!
Llamas: in 2015 53 people ran for the
GOP nomination which made it hard for
anyone who wasn't a game show host
Llamas: Rubio is now the
Llamas: Ben Carson was once
the front-runner and now is in 4th place!
Llamas: it's now the voter's turn to
decide who the winners are instead of us
Raddatz: welcome Doctor Carson
Carson: nice to be here Mandy
Raddatz: your campaign is in total chaos
Carson: I need people who know
what the fuck they're doing
Raddatz: I see
Carson: a business man I have
learned you need people with
experience with executions
Raddatz: you were going to fire staffers
and they quit before you could
Carson: that is true
Raddatz: it seems like have trouble
getting competent people to work with you
Carson: in the next few weeks my
campaign is going to take off like a rocket!
Raddatz: what was wrong?
Carson: we couldn't get our policies out
Carson: I want a culture of openness
Raddatz: I see
Carson: also we need ideas
and a strategy and reason to be
Raddatz: whats the deal
with Armstrong Williams?
Carson: no doubt he's a bit of
dumbass but he's a close friend of mine
Raddatz: Saudia Arabia executed
a prominent Shiite cleric
Carson: Obama made them do it
by giving Iran a nuclear bomb
Raddatz: so you support their
execution of this cleric?
Carson: no but Obama is a silly person
Raddatz: you think Muslims
shouldn't be President
Carson: political correctness will destroy America!
Carson: the jihadis have said
they will use political correctness
to take over the USA
Raddatz: I didn't know that
Carson: if you go across the water from
Libya you're in Europe where they've
established a caliphate
Raddatz: should Donald Trump
watch what he says?
Carson: stop worry about offending
Muslims and worry about fighting them
Raddatz: thanks for coming Doctor
Carson: you too Mary
[ break ]
Raddatz: well panelists
what do you think?
Castellanos: Ben Carson is doomed
which is bad for Republicans because
it helps Ted Cruz who no one likes
Castellanos: Ben Carson is the moral
and spiritual leader of the GOP
Stewart: Carson is great surgeon
but his campaign is in disarray
Bai: it's not organizational problem
Jones: the person he needs
to fire is Ben Carson
Raddatz: that would really
shake his campaign up
Jones: he's a narcissist – no he
takes no personal responsibility
Castellanos: that's not fair – he's not a
narcissist he just thinks America needs
a total moral renewal and he's the one to do it
[ break ]
Vega: omg a year ago Hillary Clinton
was leading but now an old socialist
and a game show host threaten her
Vega: Sanders draws big crowds!
Vega: and now former friend Donald
Trump attacks Hillary and Bill Clinton too
Vega: Bill Clinton is unleashed in New
Hampshire but Sanders is from New England
[ break ]
Raddatz: welcome Bernie Sanders
Sanders: it's great to be here Maggie
Raddatz: you're too much of a political insider
Sanders: thats crazy – I've taken
on every special interest there is!
Sanders: the whole system is corrupt Martha!
Raddatz: you've been saying this 25
years and nothing has changed
Sanders: but now the middle class are
finally fed up and they won't take it anymore
Raddatz: but Clinton is leading in Iowa
Sanders: I'm getting huge crowds
Raddatz: that's nice
Sanders: people are sick of
establishment economics and a
corrupt campaign finance system!
Raddatz: is Bill Clinton's sex life fair game?
Sanders: no it's a stupid question Martha
Raddatz: all right then
Sanders: climate change is not a hoax
and we need a higher minimum wage!
Raddatz: you called Trump a pathological liar
Sanders: well he is
Raddatz: but that's mean
Sanders: American Muslims didn't
celebrate after 9/11
Raddatz: I suppose not
Raddatz: Obama will require gun background
checks but isn't that very divisive?
Sanders: well I wish we could get bipartisan
consensus through Congress but we can't
Raddatz: that's true
Sanders: but there is a national consensus
that we should have background checks
so aren't the GOP the ones being divisive?
Raddatz: you just blew my mind
Raddatz: you favor air strikes in Iraq
Sanders: yes but only with Muslim troops
volunteering to do the actual fighting
Raddatz: well good luck with that
Sanders: thanks Mandy