Sunday, November 13, 2011

Meet The Press - November 13, 2011

Guests:
Gov. Tom Corbett (R-PA)
Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN)
Rep. Debbie Wasserman-Schultz (R-FL)
E.J. Dionne
David Books
***********************************
Gregory: Governor are there more
victims that we don’t know about?

Corbett: almost certainly

Gregory: For parents with young children
like me who hear about an institutional
cover up of child rape we’re kind of shocked

Corbett: the people involved lack morals

Gregory: McQueary is on administrative leave
- is that enough?

Corbett: well he’s a valuable witness

Gregory: Paterno was only legally obligated
to report it to his boss - should the law
be changed?

Corbett: yes - being against child molesting
is bipartisan

Gregory: what hell was going on at
Second Mile??

Corbett: I don’t know but it seems like there
was some evil incestuous shit going down in
State College PA

Gregory: good god man how many people
knew about this and what is wrong with people?

Corbett: we have an investigation to find out
what kind of sick culture existed at Penn State

Gregory: did big football destroy Penn
State’s morals?

Corbett: no because small schools can be
corrupt too

Gregory: Should Penn State still be playing
football at a time like this?

Corbett: yes because we all love a good game

Gregory: Could this destroy Penn State?

Corbett: yes but they have a lot of sweet
football money socked away

Gregory: who else is going to be arrested?

Corbett: maybe lots of lots of people

[ break ]

Gregory: Rep. Bachmann should Congress
investigate Penn State?

Bachmann: I’m a mother and I would like to
beat this molesting bastard to a pulp

Gregory: but what about Congress - after all
they investigated steroids

Bachmann: Fluffy Congress is busy doing
nothing on many other issues

Gregory: fair enough

Gregory: you say you are the only conservative
in the race

Bachmann: darn right

Gregory: not Mitt Romney?

Bachmann: I opposed ObamaCare and he
implemented ObamaCare in Massachusetts!

Gregory: do you think Romney has no principles?

Bachmann: he’s in favor of gay marriage and
probably that weird stuff on Big Love

Gregory: you’re a woman

Bachmann: yes

Gregory: what about Herman Cain’s harassment

Bachmann: he’s a wackdoodle

Gregory: yes but so many Presidential
candidates are

Bachmann: but I won the Iowa straw poll

Gregory: Rick Perry has proved to be a moron
so maybe you can still win?

Bachmann: I plan to win Iowa, lose New
Hampshire and take South Carolina and
then victory!

Gregory: you say Obama let the ACLU to run
the CIA and is purposefully losing the
war on terror

Bachmann: absolutely

Gregory: he killed Osama bin Laden

Bachmann: yes but we have no jail for
terrorists so Obama just lets them all go!

Gregory: what the hell are you talking about?

Bachmann: the CIA doesn’t torture people and
that’s what I’m interested in

Gregory: okey dokey

Bachmann: when we catch terrorists we give
them a slap on the wrist with the wimpy
Army Field Manual which is totally gay

Gregory: most Generals don’t agree with torture

Bachmann: yes but noted ghoul Dick Cheney
agrees with me

Gregory: that’s just creepy

Bachmann: Bush won the war in Iraq and
Obama is losing it including all that money
wasted on that wonderful war

Gregory: one more quick question -
are you insane?

Bachmann: the people of Iraq should pay us
back for the cost of invading their country by
mistake including millions of dollars for every
American soldier killed

Gregory: thanks for coming crazy lady

Gregory: Debbie the debates don’t make
Obama look good but the economy still sucks

Wasserman-Schultz: yes but the GOP are evil

Gregory: people are worse off than they
were 4 years ago

Wasserman-Schultz: no they aren’t Fluffy
- we’re adding millions of jobs

Gregory: why doesn’t Obama make the Super
Committee cut the debt?!?

Wasserman-Schultz: how about taxing
millionaires and billionaires?

Gregory: the GOP proposed raising taxes
this week

Wasserman-Schultz: oh bullshit Fluffy -
they only did that in exchange for lower taxes
for rich people which would increase the debt

Gregory: but Obama raised the debt

Wasserman-Schultz: the GOP borrowed money
to pay for 2 wars, a fancy prescription drug program
and tax cuts for the rich

Gregory: but the debt is still high

Wasserman-Schultz: you are exceptionally
dim Fluffy

Gregory: the debt!

Wasserman-Schultz: we adding private sector
jobs like crazy

Gregory: ok ok Debbie

Wasserman-Schultz: check your facts!

Gregory: alright ha ha

[ break ]

Gregory: Cain is almost tied for the lead
and he’s an idiot harasser

Brooks: because he’s a lot of fun

Gregory: Perry forgot the three agencies
he would do away with

Dionne: omg that was painful to watch

Gregory: Poor Ricky

Dionne: the Democrats should pay for a
GOP debate every week

Gregory: we already have that

Dionne: there is a room another candidate
to get in believe it or not

Gregory: who is Obama?

Brooks: no one knows - some say he is a
Kenyan muslim and other says is he a British
anti-colonial Indonesian

Dionne: Romney wants to start a war with
Iran which I’m not sure is Americans’ first priority

Gregory: Maureen Dowd says Penn State is
almost as bad as the Catholic Church

Dionne: Now we know about alleged horrific
misdeeds which were covered up and so far
the penalty paid by the University is nothing at all

Greg: kids on campus rioted in favor of
Joe Paterno - what hell?

Brooks: in the 1960s kids smoked pot and said
‘if it feels good do it’ and America forgot the
difference between right from wrong and evil
and sin all that stuff hippies do

Dionne: I think people know child molesting is bad

Brooks: people don’t intervene when they
hear racist comments

Dionne: that would ruin most Thanksgiving dinners

Gregory: do really think that people really
not know that child rape is wrong?

Brooks: yes because of the Kitty Genovese case

Gregory: there’s no reporting requirement
in Pennsylvania

Brooks: we are too obsessed with the law
in this nation

Dionne: I was shocked by the extent of the
Penn State cover-up

Greg: but after the Catholic Church scandal
I would have thought not nothing could shock you

Dionne: but this isn’t about a bunch of men
and boys in funny outfits who get together every
Sunday who believe they have supernatural powers
- this is about big time college football!

Gregory: and that’s another episode of
Meet The Press
***************************************

1 comment:

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Dionne: Romney wants to start a war with Iran which I’m not sure is Americans’ first priority.

Check with Obama and Hillary, I'm pretty sure it's high on their list.
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