Guests:
John
Kerry – Secretary of State
Sen.
Rand Paul - (R-KY)
David
Axelrod
Anita
Dunn
Bill
de Blasio – Mayor of New York (D)
Stephanie
Rawlings-Blake
–
Mayor
of Baltimore (D)
Maria
Hinojosa – NPR Latino USA
David
Brooks – NYT
Hugh
Hewitt
Hodor
Todd:
OMG Hillary Clinton is
running
for President!
Audience:
omg omg omg
Todd:
she is announcing via
twitter
like a social media boss!
Todd:
Hillary Clinton's biggest
opponent
is Hillary Clinton
Audience:
damn she's a tough one
Axelrod:
she had an attitude of
entitlement
in 2008 and it backfired
Todd:
now she will be humble like
in
2000 when she had a listening tour
Dunn:
she has to show her human side
Todd:
it's hard to create a first
impression
for the 20th
time
Todd:
she's been in the
public
eye for 20 years
Axelrod:
okay you're 'Ready for Hillary'
but
what are you ready for?
Advisor:
the
middle class?
[
break ]
Todd:
welcome Mayor
de
Blasio: greetings from
the
Big Apple Charles
Todd:
you ran her campaign
in
2000 – how does Hillary win?
de
Blasio: she has to go out
and
listen to ordinary people
Todd:
you want to push
her
to the left don't you?
de
Blasio: we've got the worst income
inequality
since the Great Depression
Todd:
is that right?
de
Blasio: you can't just talk
about
it–
you've
got to pledge
to
tax the wealthy
to
pay for more
bridges
the wealthy drive over
Todd:
what is her big idea?
de
Blasio: she has time to present her vision
Todd:
what do you suggest?
de
Blasio: since 2008 we've had
an
economic crisis and a recovery
benefiting
the richest Americans
Todd:
Rand Paul says Hillary
caused
the recession in 2007
de
Blasio: Rand Paul is an idiot
Todd:
that's true
de
Blasio: Democrats need to
boldly
push a progressive vision!
Todd:
so you say
de
Blasio: progressives are
demanding
economic change
Todd:
go on Bill
de
Blasio: we need more
benefits
for poor people!
Todd:
are you endorsing her
or
are you waiting?
de
Blasio: I want to see a bold
progressive
vision
Todd:
thanks for coming
de
Blasio: you too Todd
[
break ]
Todd:
wow even de Blasio
won't
endorse her!
Hinojosa:
you see activists want
to
push her to the left
Todd:
oooh
Hinojosa:
she's at her best
when
no one is watching
Todd:
people don't think she's
honest
or trustworthy
Brooks:
the most important
quality
in a politician is imagination
which
she doesn't have
Todd:
are you sure you're not
thinking
of New York Times columnists?
Brooks:
that could be
Todd:
she's very cautious
Rawlings-Blake:
don't read too
much
into de Blasio's comments
Todd:
Republicans are
campaigning
on lost e-mails
Hewitt:
they're mad because
she's
moving in on their turf
Todd:
are the Republicans too obsessed
with
inventing Clinton scandals?
Hewitt:
no! She put condoms on
the
White House Christmas tree!
Todd:
right I forgot
Hewitt:
Clinton has never been vetted!
No
one knows anything about her!
Where
did she even come from?
Was
she born in America?
Todd:
calm down Hugh
Brooks:
Hillary Clinton needs to
reach
out to stupid
white
people
Todd:
you mean she should read your column
Brooks:
right
Hodor:
Hodor!
Todd:
thanks for coming all
[
break ]
Todd:
welcome Secretary Kerry
Kerry:
morning Todd
Kerry:
did you recommend taking
Cuba
off the list of sponsors of terror?
Kerry:
sure – Cuba is a lovely place
Todd:
interesting
Kerry:
how can you trust Iran
when
they sponsor terrorism?
Todd:
we don't trust Iran
Todd:
you don't?
Kerry:
this agreement is based on verification
Todd:
oh all right
Kerry:
this agreement will prevent
Iran
from getting a nuclear bomb
without
starting a war
Todd:
how disappointing
Kerry:
we will shut off all their
abilities
to build a nuclear bomb
Todd:
the Ayatollah says
America
is lying about the agreement
Kerry:
well he's wrong
Todd:
why would he lie?
Kerry:
to spin for the Iran hard liners
Todd:
okay
Kerry:
even the Russians
are
backing us up on this!
Todd:
oh well never mind then
Kerry:
I stand by my version of the agreement
Todd:
well okay but if the other
side
disagrees you don't really
have
an agreement do you?
Kerry:
if we don't get a good
deal
we will walk away
Todd:
got it
Kerry:
but we can't have Congress
nitpicking
this to death
Todd:
does Hillary need a tough
primary
or is a coronation a good thing?
Kerry:
I like Hillary but I'm
out
of politics Chuck
[
break ]
Todd:
how would tv been forced to
cover
the Walter Scott shooting without video
Fake
Report: police say a cop was forced
to
shoot and kill a driver who gained control
of
his taser and cops delivered CPR and
it's
sad but Walter Scott had a long rap
sheet
so he had it coming
Todd:
that's the only way we could have
covered
the story because we are required
by
law to repeat the police version
of
events unquestioningly
Todd:
this cold-blooded killing
shows
the importance of cameras on cops
Rawlings-Blake:
covering up
murder
is a bad thing Charles
Todd:
with body cameras on cops
complaints
against are down 80%
Hewitt:
look at the movie Furious 7
– do
we really want police filming stuff?
Todd:
plus cameras are so expensive!
Hinojosa:
the kid who filmed the
murder
was dismissed by the police
Todd:
we all
want
to trust cops
Hinojosa:
well we all want a revolution
but
that's not going to happen either
Hodor:
Hodor!
Todd:
David you're an expert on policing
Brooks:
my slogan is if your mom
tells
you she loves
you
check it
Todd:
I'd say that's especially
good
advice in your case
Brooks:
I don't trust cops
Todd:
I'm sure the feeling is mutual
Brooks:
cameras can be abused
– what
about filming domestic violence?
Todd:
also it's a Fourth Amendment
issue
which I know nothing about
[
break ]
Todd:
omg poor people pay a
higher
percentage of their income
in
taxes than rich people do
Audience:
no!
Todd:
rich people pay 2% taxes
in
Florida and Wyoming
Rich
People: why so much?
[
break ]
Todd:
welcome Senator Paul
Paul:
hi Todd
Todd:
which country poses
the
biggest threat to America?
Paul:
Iran but also North Korea
and
also Pakistan and also Red Sox nation
Todd:
good list
Paul:
also Russia – we once had
hopes
for them but then they invaded
Crimea
which is terrible because
I
had to look it up on a map
Todd:
you don't want to invade
the
whole Middle East – why is that?
Paul:
before we invade the whole
region
we should think before we act
Todd:
what an odd notion
Paul:
every time we topple a dictator
chaos
ensues and we empower radicals
Todd:
which is more important –
bombing
Iran or ISIS?
Paul:
why not both?
Todd:
yeah but no one is talking
about
bombing ISIS
Paul:
I attached a declaration of
war
against ISIS to a water bill
Todd:
you're a wily one
Paul:
I'm still pushing for war!
Todd:
well good for you
Paul:
if Obama wanted to be a uniter
he
would have gone to Congress and
begged
them to let him kill ISIS
Todd:
would you nullify the Iran
deal
as President?
Paul:
Iran doesn't seem to think
what
the agreement is what Kerry says it is
Todd:
but what about the
agreement
as described?
Paul:
I don't reject it just because
Obama
did it or negotiated with Iran
Todd:
that's unusual
Paul:
sure Reagan negotiated
with
the Soviets after all
Todd:
true enough
Paul:
but we don't even know
what
the agreement really is now
Todd:
you once said if GOP didn't
nominate
your dad it was headed for oblivion
Paul:
that may still be true
Todd:
where do you disagree with your dad
Paul:
oh come on
Todd:
indulge me
Paul:
we both believe in a strong defense
and
less intervention and we both oppose civil rights laws
Todd:
you a lot of fights with reporters
Paul:
I need my coffee
Todd:
you're not a morning person?
Paul:
no I'm a surgeon
Todd:
don't cut me doc
Paul:
look I'm a doctor
and
I like direct questions
Todd:
ok how's this – are you crazy?
Paul:
I don't like it when reporters
ask
about my opinions
Todd:
welcome to politics Rand
Paul:
piss off Chucky
Todd:
you bring up Hillary Clinton's
past
but you run away from your own past
Paul:
Clinton supports Saudi Arabia
which
represses women which is just terrible
Todd:
so when you're President
Saudi
Arabia
will no longer be an ally?!
Paul:
no no no – I'm talking about when
Hillary
Clinton should not not what
I
should do
Todd:
you're the anti-Washington
candidate
but you're running for Senate
and
President at the same time
Paul:
you gotta cover your bases Ted
[
break ]
Todd:
OMG Bill Clinton
could
be the First Husband!
Blake-Rawlings:
we need more Bill Clinton!
Hewitt:
Rand Paul is man of great integrity
and
Bill and Hillary are criminals
Brooks:
Clinton is my personal hero
for
taking down Sister Soujah before
could
she took over America
Todd:
does Hillary Clinton have
that
'not so fresh'
feeling?
Hinojosa:
you telling a women she's
expired
and useless and incur the
wrath
of women everywhere Carlos
Hewitt:
yes but people hate Hillary
Todd:
young people don't even remember
her
lesbian affair with Vince Foster
Blake-Rawlings:
good point
Todd:
I am wearing purple
socks
in honor of Bob Schieffer
Hodor:
Hodor!
Todd: and that's another
episode
of Meet The Press
2 comments:
Heh. Thanks.
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