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Meet The Press
June 29, 2008
Host: Tom Brokaw
Guests:
Gov. Dave Freudenthal, D-Wyoming
Gov. Bill Ritter, D-Colorado
Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, R-California
Chuck Todd
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Brokaw: i'm tom brokaw - i'm not an effete Nantucket dude like Tim Russert I'm a working class guy from the West in front of a fireplace
Audience: but in Jackson Hole in the average home costs $900,000
Brokaw: shhhhhhhhh
Brokaw: Hillary?
Bill Ritter: Obama can win here people like his message
Dave Freudenthal: dave you keep flip flopping on Obama - McCain
Freudenthal: yeah but McCain has morphed into Dick Cheney
Brokaw: Dick is from Wyoming
Freudenthal: don't remind me that about that fucker
Brokaw: can Hussein win Wyoming?
Freudenthal: no but we are independent minded so you never know
Brokaw: Hispanics?
Ritter: Obama will win them because he is optimistic and smart and not an old, out of touch, pandering loon
Brokaw: McCain wants to drill in your state and build 45 nukes
Freudenthal: that's because he's an idiot
Brokaw: true but McCain was a POW
Freudenthal: i don't give a shit - Obama has a good environmental policy
Brokaw: you are sitting on a mountain of coal should we stop using coal
Freudenthal: hmmm, let me think about that ..... no
Brokaw: nuke plants?
Freudenthal: sure but also we have a lot of wind here especially since Meet the Press showed up
Brokaw: touché
Ritter: we have to have a national policy on greenhouse gases
Brokaw: will Woody Biomass speak at the DNC
Ritter: he's very green
Brokaw: give me an example
Ritter: at the Convention the media will be given recycled caviar
Brokaw: aw nawes
Brokaw: are at a stage in this national when laws might be different from Wyoming to Harlem??
Freudenthal: could be
Ritter: as a law talking guy I say we still should have the ability to crack skulls
Brokaw: just allow guns in DC
Ritter: right
Brokaw: abortion!
Ritter: we here in the west like fetuses in fact here they do goat-riding
Brokaw: the war!
Freudenthal: it's very nice but people really care about fueling their pickup trucks
Brokaw: should we leave Iraq?
Freudenthal: no we should stay and listen to the Generals
Brokaw: so why endorse Obama
Freudenthal: in the West we are independent for example we still reserve the right to settle disputes with a shootout
Ritter: Colorado has sent more national guard than anyone else so of course we love the war
Brokaw: does Obama have values like right wing evangelicals or is he a sinner
Ritter: no asshole he does have values - like he cares about the future of the earth
Brokaw: illegal Mexicans!
Ritter: our farmers and waiters all left
Brokaw: oh noes
Brokaw: this is where the Buffalo roam
Freudenthal: Bush sucks on that issue too
Brokaw: go bills!
Freudenthal: Kempthorne has no support from Bush
Brokaw: who is that??
Freudenthal: Bush's Sec. of Interior
Brokaw: oh that explains it
Brokaw: Cheney is from Wyoming
Freudenthal: people despise that fucker although he has pandered for us from time to time
Brokaw: can the West show us all how we can all get along
Ritter: that's right - the high elevation and rocky mountains and desert heat mess with out haids
Freudenthal: we're pragmatic if not we're going to get killed by a grizzly bear or an Indian
[ break ]
Brokaw: gimme your Russert love
Schwarzenegger: Russert promised to make me President
Brokaw: well you are a Republican
Schwarzenegger: its not a humor!!
Brokaw: you have presided over a depression in callyfornia
Schwarzenegger: doan be a girly-man!
Brokaw: your economy sucks
Schwarzenegger: what goes up must come down
Brokaw: you spend like crazy
Schwarzenegger: we're building levees and schools and stealing water for the next generation of desert dwellers
Brokaw: people hate you
Schwarzenegger: hey i had a great body building career
Brokaw: will the GOP lose all their congressional seats?
Schwarzenegger: who cares i hate them all
Brokaw: so you hate the GOP
Schwarzenegger: no dems have now Congress and they suck
Brokaw: you endorsed pander bear
Schwarzenegger: i love him but i disagree with him on everything -- it's like with my wife
Brokaw: how so?
Schwarzenegger: i'm with them both out of political expediency
Brokaw: let me quote the Mustache of Pandering - Tom Freidmann says Bush is evil
Schwarzenegger: look i'm just a bad actor with a lot of muscles - get off my back!!
Brokaw: you're a politician
Schwarzenegger: stop picking on Bush it's easy to pick on a guy with mental problems
Brokaw: housing crisis??
Schwarzenegger: dis ess vewy sad -- we must pump.... the economy up!!!
Brokaw: answer the question
Schwarzenegger: the economists lied to me!!
Brokaw: you should read more Eschaton
Schwarzenegger: is that a bodybuilding magazine?
Brokaw: explain housing to me
Schwarzenegger: eet vas a bubble
Brokaw: gays!
Schwarzenegger: i had a lot of gay friends in bodybuilding and it's wrong to ban gay marriage - although i don't like gay marriage
Brokaw: abortion?
Schwarzenegger: I support a waiting period and notification of parents 100%
Brokaw: Maria endorsed Obama - you guys are trying to have it both ways
Schwarzenegger: see we're not so dumb
Brokaw: I get that sense
Schwarzenegger: would like to see my pecs?
Brokaw: No thanks
Schwarzenegger: McCain is THE MAN!!
Brokaw: do you ever talk to Caroline Kennedy
Schwarzenegger: can you believe i managed to marry into the Kennedy family it's what i dreamed of as a sexually conflicted young boy in Austria
Brokaw: McCain's Veep?
Schwarzenegger: he should find someone with many muscles
Schwarzenegger: McCain can bring the parties together after all he has taken every position on everything
Brokaw: like you did in california
Schwarzenegger: yes exactly we should have no partisanship and work together just as soon as we recall all dems with lies and install Republican b-movie action stars in power
[ break]
Brokaw: tell me about the West
Chuck Todd: the West is turning Blue!
Brokaw: but they are can-do guys
Todd: yeah right the GOP went whacko and the allowed the latte-drinking america haters to take the West
Brokaw: McCain is a war hero and a maverick!
Todd: yeah but there are lot of young people out here and hispanics
Brokaw: so what?
Todd: the name Tom Tancredo mean anything to you?
Brokaw: the Dems are cheating by holding their convention in Denver
Todd: sadly they are having trouble selling out to corporate america
Brokaw: Veeps?
Todd: McCain needs to choose someone from the West
Brokaw: but he's from Arizona!
Todd: yeah but Mitt Romney could help with Mormons in Utah and robots in sillicon valley
Brokaw: Obama is running on the money from crazies on the interent
Todd: no traction yet but someday maybe in the future John McCain won't be fucked
Brokaw: thank you Todd here's your check from GE
Todd: merci
Brokaw: how many clintons will speak at Denver
Todd: two - Hillary and Chelsea
Brokaw: no bill?
Todd: no there will a MST3K tribute video
Brokaw: oarsome
Sunday, June 29, 2008
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1 comment:
U R brilliant.
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